time makes you bolder, children get older, I'm getting older too.
I wish you out of the woods
And into a picture with me
I wish you over the moon
Come out of the question and be
If this is gonna run 'round in my head
I might as well be dreaming
Run 'round in my head
I roller coaster for you
Time out of mind must be heavenly
It's all enchanted and wild
Just like my heart said it was gonna be
If this is gonna run 'round in my head
I might as well be dreaming
Run 'round in my head
I wish you out of the woods
And into the picture with me
I wish you over the moon
Come out of the question and be
If this is gonna run 'round in my head
I might as well be dreaming
- Nickel Creek
Sometimes when you think about some memories you get a little stabbing pain in your chest - even though it's supposed to be a happy memory.
I think this is because you miss the feeling you had when you were living it - and you miss it so much it hurts to even remember it at all.
I don't think I could ever say I don't have any regrets. People say to live without them, but I don't think this makes very much sense. No one can live their whole life being happy about everything they've done or not done.
I wish I would have been nicer to Becca Neil in Middle School, especially since I stole her best friend away.
I wish I would have told Nate I couldn't date him anymore after those first few weeks, because it didn't feel right.
I wish I would have tried harder to write good papers in high school.
I wish I would have kissed Joel that night he took me fishing.
I wish I would have made a better effort to become friends with my lit professor last semester.
I wish I wouldn't have tried so hard to get people to like me in elementary school after we moved to Washington.
I wish I would have gone on the Matterhorn with Lisa and Clark in 8th grade.
I wish I wouldn't have written in my livejournal about Nate going to Tolo with Lauren Carr.
I wish I would have asked Ben out for a few dates in high school. He treated me so well.
I wish I wouldn't have gotten upset about Sean dating my roommate. It really didn't bother me, but I wanted attention.
I wish I would have said thank you more to my Mom and Dad when I was little.
I wish I could have been friends with Rachel Swan for longer than I have.
I wish I wouldn't have spent so much money on things I don't need.
I wish I would have practiced piano more all my life.
I wish I would have spent more time with Heidi over break.
I wish I truly liked myself every single day.
I like my regrets. I think that you have regrets so that you will not think you have nothing to change about yourself. Everyone has to change things. I feel good when I remember that.
I like listening to bluegrass music. It calms me down and helps me smooth out the wrinkles in all my thoughts. It makes everything seem peaceful and pleasant.
It also makes me remember things. Lots of things.
Even some things that put that little stabbing pain in my chest.
But I think about them anyway...
and I honestly do not know why this is.