Back to Work
I have officially finished my first week back to work. Sitting here on the other side of the first week (versus stressing over it for weeks), it's not as horrific as I was anticipating. It was hard, don't get me wrong, probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do - ever - but it got easier as the week progressed.
Let me start on Sunday, though. I was stressing myself out so much just thinking about dropping Spencie off at daycare and just walking away, leaving him there, and then spending the next 8 hours without him while a nearly complete stranger took care of my kid. I made myself sick to my stomach, literally. I couldn't even eat.
Monday morning I was a wreck. I broke down at home while I was getting him ready to go, putting his jacket on, getting him in the car seat, etc. I just kept apologizing and telling him I'll miss him and that he'll be ok and that I love him. I gave him a million kisses. I cried on the drive to daycare, trying to control myself so I didn't make a huge spectacle at daycare. As soon as I got inside the daycare lady's house, I started crying again. The daycare mom hugged me and told me the first day is the hardest and that I can call her if I want. I am so glad that I filled out these sheets about Spencer, otherwise she wouldn't know anything about him, his likes/dislikes, how much he eats, how often, how he likes to be held, etc, because I couldn't even talk. I cried as I walked back to the car and I'm sure the other parents thought I was nuts. I cried on the car ride to work. I managed to get myself together before getting to work and I didn't cry the rest of the day.
I called the daycare at about 10:45 and I felt better afterwards. She said that Spencer was doing good, that he likes the other kids. He was smiling at them. He ate without any problems and was taking a 2+ hour nap.
When I got home from work, I devoured my baby. I hugged him and gave him so many kisses. I just ate him up. It was hard being away from him for so long. The worst part is knowing that some other woman gets to take care of my baby and witness the everyday little things I took for granted, like changing his diaper and feeding him, and making him smile and watching him try to discover the big wide world.
Spencer is having trouble adapting to the new routine and change of scenery. It's affecting his sleeping habits. He used to be a pretty good night sleeper. He's wake up every 3-4 hours, so only twice during the night. Now he wakes up about every half hour to hour. I am so freakin' tired! I guess he only takes little cat naps during the day, too. He's tired and cranky, too. He doesn't have a problem falling asleep. And once he's asleep, he'll stay asleep as long as I let him sleep on me or in the swing. As soon as I set him down in his bassinet, he wakes up, or sleeps for a half an hour to hour. He can't stay asleep once he's set down. Last night the week-long lack of sleep must have really wore him down, because he slept for a straight 4 1/2 hours! But then after my husband fed him and put him back to sleep, he woke up only a short half hour later. I can't wait for him to get adjusted to this new routine and start sleeping good again.
Once of my friends had a baby and I went to visit her today. Oh my goodness, the baby is tiny. So small! Spencer seems huge. He'll be 3 months old tomorrow and he's pretty little for his age, but this baby just seemed so little. I can barely remember when Spencer was that small.
Let me start on Sunday, though. I was stressing myself out so much just thinking about dropping Spencie off at daycare and just walking away, leaving him there, and then spending the next 8 hours without him while a nearly complete stranger took care of my kid. I made myself sick to my stomach, literally. I couldn't even eat.
Monday morning I was a wreck. I broke down at home while I was getting him ready to go, putting his jacket on, getting him in the car seat, etc. I just kept apologizing and telling him I'll miss him and that he'll be ok and that I love him. I gave him a million kisses. I cried on the drive to daycare, trying to control myself so I didn't make a huge spectacle at daycare. As soon as I got inside the daycare lady's house, I started crying again. The daycare mom hugged me and told me the first day is the hardest and that I can call her if I want. I am so glad that I filled out these sheets about Spencer, otherwise she wouldn't know anything about him, his likes/dislikes, how much he eats, how often, how he likes to be held, etc, because I couldn't even talk. I cried as I walked back to the car and I'm sure the other parents thought I was nuts. I cried on the car ride to work. I managed to get myself together before getting to work and I didn't cry the rest of the day.
I called the daycare at about 10:45 and I felt better afterwards. She said that Spencer was doing good, that he likes the other kids. He was smiling at them. He ate without any problems and was taking a 2+ hour nap.
When I got home from work, I devoured my baby. I hugged him and gave him so many kisses. I just ate him up. It was hard being away from him for so long. The worst part is knowing that some other woman gets to take care of my baby and witness the everyday little things I took for granted, like changing his diaper and feeding him, and making him smile and watching him try to discover the big wide world.
Spencer is having trouble adapting to the new routine and change of scenery. It's affecting his sleeping habits. He used to be a pretty good night sleeper. He's wake up every 3-4 hours, so only twice during the night. Now he wakes up about every half hour to hour. I am so freakin' tired! I guess he only takes little cat naps during the day, too. He's tired and cranky, too. He doesn't have a problem falling asleep. And once he's asleep, he'll stay asleep as long as I let him sleep on me or in the swing. As soon as I set him down in his bassinet, he wakes up, or sleeps for a half an hour to hour. He can't stay asleep once he's set down. Last night the week-long lack of sleep must have really wore him down, because he slept for a straight 4 1/2 hours! But then after my husband fed him and put him back to sleep, he woke up only a short half hour later. I can't wait for him to get adjusted to this new routine and start sleeping good again.
Once of my friends had a baby and I went to visit her today. Oh my goodness, the baby is tiny. So small! Spencer seems huge. He'll be 3 months old tomorrow and he's pretty little for his age, but this baby just seemed so little. I can barely remember when Spencer was that small.