(Untitled)

[apiphile]

Comments

[myselftheliar]

<3

[wolfy_writing]

I thought it was obvious that you were having your brain spring nastiness on you, and it was harder on you than on anyone else. It doesn't make sense to think you're being insincere or manipulative.

("Manipulative" is one of those words which is really easy to twist into something nastily dismissive, because normal human interaction includes a certain amount of "I want this from you, and I will behave in ways that make it so you want to and/or feel you should give it to me", and there's no universally agreed-upon line between communicating about problems and being manipulative. In America, there are even Christian Fundamentalists who say babies are manipulative for crying. So it's easy to turn it into "You are never allowed to express that you have problems or feelings."

[apiphile]

I had no idea my mother had so much in common with Christian Fundamentalists...

So it's easy to turn it into "You are never allowed to express that you have problems or feelings."

And lo, invalidation which leans to Borderline.

[wolfy_writing]

Yeah, the last thing you need is more invalidation.

[miscellanny]

♥

[myselftheliar]

There are people I know that need to see this, may I quote you or this unquoted or idk something.

[apiphile]

I'd prefer unquoted. The people I wanted to see this won't see it, because they don't LJ, and I am too paranoid to point them at it! FAIL.

[myselftheliar]

But is it cool then if I send this to someone who doesn't know you and just say "a friend wrote this"

[apiphile]

Yes, entirely.

[marika_kailaya]

it is very difficult to survive when your entire mindscape can change hour by hour (from "disinterested vague suicidal notion" to "you offhandedly made a vague generalization and now i have to kill myself because my brain just exploded in fear, hatred, and despair"). there have been situations where a single phrase causes me to spend the next six hours sobbing and trying to remove my own flesh. this week, i mean. i don't know if it's worth coping with either.

<3 you're a good del.

[apiphile]

One of those "I am glad someone knows what it feels like but sad that you have to know" moments.

there have been situations where a single phrase causes me to spend the next six hours sobbing and trying to remove my own flesh.

Ah yes. :(