(no subject)
No doubt tonight will produce further druggy introspection as I am still in pain and can't focus to work on book stuff. Went to the bank today and did my annual "no all of these rates are terrible put that HERE I want free money" conversation with the branch manager, also went to health food shop and bought delightful crap and to a swank deli and bought other crap and here is a meme:
Three names I go by
* Del (stopgap option, genderless and inoffensive, not preferred)
* Derek (preferred)
* Mr Pig (interchangeable pet name between self and boyfriend; both address each other with variations thereon, no one can really remember how this began)
Three places I lived
* London
* Plymouth
* Frome
Three places I have worked
* Capita
* BPP
* UoL
Three things I love to watch
* Hairy Bikers
* Jessica Jones (this is very tiring and requires a lot of attention)
* Anything David Attenborough is narrating.
Three places I have been
* Lund
* Bergen
* Malmo
Three things I love to eat
* Okonomiyaki
* Tonkotsu Ramen
* Tuna mustard onigiri (all onigiri but tuna mustard especially)
Three people I think will respond
* no one
* uses
* livejournal
Three favourite drinks
* Tea
* Really gay cider drinks
* Even gayer cocktails
Three things I am looking forward to
* Testosterone
* Tattoo
* Time off work again preferably with added bath.
My body is tired. Period (unwanted, too soon) is also very bad this time which, outside of the usual concerns associated with that (disgusting, painful, draining, dysphoria-inducing) is also making me worried/upset about how efficacious the remaining T-gel sachets are and setting off a whole chain of concern regarding how my body will react to higher doses (will it try to convert them into oestrogen and make me MORE feminine), and making life horrible for me re: bathrooms again, and generally making it unpleasant and upsetting to think about the future.
Which is an ongoing problem in and of itself because I used at least to take a certain amount of comfort in vaguely fantasising about a time when things would be better but now it's just like a constant hair shirt of "but WHEN?!?!?!?!".
Three names I go by
* Del (stopgap option, genderless and inoffensive, not preferred)
* Derek (preferred)
* Mr Pig (interchangeable pet name between self and boyfriend; both address each other with variations thereon, no one can really remember how this began)
Three places I lived
* London
* Plymouth
* Frome
Three places I have worked
* Capita
* BPP
* UoL
Three things I love to watch
* Hairy Bikers
* Jessica Jones (this is very tiring and requires a lot of attention)
* Anything David Attenborough is narrating.
Three places I have been
* Lund
* Bergen
* Malmo
Three things I love to eat
* Okonomiyaki
* Tonkotsu Ramen
* Tuna mustard onigiri (all onigiri but tuna mustard especially)
Three people I think will respond
* no one
* uses
* livejournal
Three favourite drinks
* Tea
* Really gay cider drinks
* Even gayer cocktails
Three things I am looking forward to
* Testosterone
* Tattoo
* Time off work again preferably with added bath.
My body is tired. Period (unwanted, too soon) is also very bad this time which, outside of the usual concerns associated with that (disgusting, painful, draining, dysphoria-inducing) is also making me worried/upset about how efficacious the remaining T-gel sachets are and setting off a whole chain of concern regarding how my body will react to higher doses (will it try to convert them into oestrogen and make me MORE feminine), and making life horrible for me re: bathrooms again, and generally making it unpleasant and upsetting to think about the future.
Which is an ongoing problem in and of itself because I used at least to take a certain amount of comfort in vaguely fantasising about a time when things would be better but now it's just like a constant hair shirt of "but WHEN?!?!?!?!".