Stop and Stare
since I'm an idiot and can't cut... ignore this, just some personal thoughts.
I'm so sad. Mainly, because I'm losing the one person I love the most. But I have given up so much for him, and sometimes I just feel like he's not here. He doesn't see everything I do most of the time and thinks he's doing it all, then deflects that on me when I say I'm doing most of it... which I feel like I am.
Then, I'm asked if he should forgive me. If you have to ask and I'm so bad like that, than no, you don't need to our should want to forgive me.
Because of his stupid pride and my stubbornness, I fear I'm losing my best friend.
He took his pillow in the middle of the night last night, and laid down on the couch,, and the second the door closed closed, I woke to an empty bed with out his pillow. It makes me sad. He came back in an hour before my slam went off. I guess I'm not supposed to notice that he's doing that. I don't know.
I do know that I'm so sad, and that he can't stand to be near me anymore. And all he ever is, is angry. I just want to cry all the time.
We used to be so good, we were the best of friends. But now, I don't know what happened. He used to be cuddled, but much with me anymore, but I'm told that's my fault.
I feel like I'm on my own. Like there's no one there anymore. Like I'm lost and can't find my way back.
Sometimes, I just wish I could disappear...
I'm so sad. Mainly, because I'm losing the one person I love the most. But I have given up so much for him, and sometimes I just feel like he's not here. He doesn't see everything I do most of the time and thinks he's doing it all, then deflects that on me when I say I'm doing most of it... which I feel like I am.
Then, I'm asked if he should forgive me. If you have to ask and I'm so bad like that, than no, you don't need to our should want to forgive me.
Because of his stupid pride and my stubbornness, I fear I'm losing my best friend.
He took his pillow in the middle of the night last night, and laid down on the couch,, and the second the door closed closed, I woke to an empty bed with out his pillow. It makes me sad. He came back in an hour before my slam went off. I guess I'm not supposed to notice that he's doing that. I don't know.
I do know that I'm so sad, and that he can't stand to be near me anymore. And all he ever is, is angry. I just want to cry all the time.
We used to be so good, we were the best of friends. But now, I don't know what happened. He used to be cuddled, but much with me anymore, but I'm told that's my fault.
I feel like I'm on my own. Like there's no one there anymore. Like I'm lost and can't find my way back.
Sometimes, I just wish I could disappear...