Earth 11

[arch_schatten]

In a move of greatness I forgot to post last night! uhm.. that's my third strike this NaBloPoMo. Erm. Well. The month is almost over and I'm hoping to catch up this weekend with everything I haven't catch up. Let's see if I can make it

Comments

[vigilante_wake]

LOL, I'm glad you didn't turn out a Leo so you could save yourself the embarrassment during the Titanic madness.. though, sometimes it seems as thought life would have been easier as a boy, doesn't it?

It does. I mean, do guys go out for a walk around the neighborhood at night and jump at every shadow that moves because they're afraid that it's some creep who is going to jump out of the bushes and rape them? I doubt it. And then there's the whole being able to get away with doing less about your appearance and yet still being considered attractive thing. However, I think I would be terrifically ugly as a guy.

I think you would have been/would be a terrific theater actor/director/scriptwriter :) may I ask why didn't you pursue it further?

I've been thinking about this question for the past couple of days and I still can't come up with a satisfactory answer. I mean, theater was my thing in high school. Sure, I was in the band and known for being good at English, but I participated in every play my school put on, even if it was just the person who opened and closed the curtain. I had the lead in my class senior play (I was Helen Keller in The Miracle Worker) and, for a few weeks afterward, I knew what is was like to be popular. Random people would come up to me in the halls and tell me how great I had been in the play.

I got a scholarship to Indiana University and was allowed to declare my major early. I picked theater of course, although I didn't know whether I wanted to act, design, or write plays yet. And then, somehow, I just lost the desire to try anymore. The thing about theater is that you really have to want it and suddenly I just...didn't.

Maybe it had something to do with my dad being sick. I wish I could blame it on some external cause, but I feel that it's really a character flaw that didn't emerge until college for some reason. I'm obviously still struggling with it, and in the meantime, I'm just kind of drifting, I guess.

Anyway, I think I would have been tougher or braver or something as a boy and maybe I would have stuck with it.