Regret

[antwan2005]

I wish I had kept better record of things in the past. I just feel like I did a poor job chronicling all the things I wish I had now. At the time, it seemed like it was none of anyone's business but I wish I had at least recorded things in a private entry or something. All the little squabbles I had or small fights. What they were about who said

Comments

[antwan2005]

Yeah, I have no idea. I'm sure it is a little of all of those as I don't think you can do any of them until you are trying to do all of them. The big trigger for all of this was probably talking to Mark but in some way or another I have been thinking about all of this all along. This isn't the first time I have decided to write this script after all and the reflection on these ideas hasn't really changed the core story so much as just reminded me of a lot of things and allowed me to review with a much more critical eye (God I made some really stupid choices).
For the record, pouring over the old journals and their comments just led me to the knowledge that you tried your best and were right all along. Thank you for trying at least, with both Kira and Mandy, and point out to me I was wrong. I am working on another script, except for the stage and not film, that is sort of about that. Not being able to understand something someone tells you and being forced to experience it yourself.
I am actually pretty glad you are reading Live Journal right now randomly because as important as it was to get all of that out I am even more relieved someone read it. It means a lot.
I miss you tons Zoe! Do you guys have plans tomorrow evening (Wednesday)? Perhaps we could get together and just hang out. Nothing money intensive but it would be nice to catch up some.