(no subject)
Daylight Savings Times ended (or began? I can never remember which, but at any rate, it's the Bad One, the Losing Daylight In The Evening one), and this marks the beginning of The Time of Year That Is Full of Epic Suck.
I sort of resent this since my mental health, normally stable except during the winter, has been all over the place for the last half-year- Hey, body, October through April's meant to be the time when the extra sunlight makes you deliriously happy! THIS ISN'T FAIR!- although I do know that it's useless to resent the earth's rotation and one's own brain chemistry.
This winter may not have to be full of despair. I'm running and swimming somewhat regularly, the combination of vitamins I was ordered to take at the beginning of the year have made me feel so much better, my caffeine consumption has been cut down, and I'm surrounded by awesome, vibrant people -both old friends who I'm really thankful to have around and a boyfriend who's excellent company and is impressively understanding and patient, and new friends that I'm looking forward to getting to know better. In addition to this, several people whose presence had become toxic are now out of my life, completely. I have a good variety of things to distract me from the diminishing daylight: more complicated and challenging knitting projects now that I'm no longer intimidated by sweaters, an ongoing Prime Time Adventures game which kicked off yesterday that I think it's going to be full of silliness and fun, my radio show, which has settled on a format that I think is really freakin' cool last night, and a LARP that a friend and I are tentatively planning.
Last of all, I've promised myself that if I have days where all I want to do is stay inside, bake bread, drink tea, and listen to the same music on repeat for hours on end because it makes me feel better than anything else has in a week, or wander around by the waterfront after dark, feeling dramatic and overly-serious, I'm going to do exactly that, and not stress about it.
I'll try not to get down on myself if I do crash, and to be honest, at some point, I probably will because that is what happens when you have SAD and it reaches the point in the year when you're exposed to less daylight. However, for the last few years, I've settled on a pattern of slowly feeling more and more horrible over a few weeks, crashing, spending a few days feeling miserable, then another few sorting myself out mentally, then being more or less stable for the rest of the winter as long as I ensure that I do certain things, and don't do certain others. I have what I think is reasonable hope that the feeling horrible part doesn't have to last as long as it has in years past, the crash doesn't have to be as hard, and the stable part will be stronger.
I'm going to pull some kumara-leek soup out of the freezer, then go to knitting once I've eaten. I'm looking forward to hot chocolate and working on my sweater in the company of friends.
I hope all of you are having a good night.
I sort of resent this since my mental health, normally stable except during the winter, has been all over the place for the last half-year- Hey, body, October through April's meant to be the time when the extra sunlight makes you deliriously happy! THIS ISN'T FAIR!- although I do know that it's useless to resent the earth's rotation and one's own brain chemistry.
This winter may not have to be full of despair. I'm running and swimming somewhat regularly, the combination of vitamins I was ordered to take at the beginning of the year have made me feel so much better, my caffeine consumption has been cut down, and I'm surrounded by awesome, vibrant people -both old friends who I'm really thankful to have around and a boyfriend who's excellent company and is impressively understanding and patient, and new friends that I'm looking forward to getting to know better. In addition to this, several people whose presence had become toxic are now out of my life, completely. I have a good variety of things to distract me from the diminishing daylight: more complicated and challenging knitting projects now that I'm no longer intimidated by sweaters, an ongoing Prime Time Adventures game which kicked off yesterday that I think it's going to be full of silliness and fun, my radio show, which has settled on a format that I think is really freakin' cool last night, and a LARP that a friend and I are tentatively planning.
Last of all, I've promised myself that if I have days where all I want to do is stay inside, bake bread, drink tea, and listen to the same music on repeat for hours on end because it makes me feel better than anything else has in a week, or wander around by the waterfront after dark, feeling dramatic and overly-serious, I'm going to do exactly that, and not stress about it.
I'll try not to get down on myself if I do crash, and to be honest, at some point, I probably will because that is what happens when you have SAD and it reaches the point in the year when you're exposed to less daylight. However, for the last few years, I've settled on a pattern of slowly feeling more and more horrible over a few weeks, crashing, spending a few days feeling miserable, then another few sorting myself out mentally, then being more or less stable for the rest of the winter as long as I ensure that I do certain things, and don't do certain others. I have what I think is reasonable hope that the feeling horrible part doesn't have to last as long as it has in years past, the crash doesn't have to be as hard, and the stable part will be stronger.
I'm going to pull some kumara-leek soup out of the freezer, then go to knitting once I've eaten. I'm looking forward to hot chocolate and working on my sweater in the company of friends.
I hope all of you are having a good night.