Better Things
I don't spend all of my time being anxious.
I spend a lot of time working on art, which actually is very soothing and satisfying all in one.
I also take the dogs for a walk everyday. I take them to trails that are a little bit more off the beaten path so that they can run free. And run they do. Basically I let them go where they want, and I know that in the end they'll meet me at the car. Well, I should mention that they are very good about "checking in" with me. If they go ahead on the trail, they'll wait at the bend until they see me round it. If they don't see me for a while, they'll trot back and make sure I'm still walking in the right direction.
Since they aren't attached to me with leashes, I've actually started jogging a bit. At first I could maybe go for 30 seconds and then I'd be totally winded. I'd run a few times for very short periods of time.
The past couple days I've noticed great improvement. Yesterday I only jogged twice during the whole walk/jog, but in both instances I went further and longer than I ever thought possible. It's cool because at first I'd set little goals for myself like, make it to that pool of standing water, or that tuft of grass ahead on the trail. Then if I'd get there I'd push myself just a bit further. Sometimes I'd be able to make 3 or 4 of these mini goals.
Yesterday I didn't set any goals. I just decided to focus and run until I felt like stopping. I kept going and going. I felt really quite proud at the end.
I've always been interested in fitness, and I've gone through periods when I work out regularly, but then there are times when I don't do much at all besides sit around. Granted, at times this is because of pure laziness, but I've also had good hunks of time in my life where my lower back issues prevented me from doing much of anything at all, let alone exercising.
So the fact that I've gone out everyday, and that I'm improving remarkably in my endurance feels amazing. I feel like I'm getting stronger and fitter, even just with the cardio, perhaps because when I run I focus on keeping a strong core to help stabilize my lower back so it doesn't get unexpectedly jostled. I'm looking into some drop in yoga classes here too which I know I'd enjoy. It feels good to feel good.
More good stuff is that I'm developing a little bit of a social life, finally. I've been feeling pretty isolated in general. I don't know too many people here, so I'm alone most of the time.
Thankfully, my friend Fran has popped back into the picture. She was away on travel for a couple weeks, but she got back this weekend, and invited me to meet up with her and some of her friends at brunch on Sunday. It was really fun. I ate some fantastic food and met some great people. Afterward we moved the party to a local beach where we went swimming and watched the sunset. I couldn't have asked for a better Sunday.
Yesterday she called me and invited me out to dinner. One of her friends is leaving Saipan, so it was a farewell affair. It was pretty low-key, but it was just nice to be around people; to have some conversations.
My brother will be getting back in a mere 10 days. I like him a lot, and we have a good time together, so it will be wonderful to have him around again.
Then just a week later jesnie arrives which will be fantastic, and then 4 days later we fly to Manila to meet up with mercurialdawn and her bf. It will be an epic trip, people. Epic.
Good times ahead, and I'm also making the most of my time right now. Although there are some things in the periphery that are making me feel kind of anxious and twitchy, I'm mostly focusing on the things that make me happy: the dogs, making art, fitness, and now, friends.
I spend a lot of time working on art, which actually is very soothing and satisfying all in one.
I also take the dogs for a walk everyday. I take them to trails that are a little bit more off the beaten path so that they can run free. And run they do. Basically I let them go where they want, and I know that in the end they'll meet me at the car. Well, I should mention that they are very good about "checking in" with me. If they go ahead on the trail, they'll wait at the bend until they see me round it. If they don't see me for a while, they'll trot back and make sure I'm still walking in the right direction.
Since they aren't attached to me with leashes, I've actually started jogging a bit. At first I could maybe go for 30 seconds and then I'd be totally winded. I'd run a few times for very short periods of time.
The past couple days I've noticed great improvement. Yesterday I only jogged twice during the whole walk/jog, but in both instances I went further and longer than I ever thought possible. It's cool because at first I'd set little goals for myself like, make it to that pool of standing water, or that tuft of grass ahead on the trail. Then if I'd get there I'd push myself just a bit further. Sometimes I'd be able to make 3 or 4 of these mini goals.
Yesterday I didn't set any goals. I just decided to focus and run until I felt like stopping. I kept going and going. I felt really quite proud at the end.
I've always been interested in fitness, and I've gone through periods when I work out regularly, but then there are times when I don't do much at all besides sit around. Granted, at times this is because of pure laziness, but I've also had good hunks of time in my life where my lower back issues prevented me from doing much of anything at all, let alone exercising.
So the fact that I've gone out everyday, and that I'm improving remarkably in my endurance feels amazing. I feel like I'm getting stronger and fitter, even just with the cardio, perhaps because when I run I focus on keeping a strong core to help stabilize my lower back so it doesn't get unexpectedly jostled. I'm looking into some drop in yoga classes here too which I know I'd enjoy. It feels good to feel good.
More good stuff is that I'm developing a little bit of a social life, finally. I've been feeling pretty isolated in general. I don't know too many people here, so I'm alone most of the time.
Thankfully, my friend Fran has popped back into the picture. She was away on travel for a couple weeks, but she got back this weekend, and invited me to meet up with her and some of her friends at brunch on Sunday. It was really fun. I ate some fantastic food and met some great people. Afterward we moved the party to a local beach where we went swimming and watched the sunset. I couldn't have asked for a better Sunday.
Yesterday she called me and invited me out to dinner. One of her friends is leaving Saipan, so it was a farewell affair. It was pretty low-key, but it was just nice to be around people; to have some conversations.
My brother will be getting back in a mere 10 days. I like him a lot, and we have a good time together, so it will be wonderful to have him around again.
Then just a week later jesnie arrives which will be fantastic, and then 4 days later we fly to Manila to meet up with mercurialdawn and her bf. It will be an epic trip, people. Epic.
Good times ahead, and I'm also making the most of my time right now. Although there are some things in the periphery that are making me feel kind of anxious and twitchy, I'm mostly focusing on the things that make me happy: the dogs, making art, fitness, and now, friends.