STOP IT!
I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE IN A SHACK IN THE MIDDLE OF BUTTFUCK EGYPT! YOU STOP PUTTING FOOD IN HIS ASS! BUTTER IS NOT LUBE! I SWEAR TO CHRIST. I HATE IT WHEN YOU USE SPIT FOR LUBE I FUCKING HATE IT. BUT I CANNOT ABIDE THIS. I WILL NOT TOLERATE JAMS, BUTTER, OR OTHER NON-LUBE THINGS AS LUBE....HOW HARD IS IT TO FIND LUBE...I HAVE AT LEAST THREE THINGS IN MY HOME THAT ARE CONCEIVABLE LUBE AND THERE IS CERTAINLY NO BUTTFUCKING GOING ON HERE. HE'S IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS LIVING ROOM. CERTAINLY A BOTTLE OF SOMETHING IS HANDY. IT'S A FUCKING CHEMIST AND A DOCTOR FOR CHRIST'S SAKE. IF IT'S SO HARD TO GET LUBE INTO THE STORY THEN JUST GIVE US SOME FROTTAGE AND BE DONE WITH IT. ALSO BUTTER BELONGS IN THE FRIDGE. THAT SAID I LOVE YOU AND YOUR STORY AND YOU ONLY GET THE CAPSLOCK POST DIRECTED AT YOU FOR BEING THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG. FUCKING HELL I WANT TOAST NOW.