Back and forth across the Colorado river
OMG has it been really no posts since April? Wow I suck at blogs.
So I did move to San Diego. For a month. In the hindsight, it was like running away from problems instead of solving them.
The gravity pull of too much unfinished business and family left behind, combined with the fact that the new job I got in SD was nothing to write home about , made coming back an easy and logical choice. Far from ideal situation, because returning feels too much like a failure, but living there all alone, unemployed, was really, really depressing. In the first few days it was so bad I had to alleviate the depression chemically - I have a couple of things prescribed such as Xanax but I haven't needed it for so long it's 2 years past expiration date - though I was very mindful of the habit-forming potential. So it was a very careful alternating rather than a mix of Xanax, Fiorinal, alcohol and Benadryl, plus Jeff Buckley's New Year's Prayer, which was somehow the only song I could tolerate in that horrible week. Other than calling home 2-3 times daily, I resisted the urge to reach out to anyone, because I felt I should try and survive on my own. Unfortunately I couldn't break the lease early, so I'll be paying for the empty studio in North Clairemont for a few months. Such is the price of mistakes.
Tuesday was a night out at the Rhythm Room - a Black Heart Procession gig. It was great to see Pall again. What a sweet person, one of the most benign human beings I've met, it's always a heartwarming experience no matter what we talk about. How ironic that while in San Diego, riding a bus (route105) I passed just yards of his residence twice but I was too steeped in misery at the time to even notice. The band has a really good rhythm section, finally (hell, why did I start thinking of the River-era Terry Reid band line up?...because Terry's rhythm section at the time also improved? damn bunny trails!) and they just started a full-on US tour and then a European leg in December. Wow, that's a lot of work, seems pretty exhausting.
I need to pick a new mobile service provider because I only have a week before my current cell phone becomes a paperweight. Along with the cell phone number, of course. I wouldn't do a thing but Qwest is dropping their mobile service, so I have no choice.
So I did move to San Diego. For a month. In the hindsight, it was like running away from problems instead of solving them.
The gravity pull of too much unfinished business and family left behind, combined with the fact that the new job I got in SD was nothing to write home about , made coming back an easy and logical choice. Far from ideal situation, because returning feels too much like a failure, but living there all alone, unemployed, was really, really depressing. In the first few days it was so bad I had to alleviate the depression chemically - I have a couple of things prescribed such as Xanax but I haven't needed it for so long it's 2 years past expiration date - though I was very mindful of the habit-forming potential. So it was a very careful alternating rather than a mix of Xanax, Fiorinal, alcohol and Benadryl, plus Jeff Buckley's New Year's Prayer, which was somehow the only song I could tolerate in that horrible week. Other than calling home 2-3 times daily, I resisted the urge to reach out to anyone, because I felt I should try and survive on my own. Unfortunately I couldn't break the lease early, so I'll be paying for the empty studio in North Clairemont for a few months. Such is the price of mistakes.
Tuesday was a night out at the Rhythm Room - a Black Heart Procession gig. It was great to see Pall again. What a sweet person, one of the most benign human beings I've met, it's always a heartwarming experience no matter what we talk about. How ironic that while in San Diego, riding a bus (route105) I passed just yards of his residence twice but I was too steeped in misery at the time to even notice. The band has a really good rhythm section, finally (hell, why did I start thinking of the River-era Terry Reid band line up?...because Terry's rhythm section at the time also improved? damn bunny trails!) and they just started a full-on US tour and then a European leg in December. Wow, that's a lot of work, seems pretty exhausting.
I need to pick a new mobile service provider because I only have a week before my current cell phone becomes a paperweight. Along with the cell phone number, of course. I wouldn't do a thing but Qwest is dropping their mobile service, so I have no choice.
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