i know it seems odd how i feel about porn in my relationship and still not be anti-porn. but keep in mine my hubby was a porn addict and was severly abusive to me because of his addiction, that;s why our relationship only began to get better after he decided to stop looking at it completely or just with me.
i beleive that one thing will never apply to everyone because everyone is different. the amount of love and respect you have for someone will determine how your relationship goes. most people like me {sexual abuse victims} are anti-porn and beleive it is horrible. lol, for a long time i was anti-porn until i started to have a more open mind. abuse can leave alot of physical, mental, and emotional scars. i have all three. i can accept other people looking at it.
Would like to mention that I was subjected to my own sexual abuse between the ages of 7 all the way to about 10. I am defiantly not anti-porn, and never found it to horrible. Though I also dealt with the issues of my childhood by myself, and only saw a shrink about it by the time I was graduating Highschool. He found my views, and attitude to be amazing that I was able to actually move foward by myself. My mother though, always thought I was screwed up and unable to get a proper relationship when she actually was having relationship problems herself.
So not everyone who is sexually abused, find themselves to be anti-porn. It really depends on the person and how they deal with it afterwards.
I have met a few poeple who aren't anti-porn and have been abused but the majority i know who have been are anti-porn. my abuse took place about 15-17...i don't know about anytime before then except for one memory i can't get it out of my head. for some reason i can't remember that part of my childhood.
that didn't affect my views on porn until i wen throught the stuff with my husband. I just avoided looking at it with guys around. it never aroused me, i am the type of person who needs someone else there with me or it completely turns me off. the only way visual stimulation works is if it's an aid to physical by my hubby.
He hasn't looked at child porn in over a year now. it still frightens me that it may come back. He was seeing a coulsler for a while but was too ashamed to tell her he looked at it.
He hates counslers and therapists, has no faith in them at all. i feel the same way. We both have been labled as "crazy" or "skitzo" by poeple who dind't know thier head from thier ass. i personaly feel betrayed by the people who were suppose to be helping me. One had given me a medicine which even at 10 mg was dangerous for me and then upped it to 20 mg.
he isn't in AA anymore, it was just a requiremet of drugcourt. he stopped going because alot of them have said "once and addict always an addict" he didn't like being in such a negative environment and didn't like having to say he was a drug addict when he clearly wasn't.
my dad had a porn addiction and I've watched my mom just deteriorate. She spent thirty years in a marriage where her husband would rather jerk off while watching strangers fuck than make love to her. I'm sorry but there is nothing positive in pornography, I seriously looked everywhere to find out if there is any pro for it (scientifically, socially and psychologically).
there isn't anything positive IN pornography. i would like to beleive that any woman who says she doesn't care her if he So jacks off is just lying.
you are also right about there not being any pros to it in relationships. it has even been proven to hurt relationships yet alot of people deny it because the media force feeds them shit and they redily accept it. i know alot of people say it helps but that's ONLY if they watch it together and it's something they both like. the only type of "porn" that helped my sex life were the educational books for ideas and the educational dvds.
also some men claim it was thier sex education, that's probably why thier partners complain on myspace.com that thier sex life completely sucks. the only ideas my hubbs got from actual porn were either uncomfortable or painful.
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i beleive that one thing will never apply to everyone because everyone is different. the amount of love and respect you have for someone will determine how your relationship goes.
most people like me {sexual abuse victims} are anti-porn and beleive it is
horrible.
lol, for a long time i was anti-porn until i started to have a more open mind.
abuse can leave alot of physical, mental, and emotional scars. i have all three. i can accept other people looking at it.
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So not everyone who is sexually abused, find themselves to be anti-porn. It really depends on the person and how they deal with it afterwards.
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my abuse took place about 15-17...i don't know about anytime before then except for one memory i can't get it out of my head. for some reason i can't remember that part of my childhood.
that didn't affect my views on porn until i wen throught the stuff with my husband. I just avoided looking at it with guys around.
it never aroused me, i am the type of person who needs someone else there with me or it completely turns me off. the only way visual stimulation works is if it's an aid to physical by my hubby.
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He hates counslers and therapists, has no faith in them at all.
i feel the same way. We both have been labled as "crazy" or "skitzo" by poeple who dind't know thier head from thier ass. i personaly feel betrayed by the people who were suppose to be helping me. One had given me a medicine which even at 10 mg was dangerous for me and then upped it to 20 mg.
he isn't in AA anymore, it was just a requiremet of drugcourt. he stopped going because alot of them have said "once and addict always an addict" he didn't like being in such a negative environment and didn't like having to say he was a drug addict when he clearly wasn't.
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I'm sorry but there is nothing positive in pornography, I seriously looked everywhere to find out if there is any pro for it (scientifically, socially and psychologically).
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i would like to beleive that any woman who says she doesn't care her if he So jacks off is just lying.
you are also right about there not being any pros to it in relationships.
it has even been proven to hurt relationships yet alot of people deny it because the media force feeds them shit and they redily accept it.
i know alot of people say it helps but that's ONLY if they watch it together and it's something they both like.
the only type of "porn" that helped my sex life were the educational books for ideas and the educational dvds.
also some men claim it was thier sex education, that's probably why thier partners complain on myspace.com that thier sex life completely sucks.
the only ideas my hubbs got from actual porn were either uncomfortable or painful.
Reply
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