More Cleaing Out
I'm a lucky guy. I've got friends who were willing to go through the stuff that was left and set aside, sort it out, price it, and come and run a garage sale yesterday. Even more, they were cool with it that I wasn't up for being here for the sale to take place. I'd started stressing out about it Friday evening, knowing it was coming up. It was hard to get to sleep, and I woke up earlier than I had wanted or intended yesterday. I wanted to be anywhere but here. I think Archon was most accurate when he said the last thing I need right now is to watch people paw through my dead wife's stuff.
More luck was having friends who were willing to go out and do stuff with me in the morning and then let me hang out at their place in the afternoon. They were cool with putting in a movie and having me doze off for part of it. They were willing to bake up some pizza to have something to eat. They put in episodes of Red Dwarf and kept it going even though it wasn't the favorite of one of them. They didn't mind when I wanted to step out for a smoke and make or take a call.
They got a lot sold off. The rest got inventoried and donated to a local charity (the Mormon equivalent of the Salvation Army). It's gone. I haven't been out to the garage yet. That's where it was getting piled up for the sale. I think I'll give it another couple days before I do that. Even just thinking about so much of her stuff going was hard. It brought up her loss really hard again. There's been so much of finishing up her affairs and clearing out her stuff, it's hard to not feel that sense of deep loss and pain all over again. I know I haven't seen her in coming up on four months, but somethings things like that just bring it home really, REALLY hard all over again. Not too surprising, I'm exhausted now.
There are still some things to be disposed of. Her books are likely going to get donated to the public library. A friend said she'd sell them, but so far the local used book stores she'd talked to aren't much interested in buying used books, much less that many of them. There's some of her clothes left and some other things that for various reasons didn't make it out to the garage sale. Over time, those will have to go, too. I'm hoping that doing those a bit at a time will be easier to take. The only really big one I can see coming up like that will be moving out of the house.
I guess it's not too surprising that this sometimes still feels so surreal.
More luck was having friends who were willing to go out and do stuff with me in the morning and then let me hang out at their place in the afternoon. They were cool with putting in a movie and having me doze off for part of it. They were willing to bake up some pizza to have something to eat. They put in episodes of Red Dwarf and kept it going even though it wasn't the favorite of one of them. They didn't mind when I wanted to step out for a smoke and make or take a call.
They got a lot sold off. The rest got inventoried and donated to a local charity (the Mormon equivalent of the Salvation Army). It's gone. I haven't been out to the garage yet. That's where it was getting piled up for the sale. I think I'll give it another couple days before I do that. Even just thinking about so much of her stuff going was hard. It brought up her loss really hard again. There's been so much of finishing up her affairs and clearing out her stuff, it's hard to not feel that sense of deep loss and pain all over again. I know I haven't seen her in coming up on four months, but somethings things like that just bring it home really, REALLY hard all over again. Not too surprising, I'm exhausted now.
There are still some things to be disposed of. Her books are likely going to get donated to the public library. A friend said she'd sell them, but so far the local used book stores she'd talked to aren't much interested in buying used books, much less that many of them. There's some of her clothes left and some other things that for various reasons didn't make it out to the garage sale. Over time, those will have to go, too. I'm hoping that doing those a bit at a time will be easier to take. The only really big one I can see coming up like that will be moving out of the house.
I guess it's not too surprising that this sometimes still feels so surreal.