Latest wave of whiny babies!
First my dad's email!:
Happy Birthday Andrew! (Fireworks attached)
"Now there is no law against a man's belief; for it was strictly contrary
to the commands of GOD that there should be a law which should bring men
onto unequal grounds. For thus saith the scripture: Choose ye this day,
whom ye will serve. Now if a man desired to serve GOD, it was his
privilege; or rather if he believed in GOD it was his privilege to serve
him: but if he did not believe in him there was no law to punish him." --
Alma 30: 7-9
You have indicated a desire to change your status, both in the family and
to the world. I believe we have some choices:
1) Nothing changes. You continue to go to Church with Mom, attend
Seminary and do the various things you should be doing. You already are
not doing "Priesthood things." You have indicated this is not your desire
any longer.
2) As a family, we sit down and agree to rules for your living in our
home. This would include required chores (i.e. working for room and board)
as well as what other activities you would participate in.
3) If you want to be the true independent idealist the proclamation
declares, you will want to pay reasonable room and board charges, get a job
and provide for yourself as any other independent adult would do.
4) Some combination of the above choices.
There are two things which will not be acceptable from an adult. First is
disrespect and the second is additude. We will respect you and require you
to respect us.
"O ye that are bound down under a foolish and a vain hope,, why do ye yoke
yourselves with such foolish things? ... Behold, these things which ye call
prophecies, which ye say are handed down by holy prophets, behold, they are
foolish traditions of your fathers. How do ye now of their surety?
Behold, ye can not know of things which ye do not see....behold, it is the
effect of a frenzied mind; and this derangement of your minds comes because
of the traditions of your fathers, which lead you away into a belief of
things which are not so..." --Alma 30: 13-16
Similar to Joseph Smith, some very real, physical events happened to me in
direct, immediate response to sincere prayer and, similar to his words, I
knew it was true and I knew that GOD knew and I can not deny it. GOD
lives, Jesus is the Christ and Joseph Smith is a prophet. You may not
believe now but be careful about making choices that you will regret at a
future time. There is only one truth, and in the end, that is all that
matters. If you are wrong, the results are forever. Seek truth, not lies,
seek light, not darkness. We are all imperfect and make mistakes. It is
part of life. It is the reason for the atonement.
Ponder your choices well. Respect your Mother.
I will see you Friday evening.
Love,
Dad
[Original Message]
From: Arablizzard
Date: 11/2/2005 1:01:18 AM
Subject: Happy Birthday!
Dear Family,
This world is full of crazy people, I'm one of them!
My Response!:
"1) Nothing changes. You continue to go to Church with Mom, attend Seminary and do the various
things you should be doing. You already are not doing 'Priesthood things.' You have indicated
this is not your desire any longer."
The mere existence of this line suggests you are seeking revenge for my choice. It is a classic
tactic used many times before, "If you come back now, everything will be returned to normal with
no consequence; so long as you do what we say and abandon your own beliefs." This is a VERY
hypocritical thing to say, and is in fact contrary to the teachings of the Mormon religion (which
says very clearly to provide UNconditional love and to not hold grudges or seek revenge for what
another person has done; they also encourage to love your nonmember friends as well). Actions
speak more than words, so instead of providing threats, why not lead by example?
"2) As a family, we sit down and agree to rules for your living in our home. This would include
required chores (i.e. working for room and board) as well as what other activities you would
participate in."
I agree, as a complete family (all members present) we should sit down and discuss this. However,
any terms will be decided by ALL members. I will not be pushed to sign anything this weekend; I
believe the true key to being an adult is to have a civil conversation where each party is allowed
to state their views and be able to separate the person from the problem.
"3) If you want to be the true independent idealist the proclamation declares, you will want to
pay reasonable room and board charges, get a job and provide for yourself as any other independent
adult would do."
I would appreciate your assistance in finding a job; however this will be discussed in our "family
meeting".
"There are two things which will not be acceptable from an adult. First is disrespect and the
second is additude. We will respect you and require you to respect us."
(attitude is not spelled additude by the way)
From webster.com
Main Entry: civil disobedience
Function: noun
: refusal to obey governmental demands or commands especially as a nonviolent and usually
collective means of forcing concessions from the government
In this case, writing is nonviolent. I stated my opinions in writing that neither attacked nor
threatened. This morning, I did not insult, disrespect, or show attitude towards mother, I simply
chose to ignore her attempts to violate my freedom of religion by forcing me to go to seminary.
It is also worth noting, that during the course of the day, I had attempted to make conversation
with her while riding in the car (she did not respond); also, I showed no signs of hostility
towards her. Mother was using a form of emotional defense called projection, where her feelings
were projected onto me because displacing feelings, that may otherwise be too difficult to accept,
is a more acceptable form of dealing with stress (ie. I do not hate him, it is he who hates me).
During the day, I had no feeling of bitterness towards her at all, but rather frustration at the
way she handled the situation.
Something else that should be noticed: you are needlessly capitalizing the word "god"; can this
not be considered using the word in a hateful manor (similar in intent to "bible bashing") as
writing a word in capital in a piece of writing is considered yelling to the persons reading it?
If it is a word you hold dearly, then you shouldn't be abusing it so. Your attempt in writing
this response was as childish as you claim I am being, also I find it very amusing that you have
edited out my letter so that only "Dear Family, This world is full of crazy people, I'm one of
them!" remains (the signature was not meant to be added in the first place, however the save as
draft option does not save the checkbox for the signature option).
"We are all imperfect and make mistakes."
I could not agree more, perhaps you should reconsider your approach in a more clear state of mind.
Sincerely,
Andrew
Happy Birthday Andrew! (Fireworks attached)
"Now there is no law against a man's belief; for it was strictly contrary
to the commands of GOD that there should be a law which should bring men
onto unequal grounds. For thus saith the scripture: Choose ye this day,
whom ye will serve. Now if a man desired to serve GOD, it was his
privilege; or rather if he believed in GOD it was his privilege to serve
him: but if he did not believe in him there was no law to punish him." --
Alma 30: 7-9
You have indicated a desire to change your status, both in the family and
to the world. I believe we have some choices:
1) Nothing changes. You continue to go to Church with Mom, attend
Seminary and do the various things you should be doing. You already are
not doing "Priesthood things." You have indicated this is not your desire
any longer.
2) As a family, we sit down and agree to rules for your living in our
home. This would include required chores (i.e. working for room and board)
as well as what other activities you would participate in.
3) If you want to be the true independent idealist the proclamation
declares, you will want to pay reasonable room and board charges, get a job
and provide for yourself as any other independent adult would do.
4) Some combination of the above choices.
There are two things which will not be acceptable from an adult. First is
disrespect and the second is additude. We will respect you and require you
to respect us.
"O ye that are bound down under a foolish and a vain hope,, why do ye yoke
yourselves with such foolish things? ... Behold, these things which ye call
prophecies, which ye say are handed down by holy prophets, behold, they are
foolish traditions of your fathers. How do ye now of their surety?
Behold, ye can not know of things which ye do not see....behold, it is the
effect of a frenzied mind; and this derangement of your minds comes because
of the traditions of your fathers, which lead you away into a belief of
things which are not so..." --Alma 30: 13-16
Similar to Joseph Smith, some very real, physical events happened to me in
direct, immediate response to sincere prayer and, similar to his words, I
knew it was true and I knew that GOD knew and I can not deny it. GOD
lives, Jesus is the Christ and Joseph Smith is a prophet. You may not
believe now but be careful about making choices that you will regret at a
future time. There is only one truth, and in the end, that is all that
matters. If you are wrong, the results are forever. Seek truth, not lies,
seek light, not darkness. We are all imperfect and make mistakes. It is
part of life. It is the reason for the atonement.
Ponder your choices well. Respect your Mother.
I will see you Friday evening.
Love,
Dad
[Original Message]
From: Arablizzard
Date: 11/2/2005 1:01:18 AM
Subject: Happy Birthday!
Dear Family,
This world is full of crazy people, I'm one of them!
My Response!:
"1) Nothing changes. You continue to go to Church with Mom, attend Seminary and do the various
things you should be doing. You already are not doing 'Priesthood things.' You have indicated
this is not your desire any longer."
The mere existence of this line suggests you are seeking revenge for my choice. It is a classic
tactic used many times before, "If you come back now, everything will be returned to normal with
no consequence; so long as you do what we say and abandon your own beliefs." This is a VERY
hypocritical thing to say, and is in fact contrary to the teachings of the Mormon religion (which
says very clearly to provide UNconditional love and to not hold grudges or seek revenge for what
another person has done; they also encourage to love your nonmember friends as well). Actions
speak more than words, so instead of providing threats, why not lead by example?
"2) As a family, we sit down and agree to rules for your living in our home. This would include
required chores (i.e. working for room and board) as well as what other activities you would
participate in."
I agree, as a complete family (all members present) we should sit down and discuss this. However,
any terms will be decided by ALL members. I will not be pushed to sign anything this weekend; I
believe the true key to being an adult is to have a civil conversation where each party is allowed
to state their views and be able to separate the person from the problem.
"3) If you want to be the true independent idealist the proclamation declares, you will want to
pay reasonable room and board charges, get a job and provide for yourself as any other independent
adult would do."
I would appreciate your assistance in finding a job; however this will be discussed in our "family
meeting".
"There are two things which will not be acceptable from an adult. First is disrespect and the
second is additude. We will respect you and require you to respect us."
(attitude is not spelled additude by the way)
From webster.com
Main Entry: civil disobedience
Function: noun
: refusal to obey governmental demands or commands especially as a nonviolent and usually
collective means of forcing concessions from the government
In this case, writing is nonviolent. I stated my opinions in writing that neither attacked nor
threatened. This morning, I did not insult, disrespect, or show attitude towards mother, I simply
chose to ignore her attempts to violate my freedom of religion by forcing me to go to seminary.
It is also worth noting, that during the course of the day, I had attempted to make conversation
with her while riding in the car (she did not respond); also, I showed no signs of hostility
towards her. Mother was using a form of emotional defense called projection, where her feelings
were projected onto me because displacing feelings, that may otherwise be too difficult to accept,
is a more acceptable form of dealing with stress (ie. I do not hate him, it is he who hates me).
During the day, I had no feeling of bitterness towards her at all, but rather frustration at the
way she handled the situation.
Something else that should be noticed: you are needlessly capitalizing the word "god"; can this
not be considered using the word in a hateful manor (similar in intent to "bible bashing") as
writing a word in capital in a piece of writing is considered yelling to the persons reading it?
If it is a word you hold dearly, then you shouldn't be abusing it so. Your attempt in writing
this response was as childish as you claim I am being, also I find it very amusing that you have
edited out my letter so that only "Dear Family, This world is full of crazy people, I'm one of
them!" remains (the signature was not meant to be added in the first place, however the save as
draft option does not save the checkbox for the signature option).
"We are all imperfect and make mistakes."
I could not agree more, perhaps you should reconsider your approach in a more clear state of mind.
Sincerely,
Andrew