Paint Nite 10 (Santa Monica Pier), a fic, a meme and long worries about Two

[aome]

There's never that much to report, really. Kids go to school, I hound Two about doing his PT correctly and his math accurately (he understands the concepts for both those things. It's the quality that needs work), I go to the store once a week and smaller errands occasionally, and I started sewing on the quilt remake I'm doing for my SIL's bday (

Comments

[spiffikins]

I wonder if this is part of what I consider his spectrum-related issues

Ohhhh - I was reading along, thinking, "Gee Two sounds JUST LIKE my brother D, I wonder if he is on the spectrum or has been diagnosed with ADHD?"

My brother D - who is both - is EXACTLY like this and has been since he was a kid. TV commercials? He is their PRIME target - it doesn't matter what it is, if he sees a commercial for it, it becomes an obsession and he WANTS it.

We had to hide the toy flyers and catalogs - he would spend hours reading them and come to us with a list of all the things he couldn't live without - even if he'd never heard of them, until he saw the shiny pictures.

And he's the worst for wasting money - he will buy something - a book or game or poster or whatever - and then lose interest in it nearly immediately.

But yeah - the big thing is not reading closely - and never reading the fine print - which is weird in some ways, because he is otherwise SUPER observant and will notice all kinds of things. But if it's something he wants, those details are suddenly irrelevant, I guess?

[aome]

Yeah, I get a lot of "I've always wanted to try..." when what he means is "I've seen it advertised recently and I want to try..." He never obsessed quite as much as it sounds like your brother did, but, yeah - he is the one who is quick to accept whatever is being claimed, and to trust blindly. (Which is odd because he really does NOT trust people - although that's more because he's trans.) But I swear he would also have been the perfect "Come help me look for my puppy, I have candy" victim, no matter how many times we told him otherwise.

The reading thing is tough, though - even when he DOES try to read, only certain phrases jump out and he misses the rest, which often means he's getting the opposite meaning. I don't know how to help protect him from being scammed or otherwise spending money on things he doesn't actually want, but THINKS he does, because of misinterpretations or Oooh, Shiny reactions.

Oh, and yes, I think Two might have some ADD in there, as well (I've thought that since preschool), but it's never been enough to be disruptive in class so nobody has ever demanded he be tested. We've thought about it, but Two already feels he has so much "wrong" with him - gender, learning disability, adopted - that he has protested against being tested for spectrum or ADD issues, even though we've tried to tell him he can use that information to help him understand himself better. Yes, we could force him, as his parents, to undergo the testing, but at what cost?

[spiffikins]

But I swear he would also have been the perfect "Come help me look for my puppy, I have candy" victim

Ohhh yeah - I hear you :) When my brother entered high school, there were 2 special ed classrooms - he was initially put in with the "behavior modification" kids - and he lasted about a week, before the teacher called my mom and said "you need to get him OUT of this classroom - he is naive and the other kids will eat him alive" - he was already being identified as "the kid we can get to do things because he trusts people".

So he ended up being put in with the kids who had major processing issues and were intellectually limited - but were generally nice kids. It was a much better fit for him, socially, but the academic expectations were not so awesome.

but Two already feels he has so much "wrong" with him

I can totally see his point - and tbh, if he's anything like my brother, navel-gazing and introspection are not skills that he excels at - so really, unless the diagnosis comes with a prescription drugs that will help him concentrate, and make a demonstrable improvement, or gives the teachers a label that will allow them to work with him differently or give him accomodations - it probably won't benefit him much, and if he's already feeling like he's got enough labels - I can see it not being worthwhile.

One of the things my brother has going for him, is that he's pretty laid back - we didn't make a big deal about his diagnoses - he was NEVER allowed to say "I can't do that because I have ADHD" for example - that didn't fly with my mom :D But also things just sort of roll off his back - he exists is a pretty happy "present" and doesn't really worry about the past or the future. Drives me absolutely nuts :) but it's good for him :D