personal history statement

Dec 04, 2008 18:49

Hi. Me again. Sorry about that. This is for a school's personal history statement (argh). I've been putting off this application because I have no frigging clue what they want. Prompt is In an essay, discuss how your personal background informs your decision to pursue a graduate degree. Please include any educational, familial, cultural, economic, ( Read more... )

personal history statement

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Comments 18

zhukora1 December 5 2008, 01:04:17 UTC
I'll try to post something a little more in depth when I have more than a minute, so for right now I'll just say this ( ... )

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ashoka December 5 2008, 01:26:53 UTC
Yeah, I was worried it would look too sensational. Although it did drastically affect my views on education, I think it might be naturally too melodramatic to include at all. Thanks for the honesty!

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wee_devil December 5 2008, 02:23:47 UTC
Yay! Another lesbian applying to grad school ( ... )

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ashoka December 5 2008, 03:27:27 UTC
Those tips are actually very helpful. Ugh, I can't believe the personal history has been the hardest part of the app so far... I usually love talking about myself! Thank you for commenting - I agree with you about everything - and wish you good luck with your applications, too. :)

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wee_devil December 5 2008, 03:32:49 UTC
The personal statement has been by far the hardest part for me too. And mine's for an app that's due tomorrow. Ugh. I'll probably be posting it on here for feedback in a little bit.

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ashoka December 5 2008, 03:52:55 UTC
I'll look forward to reading it!

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iluvrob20 December 5 2008, 02:26:23 UTC
i'm not sure the powerful lesibian arguement holds. I mean i want to see more strong powerful jewish women or black women or single moms in office and academia and medicine. I dont know if its just a sexual orientation thing. But I do understand what you're saying so don't think its a homophobia thing or anything.

However I do like the whole holy jesus education transition into more secular. Could you find a character from Ancient Greece/Classics that you could compare your story/your friends to for a little grounding maybe? For example, in my (8 millionth edit) SOP i am talking about a solider i met and weaving his story into factors from my own life and my desire to become a social worker.

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ashoka December 5 2008, 03:29:40 UTC
But this is a diversity statement, so it would be fair to say that you want to see more strong Jewish women or black women in academia. They are underrepresented in those fields. As are lesbians.

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iluvrob20 December 5 2008, 03:49:37 UTC
good point. i over looked the diversity statement part my bad! I thought it was just a general SOP.

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ashoka December 5 2008, 03:57:55 UTC
No problem! Yeah, if it weren't a diversity statement and if it weren't this particular school, I wouldn't go this route. Being gay really isn't that big of a deal to me.

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blueskysrain December 5 2008, 03:45:04 UTC
I love it, and I will be posting my "I'm LGBT and applying to Berkeley" diversity statement in this community later tonight possibly.

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ashoka December 5 2008, 03:59:04 UTC
Hahaha, oh, Berkeley. I almost wish it weren't so big on diversity, then we wouldn't have to write these damn things! I'll look forward to seeing yours, if this comm's main page actually decides to load for me.

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blueskysrain December 5 2008, 04:45:25 UTC
I'm going to see someone on campus tomorrow, so I may not upload it, but I'll definitely pm it to you.

-BSR

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dialogicdude December 5 2008, 15:02:08 UTC
This is really well written; a powerful, articulate, compelling personal statement. I have only a couple of minor editorial points to suggest:

- I also wish to further diversity in America, which along with the rest of the world walks a tightrope between security and intolerance.

Why did you leave out the commas after "which" and "world"? I'd put them in--

(And, by the by, this is a good observation--well said.)

- The questions and comments that I have received about my sexuality are not anything I would want a child of mine, should they be gay, to have to face.I see this all the time, and I'm sure at least someone will roll his or her eyes and say, "Oh, dear, it's the Grammar Police again." Well, let one say what one will--the fact is, this over-use (mis-use) of the 3rd person plural pronoun ("they") for an indefinite, singular person, really needs to stop in our common usage. Thus: "...I would want a child of mine, should she or he be gay..." One person (a child) cannot be grammatically identified/modified with a plural ( ... )

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