Almost Christmas
Last night was an all time weird. He didn't want to put in any energy in to having sex. But after he took his valium and was ready to go to sleep, he moves the covers to see if my butt's naked. I ask why. He said something about a fantasy. So, he wants to fantasy about my butt, but not have sex. and why do I care? Is he using the image to masterbate? I hate my life. I keep going forward, because I don't know what else to do.
I worry about anybody reading this, I only post when I'm feeling negative and need to vent. I don't feel like this all the time. But alot of the time.
I still have one foot out the door. I don't feel like I can commit to such a sexual deviant. But the canbis oil that that I take for the relapsing Polyconditis makes me horny. I wish I wasn't. If I could go long enough without, then he would quit "loving" me (for lack of a better word). And I could just move on.
Utah legalized cannabis, but they want control so bad, that they're going to ruin it. So, moving back home, hopefully before Christmas. but feeling overwhelmed and alone.
I'm hoping to move Max to Dinosaur, but can't find anything and he doesn't really want to move.
Tiffany says I complain either way things happen. I've become that person. I've gotta find a way to switch my brain. I use to be more possitive.
We can't go to Hawaii this year, because out of no where, now Tony's afraid to go through TSA, because ONE time he got groped. It wasn't even on the last trip. And how evil the government is. They've been this evil for decades, and it's not going to change. In fact they're only going to get worse. And the Mormon conrol State feels the worse. They are so evil that even though the people passed legal cannabis, they are changing and cutting out people's will.
I worry about anybody reading this, I only post when I'm feeling negative and need to vent. I don't feel like this all the time. But alot of the time.
I still have one foot out the door. I don't feel like I can commit to such a sexual deviant. But the canbis oil that that I take for the relapsing Polyconditis makes me horny. I wish I wasn't. If I could go long enough without, then he would quit "loving" me (for lack of a better word). And I could just move on.
Utah legalized cannabis, but they want control so bad, that they're going to ruin it. So, moving back home, hopefully before Christmas. but feeling overwhelmed and alone.
I'm hoping to move Max to Dinosaur, but can't find anything and he doesn't really want to move.
Tiffany says I complain either way things happen. I've become that person. I've gotta find a way to switch my brain. I use to be more possitive.
We can't go to Hawaii this year, because out of no where, now Tony's afraid to go through TSA, because ONE time he got groped. It wasn't even on the last trip. And how evil the government is. They've been this evil for decades, and it's not going to change. In fact they're only going to get worse. And the Mormon conrol State feels the worse. They are so evil that even though the people passed legal cannabis, they are changing and cutting out people's will.