Again Today
The Bree crush situation is resolved. I needed to tell her, told her and got the reaction that I expected. And then she told me about her summer of hookups with awful guys, her French fling and her making out with a mutual friend who was in a relationship at the time. She played dumb about not knowing that, but it was the same reason she hadn't done so a few months earlier when we last hung out.
Oh yeah. And she lied to me twice about when she left for the abroad program, first telling me that she left the day before she did and then contradicting that twice by telling me of her meeting up with said mutual friend.
And really, I can't be friends with someone who devalues herself in the way she's been doing lately. And how does it make me feel when she's totally fine with making out with strangers in France, having sex with douchebags in Alaska every summer, but tells me that we can't date because she doesn't date friends.
And the Emilee situation? If you're one of the three mutual friends that I share with her, you *really* get far more about this situation than you need be. Facebook is nosy, so your feed shows you every flirty comment and every status update she leaves on my page. Want to see more? Stop by my MySpace page. What can I tell you? Well, what day do you want me to tell you about? The three days this week where we had perfectly civil conversations or the two days in which we fought it out either on the phone or via Facebook chat? Seriously, we spent almost all day communicating, and from about 5-7:30 was absolute hell with her flying off the handle over my, "I'm not ready for anything more at this time" that came as I was trying to leave to tonight's movie night.
I think the thing that made me the most mad was how she has continuously over the last month questioned my sincerity, claming that guys who usually treat her like this are only in it for a makeout. After not only insisting that I wasn't that type of guy but wasn't looking for anything physical with her, she was still weary. "Fine" I concluded. "She has an issue trusting me." When she hit me with her you, "just fed me the same stuff i've heard a million times before two weeks before being dumped or something" and lumped me in with every other guy who has faked sincerity and treated her awful, I was done. That was until she flew off the handle (I even saved that little gem of the text transcript) when I mentioned that things had moved too fast and were now out of control for about the fourth time today.
And how angry am I that she hung up on me at that moment? I loudly repeated the word "fuck" a half dozen times in unison with pounding both fists on my metal computer desk. Being hung up on makes me *so* mad which led to an unfortunate drive to movie night.
I touched on this a little bit today, but only went over bits and pieces of today's battle. It's all scratching the surface. It didn't touch on how irrational she was. It didn't touch on how hard I tried to give her my side of the story. I didn't dare delve into the conversations we had about what'd happen when she actually comes back next month and of the flirtation that had been going on. Or how when I was realistic about the distance and religion factor for the fifteenth time she said, "the door is closed" between us.
It's an ongoing saga, and it changes daily. Really, if you want to know about either the Bree or Emilee situation, just ask. You know how bad I am at gushing without prompting, and I have no problem telling you everything. Though if you wait until next weekend, things will have likely changed about three or four times.