Paint Nite 10 (Santa Monica Pier), a fic, a meme and long worries about Two
There's never that much to report, really. Kids go to school, I hound Two about doing his PT correctly and his math accurately (he understands the concepts for both those things. It's the quality that needs work), I go to the store once a week and smaller errands occasionally, and I started sewing on the quilt remake I'm doing for my SIL's bday (in July - it's a time-consuming project). I exercise - running and weights - but I'm not doing great with TKD on my own. I've mainlined way too much Alex/Henry fic from Red, White & Royal Blue. We're all just ... surviving.
Oh, but I did also write my own Alex/Henry fic, squeezing it in just under the wire for
story_works' April "new fandom" challenge: It All Begins When...
Have another Quarantine Meme, courtesy of spiffikins:
When was the last time you left your home?
Yesterday - I did a run to the bagel place to pick up some ordered-by-phone breakfast sandwiches for the fam.
What was the last thing you bought?
Mother’s Day flowers for my mom, to be delivered on Fri.
Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed?
Kinda both? I mean, I have very little scheduled in my day so that’s kind of relaxing, but then being stuck with my in-laws all day every day is driving me insane.
Who are you spending quarantine with?
Husband, two teens, BIL, SIL, FIL, four cats (having lost Angel last week) and a dog.
Do you have pets to keep you company?
See above. Five of them. And I’m thankful for the furry company, even if they are badly behaved at times.
What are your current responsibilities?
Feed the family Mon-Fri, supervise Two’s math homework and his physical therapy, go grocery shopping, other minor tasks and errands as they occur.
Do you have a room to yourself?
Nope.
Are you exercising?
Yes. I haven’t been doing as well with TKD from home, though. I really really need my dojong, and I miss everyone terribly.
Town, country, city?
My official town is very very small, and I can be in rural horse country in 2 minutes, but within a 10 min drive I can also be in a much larger town.
How’s your toilet paper supply?
Right now, it’s good, and I’ve seen TP at BJs the last 2 times I’ve gone so this may be easing up a little? My SIL even got a medium-sized package of her favorite brand (Quilted Northern) last week at WalMart.
What’s the worst thing that you had to cancel?
Austria.
What’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel?
Well, I don’t have to drag Two down to CHOP today for his semi-annual checkup - it’s a telehealth appointment instead.
Who do you miss the most?
Librarians, TKD people.
Do you have any new hobbies?
Paint Nite (virtual).
What are you watching the most?
Agent Carter. Alas, that will end soon. Why did it get cancelled after just 2 seasons??
Are you still going to work?
Nope. Can’t substitute teach when teachers are able to teach all the time from home, even when they or family members are under the weather.
What are you out of?
I was out of yeast, but I was thankfully able to find some online. I’m almost out of bread flour (but we do have regular flour). It remains to be seen whether or not we can stay stocked up on meat in the coming weeks. We have some stockpiled but that will eventually get eaten.
Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine?
Nope. Thankfully, my hair is tolerant of going long periods between haircuts. It’s longer than I’d normally wear right now, because it had *already* been awhile since my last haircut when everything shut down, but I don’t otherwise look any different.
I did one more Paint Nite (afternoon) on Sunday - the Santa Monica pier. Here's the website model.
I've been wanting to do this one for ages - my aunt and uncle live within walking distance of the Pier, and took us there when we visited in 2009. Since they both have spring birthdays, I thought it would make a nice gift. Unfortunately, initially it was only being offered "live" (and in CA) - the virtual events were scheduled up to a point, and then people were planning live events again. As the lockdown continued and virtual events got extended, the live event versions of this painting disappeared - clearly, whoever was offering them wasn't willing or able to do them remotely. But, at last, at last, someone in NY offered it via virtual events, and I immediately signed up. (This is the painting I used my rebook code for, from my first virtual event that I missed back in late March.)
Here was the teacher's model:
Not quite as vibrant, but pretty close. The teacher was a huge bubble of energy - I liked her. Unfortunately, we had a kid as one of the students, a 10-year-old. The painting WAS offered to anyone age 6+ but the kid moved really slowly and her mom was constantly asking the teacher to slow down. The teacher was doing her best to balance wanting to support the slower kid, vs trying to keep to the schedule and allowing the rest of us to move on. Unfortunately, about halfway through the kid got frustrated and dropped out. I felt bad for both her and the teacher, but it was also kind of a relief to just move on and not have to keep stopping.
As is frequently the case, we started by marking the horizon line, and then we moved on to paint the medium and lighter blues in the corner:
Next we put in the orange, pinks, purples and yellows in the sky. I was pretty happy with how this was turning out, although, looking back at the original, the light blue at the beginning was a little bit too light. It matched the teacher's work but not the original.
I admit I went ahead and painted the water while the teacher was trying to help the kid catch up. I had a hard time incorporating the right color purple into the water, though, and spent way too much time fussing with it. :-P One change the teacher made, trying to simplify the painting a little, was turn the multi-colored land patch on the bottom right corner into something more understandably sand-colored. And I used the paper-towel technique I learned from spiffikins' Paint Nites to blot on some waves crashing on the shore, which was my own addition.
The teacher took some time explaining what we were going to do to paint the pier details by doing it first on some scrap paper, which she encouraged us all to do, and that was helpful. I used the bottom of a cup to trace the Ferris wheel, to make it a perfect circle, but I painted the extra rims and such on the wheel by hand, so those are a little more wonky. ;-) The final bits were adding the moon in the corner, and using the *end* of the brush (the part you normally hold in your hand) to dot on a) the stars and b) the lamplights. I have no idea if this really is how the pier looks at sunset, in silhouette, but overall I'm pretty pleased with the result.
My uncle's birthday was in April and my aunt's birthday is next week, so I'm going to try to get this into the mail soon and have ordered a frame from Amazon to be shipped to them, so they don't have to worry about getting one, and I don't have to worry about carefully packing anything to avoid breakage.
Sigh. As of two minutes ago, schools in NJ have been officially declared closed for the rest of the year. It's not a surprise, but it's still disappointing. :( :(
Oh, and speaking of school: Two decided not to attend the culinary votech program next year, sigh. Here's the thing: he's always been dragging his feet a little bit on the idea of the culinary votech program. I think this is partly because it was his second choice (graphic design was full) and also because he wants to stay at the high school full time. He keeps saying he likes the classes he picked and doesn't want to have to drop half of them (the electives, of course) but I think it's also because this way he doesn't have to do something new and scary. But, whatever. I'm okay with him ditching the idea BUT only if he's showing me he's starting to make concrete alternative plans. That have a chance of working out. He's ending his sophomore year - time is getting short. So, last week, when he said he thought he might just finish high school the ordinary way and THEN go to culinary school, I told him he had to research culinary schools and their admission requirements so that IF there was some requirement - like a GPA, or certain classes - he would know NOW, and not when he was a senior. And I made it clear that this was HIS job, as it's HIS future, not mine.
He spent a little time to look up some programs, deciding that baking/pastry school sounded more fun than regular cooking school which, ok, that's fine. The facts he wrote down for me weren't entirely helpful and I reminded him that, in addition to getting facts like where the schools were and what they offered, he needed to find out the admission requirements because he was CONVINCED there wouldn't be any, that they'd just take anyone. He did eventually find a page that he handed to me to read (fine, at least then he's getting accurate information); this particular school - it's in Chicago - said it did need a HS transcript and 2 letters of recommendation. Which, agreed, isn't too bad. But. I pointed out that this meant he needed to work hard and put in effort, if he wanted to get good letters of recommendation from someone. It didn't have to be a relevant subject or even one he'd done super-well in, but one where he'd shown EFFORT, where he showed the teacher he was trying to do better, and willing to go that extra mile. Given that he's not EVER willing to do that, this should be interesting. MiniPlu piped in - when Two was complaining that I was making him do the research - that I made HER do her own research into colleges, and she also pointed out that one of her letters of recommendation was from a science teacher (last year's anatomy teacher, I think) - which was NOT a subject she liked or felt good at, but she'd asked lots of questions and asked for extra help when needed, and that had impressed the teacher. Not sure if it helped at all to have his big sister butt in but it did at least reinforce the point I was making. I keep pointing out to Two that he doesn't have to ask questions in person (or, in this case, on live Google Meet) but can email teachers. That's fine. I don't care how he does it. You don't know why you got a B on an art project? Ask! Then you'll know what to do better next time. You thought you did really well on a math test and you didn't? Ask to see it, so you can see what sort of mistakes you made. Will he do it? Of course not. But this is the kind of stuff that makes teachers want to write you recommendations - you're trying.
Of course, he could get a letter of recommendation from an employer, too - if the world ever becomes safe enough for him to go out and get a job. And he worked hard. But his response to up his game is always the same, regardless of whether it's to do a better job cleaning his room or correcting his homework. "It doesn't matter." And no amount of head-banging seems to help.
He also seems to think if he wants to go to college later that he won't be held to the same standards of admission as if he went straight out of high school. I pointed out that this was NOT the case, and if he, say, picked a school that needed a year more of science than he got, or whatever, he'd have to take those classes at community college FIRST, and THEN try to get in.
I don't know why we can't get to him, why nothing we say makes any difference. It's frustrating, and it's scary.
And then there's the fact that he's a marketing sucker, and his reading issues mean he's not good at reading the fine print - he usually doesn't bother, or he misses stuff when he DOES bother. He's often showing me stuff he wants to buy and I'll take a closer look and point out something he didn't notice. Like - he was showing me a couple of journal-style sketchbooks that were a good price on Amazon and I pointed out they were only 4.5x7" (11.5x17.7cm) big - in other words, tiny. He's also recently gotten obsessed with some program he's found online that promises "shredded" abs, currently on sale for "only" $20 - which, ok, isn't a zillion dollars or anything - but I keep pointing out there are plenty of ab workouts he can find online for free, especially right now when even MORE is being made available online for free than usual. "But it's not an entire *system*." Don't care. When I can't get you to do your PT completely correctly without arguing, then you're not ready for a system that demands 100% adherence (including food) for results. He keeps pointing out the "before and after" photos on their advertisement website, and he is literally the target sucker that marketing firms dream of. I'm not saying this program is a hoax, but he doesn't understand that of course they're going to highlight the handful of people who got the promised results. The program even states that the vast majority of people don't stick 100% to a program (any program) and that's why they don't get results. I told Two to find a bunch of other different FREE ab workouts on the internet (different ones, so he can switch things up and feel like it's a "system") and stick to those, 100%, for two weeks, then come back and find me.
But it's stuff like this, plus the fact that he likes to spend money on a regular basis (food, stuffies, earbuds, other items) make me seriously worry about his ability to stay afloat in his adulthood. He is going to fall for every marketing claim, he's going to buy stuff without reading the fine print (he recently bought some earbuds for a decent price - I mean, I put in the order but he picked it out and paid me back) thinking they were wireless earbuds when they weren't. They were the same *brand* as a pair of wireless earbuds he already owned, so he assumed they were all wireless. But, again, he hadn't properly read the descriptive fine print) and no matter how much we remind him he needs to do this, and try to point out marketing schemes, he doesn't seem to get it. Again, I wonder if this is part of what I consider his spectrum-related issues. MiniPlu, at least, understands and recognizes when she's being pulled in by marketing ploys; in fact, she'll joke about it.
Just. Ugh. I look at my unemployed BIL/SIL down in NC, constantly out of money, and I see that he's going to be just like them, despite his grand schemes and dreams. And I feel like nothing we say or do makes any difference.
Oh, but I did also write my own Alex/Henry fic, squeezing it in just under the wire for
story_works' April "new fandom" challenge: It All Begins When...
Have another Quarantine Meme, courtesy of spiffikins:
When was the last time you left your home?
Yesterday - I did a run to the bagel place to pick up some ordered-by-phone breakfast sandwiches for the fam.
What was the last thing you bought?
Mother’s Day flowers for my mom, to be delivered on Fri.
Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed?
Kinda both? I mean, I have very little scheduled in my day so that’s kind of relaxing, but then being stuck with my in-laws all day every day is driving me insane.
Who are you spending quarantine with?
Husband, two teens, BIL, SIL, FIL, four cats (having lost Angel last week) and a dog.
Do you have pets to keep you company?
See above. Five of them. And I’m thankful for the furry company, even if they are badly behaved at times.
What are your current responsibilities?
Feed the family Mon-Fri, supervise Two’s math homework and his physical therapy, go grocery shopping, other minor tasks and errands as they occur.
Do you have a room to yourself?
Nope.
Are you exercising?
Yes. I haven’t been doing as well with TKD from home, though. I really really need my dojong, and I miss everyone terribly.
Town, country, city?
My official town is very very small, and I can be in rural horse country in 2 minutes, but within a 10 min drive I can also be in a much larger town.
How’s your toilet paper supply?
Right now, it’s good, and I’ve seen TP at BJs the last 2 times I’ve gone so this may be easing up a little? My SIL even got a medium-sized package of her favorite brand (Quilted Northern) last week at WalMart.
What’s the worst thing that you had to cancel?
Austria.
What’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel?
Well, I don’t have to drag Two down to CHOP today for his semi-annual checkup - it’s a telehealth appointment instead.
Who do you miss the most?
Librarians, TKD people.
Do you have any new hobbies?
Paint Nite (virtual).
What are you watching the most?
Agent Carter. Alas, that will end soon. Why did it get cancelled after just 2 seasons??
Are you still going to work?
Nope. Can’t substitute teach when teachers are able to teach all the time from home, even when they or family members are under the weather.
What are you out of?
I was out of yeast, but I was thankfully able to find some online. I’m almost out of bread flour (but we do have regular flour). It remains to be seen whether or not we can stay stocked up on meat in the coming weeks. We have some stockpiled but that will eventually get eaten.
Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine?
Nope. Thankfully, my hair is tolerant of going long periods between haircuts. It’s longer than I’d normally wear right now, because it had *already* been awhile since my last haircut when everything shut down, but I don’t otherwise look any different.
I did one more Paint Nite (afternoon) on Sunday - the Santa Monica pier. Here's the website model.
I've been wanting to do this one for ages - my aunt and uncle live within walking distance of the Pier, and took us there when we visited in 2009. Since they both have spring birthdays, I thought it would make a nice gift. Unfortunately, initially it was only being offered "live" (and in CA) - the virtual events were scheduled up to a point, and then people were planning live events again. As the lockdown continued and virtual events got extended, the live event versions of this painting disappeared - clearly, whoever was offering them wasn't willing or able to do them remotely. But, at last, at last, someone in NY offered it via virtual events, and I immediately signed up. (This is the painting I used my rebook code for, from my first virtual event that I missed back in late March.)
Here was the teacher's model:
Not quite as vibrant, but pretty close. The teacher was a huge bubble of energy - I liked her. Unfortunately, we had a kid as one of the students, a 10-year-old. The painting WAS offered to anyone age 6+ but the kid moved really slowly and her mom was constantly asking the teacher to slow down. The teacher was doing her best to balance wanting to support the slower kid, vs trying to keep to the schedule and allowing the rest of us to move on. Unfortunately, about halfway through the kid got frustrated and dropped out. I felt bad for both her and the teacher, but it was also kind of a relief to just move on and not have to keep stopping.
As is frequently the case, we started by marking the horizon line, and then we moved on to paint the medium and lighter blues in the corner:
Next we put in the orange, pinks, purples and yellows in the sky. I was pretty happy with how this was turning out, although, looking back at the original, the light blue at the beginning was a little bit too light. It matched the teacher's work but not the original.
I admit I went ahead and painted the water while the teacher was trying to help the kid catch up. I had a hard time incorporating the right color purple into the water, though, and spent way too much time fussing with it. :-P One change the teacher made, trying to simplify the painting a little, was turn the multi-colored land patch on the bottom right corner into something more understandably sand-colored. And I used the paper-towel technique I learned from spiffikins' Paint Nites to blot on some waves crashing on the shore, which was my own addition.
The teacher took some time explaining what we were going to do to paint the pier details by doing it first on some scrap paper, which she encouraged us all to do, and that was helpful. I used the bottom of a cup to trace the Ferris wheel, to make it a perfect circle, but I painted the extra rims and such on the wheel by hand, so those are a little more wonky. ;-) The final bits were adding the moon in the corner, and using the *end* of the brush (the part you normally hold in your hand) to dot on a) the stars and b) the lamplights. I have no idea if this really is how the pier looks at sunset, in silhouette, but overall I'm pretty pleased with the result.
My uncle's birthday was in April and my aunt's birthday is next week, so I'm going to try to get this into the mail soon and have ordered a frame from Amazon to be shipped to them, so they don't have to worry about getting one, and I don't have to worry about carefully packing anything to avoid breakage.
Sigh. As of two minutes ago, schools in NJ have been officially declared closed for the rest of the year. It's not a surprise, but it's still disappointing. :( :(
Oh, and speaking of school: Two decided not to attend the culinary votech program next year, sigh. Here's the thing: he's always been dragging his feet a little bit on the idea of the culinary votech program. I think this is partly because it was his second choice (graphic design was full) and also because he wants to stay at the high school full time. He keeps saying he likes the classes he picked and doesn't want to have to drop half of them (the electives, of course) but I think it's also because this way he doesn't have to do something new and scary. But, whatever. I'm okay with him ditching the idea BUT only if he's showing me he's starting to make concrete alternative plans. That have a chance of working out. He's ending his sophomore year - time is getting short. So, last week, when he said he thought he might just finish high school the ordinary way and THEN go to culinary school, I told him he had to research culinary schools and their admission requirements so that IF there was some requirement - like a GPA, or certain classes - he would know NOW, and not when he was a senior. And I made it clear that this was HIS job, as it's HIS future, not mine.
He spent a little time to look up some programs, deciding that baking/pastry school sounded more fun than regular cooking school which, ok, that's fine. The facts he wrote down for me weren't entirely helpful and I reminded him that, in addition to getting facts like where the schools were and what they offered, he needed to find out the admission requirements because he was CONVINCED there wouldn't be any, that they'd just take anyone. He did eventually find a page that he handed to me to read (fine, at least then he's getting accurate information); this particular school - it's in Chicago - said it did need a HS transcript and 2 letters of recommendation. Which, agreed, isn't too bad. But. I pointed out that this meant he needed to work hard and put in effort, if he wanted to get good letters of recommendation from someone. It didn't have to be a relevant subject or even one he'd done super-well in, but one where he'd shown EFFORT, where he showed the teacher he was trying to do better, and willing to go that extra mile. Given that he's not EVER willing to do that, this should be interesting. MiniPlu piped in - when Two was complaining that I was making him do the research - that I made HER do her own research into colleges, and she also pointed out that one of her letters of recommendation was from a science teacher (last year's anatomy teacher, I think) - which was NOT a subject she liked or felt good at, but she'd asked lots of questions and asked for extra help when needed, and that had impressed the teacher. Not sure if it helped at all to have his big sister butt in but it did at least reinforce the point I was making. I keep pointing out to Two that he doesn't have to ask questions in person (or, in this case, on live Google Meet) but can email teachers. That's fine. I don't care how he does it. You don't know why you got a B on an art project? Ask! Then you'll know what to do better next time. You thought you did really well on a math test and you didn't? Ask to see it, so you can see what sort of mistakes you made. Will he do it? Of course not. But this is the kind of stuff that makes teachers want to write you recommendations - you're trying.
Of course, he could get a letter of recommendation from an employer, too - if the world ever becomes safe enough for him to go out and get a job. And he worked hard. But his response to up his game is always the same, regardless of whether it's to do a better job cleaning his room or correcting his homework. "It doesn't matter." And no amount of head-banging seems to help.
He also seems to think if he wants to go to college later that he won't be held to the same standards of admission as if he went straight out of high school. I pointed out that this was NOT the case, and if he, say, picked a school that needed a year more of science than he got, or whatever, he'd have to take those classes at community college FIRST, and THEN try to get in.
I don't know why we can't get to him, why nothing we say makes any difference. It's frustrating, and it's scary.
And then there's the fact that he's a marketing sucker, and his reading issues mean he's not good at reading the fine print - he usually doesn't bother, or he misses stuff when he DOES bother. He's often showing me stuff he wants to buy and I'll take a closer look and point out something he didn't notice. Like - he was showing me a couple of journal-style sketchbooks that were a good price on Amazon and I pointed out they were only 4.5x7" (11.5x17.7cm) big - in other words, tiny. He's also recently gotten obsessed with some program he's found online that promises "shredded" abs, currently on sale for "only" $20 - which, ok, isn't a zillion dollars or anything - but I keep pointing out there are plenty of ab workouts he can find online for free, especially right now when even MORE is being made available online for free than usual. "But it's not an entire *system*." Don't care. When I can't get you to do your PT completely correctly without arguing, then you're not ready for a system that demands 100% adherence (including food) for results. He keeps pointing out the "before and after" photos on their advertisement website, and he is literally the target sucker that marketing firms dream of. I'm not saying this program is a hoax, but he doesn't understand that of course they're going to highlight the handful of people who got the promised results. The program even states that the vast majority of people don't stick 100% to a program (any program) and that's why they don't get results. I told Two to find a bunch of other different FREE ab workouts on the internet (different ones, so he can switch things up and feel like it's a "system") and stick to those, 100%, for two weeks, then come back and find me.
But it's stuff like this, plus the fact that he likes to spend money on a regular basis (food, stuffies, earbuds, other items) make me seriously worry about his ability to stay afloat in his adulthood. He is going to fall for every marketing claim, he's going to buy stuff without reading the fine print (he recently bought some earbuds for a decent price - I mean, I put in the order but he picked it out and paid me back) thinking they were wireless earbuds when they weren't. They were the same *brand* as a pair of wireless earbuds he already owned, so he assumed they were all wireless. But, again, he hadn't properly read the descriptive fine print) and no matter how much we remind him he needs to do this, and try to point out marketing schemes, he doesn't seem to get it. Again, I wonder if this is part of what I consider his spectrum-related issues. MiniPlu, at least, understands and recognizes when she's being pulled in by marketing ploys; in fact, she'll joke about it.
Just. Ugh. I look at my unemployed BIL/SIL down in NC, constantly out of money, and I see that he's going to be just like them, despite his grand schemes and dreams. And I feel like nothing we say or do makes any difference.