decisions, decisions
Tomorrow I am going to talk with my principal about next year. I asked to meet with her because the 31st of this month is the last day to resign from my position at the school and retain my good standing with the credential people as well as retain insurance through the summer. I want to know what she is thinking. She placed me on a plan of support at the end of the year last year. At the beginning of this year she said I was doing great and that I was so much better than the year before. She seemed happy and pleased with all the progress I made. I had been teaching high school for 5 years and moving to an elementary school was a big adjustment. So I was surprised when she had a second meeting after winter break stating that she was putting me on a plan of improvement. This means that my job is in jeopardy. She had some strange things on the list that I really didn't get. A few things I could see might need to be worked on and I have done everything she asked. So I think that it depends on the day as to whether she likes me or not. Basically I need to know if she wants me to come back or not. I don't want to be stuck at the end of the year without a job. I would rather be prepared to move on if that's what I should do.
After thinking about it more I think maybe I really don't want to stay here anyway. I have no family here anymore. I think the dark cold nights of winter drove my sister to divorce her husband and mine left as well. I can't stay in a place that makes people crazy or depressed. Summers here are beautiful, but the winters are very hard. My children are also feeling the effects of the weather and isolation from family and friends. So, I am seriously thinking about moving back to CA, into a place where I knowI will probably be unemployed. This makes me a little uneasy, but I think the mental health of my family is more important that any job I might have. I have always gotten through difficult times and I am not afraid to be without money. I just don't think I can bare another winter here... I realize in life there really are no right or wrong decisions in terms of which road to travel, it is just different. I can try to stay here another year, but I feel it will be wasteful of a year of my life, as were the past few I have already endured here. I want the kids to know and grow up around their sister. She is, or at least was, a very big part of their lives; mine as well. Okay, so I will talk to the principal tomorrow, something that makes me uncomfortable on a normal day, so that I can begin to plan my new life, where ever it leads me... I do know that I want my life to be surrounded by happy, encouraging people. Ones who will not try to bring me down or make me feel bad. Wish me luck! :)
Yeah and I forgot how to do a LJ cut so you get to see it, all or nothing. lol
After thinking about it more I think maybe I really don't want to stay here anyway. I have no family here anymore. I think the dark cold nights of winter drove my sister to divorce her husband and mine left as well. I can't stay in a place that makes people crazy or depressed. Summers here are beautiful, but the winters are very hard. My children are also feeling the effects of the weather and isolation from family and friends. So, I am seriously thinking about moving back to CA, into a place where I knowI will probably be unemployed. This makes me a little uneasy, but I think the mental health of my family is more important that any job I might have. I have always gotten through difficult times and I am not afraid to be without money. I just don't think I can bare another winter here... I realize in life there really are no right or wrong decisions in terms of which road to travel, it is just different. I can try to stay here another year, but I feel it will be wasteful of a year of my life, as were the past few I have already endured here. I want the kids to know and grow up around their sister. She is, or at least was, a very big part of their lives; mine as well. Okay, so I will talk to the principal tomorrow, something that makes me uncomfortable on a normal day, so that I can begin to plan my new life, where ever it leads me... I do know that I want my life to be surrounded by happy, encouraging people. Ones who will not try to bring me down or make me feel bad. Wish me luck! :)
Yeah and I forgot how to do a LJ cut so you get to see it, all or nothing. lol