I am sorry for the things you have gone through. A couple questions I have out of concern for your saftey and your daughters. Has there been physical abuse in any way outside of the porn issue? Has it continued during other arguments you may have?
The most important thing is Is he getting help for any of these patterns. Patterns of addiction are very difficult for one to change on their own. If he is in AA he should know this. More so then just the addiction the fac thtat you brought up child porn really bothers me. For most viewers of child porn it is a pyschological compulsion. I think the reasons why he has been viewing this kind of material need to be explored and examined..if not that complusion is always going to be int he back of his head and while he may be able to control it for the time there could always be the chance of it re surfacing..especially since this is so fresh. I would highly suggest that both of you get counselling seperatly. You need someone to talk to about the pain you have been through and your panic attacks.
he needs someoene to talk to about ..well a lot.
I do believe in that human capacity for change although it is not an easy road I sincerely hope that he has been able to make a genuine change for both your sake.
He hasn't looked at child porn in over a year now. it still frightens me that it may come back. He was seeing a coulsler for a while but was too ashamed to tell her he looked at it.
He hates counslers and therapists, has no faith in them at all. i feel the same way. We both have been labled as "crazy" or "skitzo" by poeple who dind't know thier head from thier ass. i personaly feel betrayed by the people who were suppose to be helping me. One had given me a medicine which even at 10 mg was dangerous for me and then upped it to 20 mg.
he isn't in AA anymore, it was just a requiremet of drugcourt. he stopped going because alot of them have said "once and addict always an addict" he didn't like being in such a negative environment and didn't like having to say he was a drug addict when he clearly wasn't.
A couple questions I have out of concern for your saftey and your daughters.
Has there been physical abuse in any way outside of the porn issue? Has it continued during other arguments you may have?
The most important thing is Is he getting help for any of these patterns. Patterns of addiction are very difficult for one to change on their own. If he is in AA he should know this.
More so then just the addiction the fac thtat you brought up child porn really bothers me. For most viewers of child porn it is a pyschological compulsion. I think the reasons why he has been viewing this kind of material need to be explored and examined..if not that complusion is always going to be int he back of his head and while he may be able to control it for the time there could always be the chance of it re surfacing..especially since this is so fresh.
I would highly suggest that both of you get counselling seperatly.
You need someone to talk to about the pain you have been through and your panic attacks.
he needs someoene to talk to about ..well a lot.
I do believe in that human capacity for change although it is not an easy road I sincerely hope that he has been able to make a genuine change for both your sake.
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He hates counslers and therapists, has no faith in them at all.
i feel the same way. We both have been labled as "crazy" or "skitzo" by poeple who dind't know thier head from thier ass. i personaly feel betrayed by the people who were suppose to be helping me. One had given me a medicine which even at 10 mg was dangerous for me and then upped it to 20 mg.
he isn't in AA anymore, it was just a requiremet of drugcourt. he stopped going because alot of them have said "once and addict always an addict" he didn't like being in such a negative environment and didn't like having to say he was a drug addict when he clearly wasn't.
Reply
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