A Good Place
I start my new job tomorrow. It's a legal internship at at a non-profit organization that represents transgendered individuals, and I'm abnormally excited to get there bright-and-early to meet everyone and get to work! Law school has been somewhat disappointing, but the actual legal WORK has been awesome. I really like helping people by getting them access to services they need, and by generally helping them to exercise their civil rights. I also like stickin' it to assholes who violate peoples' rights. Go figure--righteous indignation = fuel! Not much of a shock, actually, eh?
Anyway, I'm in a particularly pensive mood tonight, as it's been exactly two years since I've moved into this apartment, and to Brooklyn (from Manhattan). It's been exactly one year since Grace moved out to go into the Peace Corps, and it's one week before my new friend and soon-to-be-roommate, Aubrey, moves in.
I also did some yoga today, screwed up my back, and took a rather intense muscle relaxer to kill the pain, so I'm in a rather...*interesting* mood!
I realized tonight, though, that I'm actually ecstatic about where my life is right now. I love my friends--both new and old, I'm pleased that I'm getting a law degree (2/3 done!), I'm excited about the direction of my legal career, I'm THRILLED about the start of my photography business, and I love making art and playing music.
I am actually and truly happy for the first time in a very, very long time. And ya know, I sort of can't believe it! I mean...I set out in January to achieve balance between school and fun, between legal and artistic work, balance in all senses and aspects of my life. I didn't really think it was going to happen, though; I didn't think I could do it--but I actually HAVE done it! I didn't disappoint myself, I didn't screw it up, I made it happen. Granted, there was a lot of luck and many amazing friends involved in this, but still...it's happened, I have balance, and I'm HAPPY.
I guess what I really wanted to say (though I'm being very inarticulate in doing so at the moment) is that for once, I'm going to pat myself on the back and say, "Well done, self. Nice job."
But, really, it's not just happiness, it's HOPE for the future, for what will happen, for this feeling to continue and grow. I'm also acutely aware of the fact that I can't now screw this up, hah!
So, I'm off to bed--tomorrow, my new job begins and, hopefully, my happiness continues.
Anyway, I'm in a particularly pensive mood tonight, as it's been exactly two years since I've moved into this apartment, and to Brooklyn (from Manhattan). It's been exactly one year since Grace moved out to go into the Peace Corps, and it's one week before my new friend and soon-to-be-roommate, Aubrey, moves in.
I also did some yoga today, screwed up my back, and took a rather intense muscle relaxer to kill the pain, so I'm in a rather...*interesting* mood!
I realized tonight, though, that I'm actually ecstatic about where my life is right now. I love my friends--both new and old, I'm pleased that I'm getting a law degree (2/3 done!), I'm excited about the direction of my legal career, I'm THRILLED about the start of my photography business, and I love making art and playing music.
I am actually and truly happy for the first time in a very, very long time. And ya know, I sort of can't believe it! I mean...I set out in January to achieve balance between school and fun, between legal and artistic work, balance in all senses and aspects of my life. I didn't really think it was going to happen, though; I didn't think I could do it--but I actually HAVE done it! I didn't disappoint myself, I didn't screw it up, I made it happen. Granted, there was a lot of luck and many amazing friends involved in this, but still...it's happened, I have balance, and I'm HAPPY.
I guess what I really wanted to say (though I'm being very inarticulate in doing so at the moment) is that for once, I'm going to pat myself on the back and say, "Well done, self. Nice job."
But, really, it's not just happiness, it's HOPE for the future, for what will happen, for this feeling to continue and grow. I'm also acutely aware of the fact that I can't now screw this up, hah!
So, I'm off to bed--tomorrow, my new job begins and, hopefully, my happiness continues.