uneasy lies the head
From AIM; cut for general lewdness and terrible abuse of iconography.
jucundushomo: so, are henry's bits messed up?
jucundushomo: you never told me, lea.
commodorified: no, but his head is
jucundushomo: which one?
jucundushomo: *is 12*
angevin2: not that henry's bits, tim. neither of them actually have messed-up bits, though ;)
commodorified: the big one.
commodorified: *slaps crap out of you preemptively*
angevin2: THE ONE UPSTAIRS
angevin2: uneasy lies the...oh, whatever
commodorified: NOT HIS WEDDING TACKLE
commodorified: *fnarf*
angevin2: an unfortunate appellation, considering
commodorified: NB CROWN OF ENGLAND NOT TO BE USED AS COCK RING
angevin2: for one thing, we assume it would be a very ineffective one
commodorified: By order, the Queen
angevin2: it's sort of a METAPHORICAL cock ring
commodorified: NB: BALM IS NOT LUBE
commodorified: (maybe that's why Richard can't get it off?)
jucundushomo: are we talking chapstick or Balm of Gilead
jucundushomo: or maybe the coronation chrism
commodorified: NB SCEPTRE IS NOT... oh. wait. it sort of IS.
commodorified: tim: the third.
commodorified: makes drinking communion wine look a bit tame, innit?
jucundushomo: chrism, for the record, really is amazing smelling.
angevin2: NB: WELL-SUITED AS IT MAY BE FOR THIS PURPOSE, THE SCEPTER MUST BE USED FOR CEREMONIAL THINGS TOO AND THUS MAY NOT BE INSERTED INTO INTERESTING PLACES, NO MATTER HOW MUCH FUN IT IS
angevin2: yeah, it is
commodorified: NB AT LEAST WASH IT AFTER RICHARD
angevin2: (i told you guys about "henry iv's extra-virgin oil" right?)
jucundushomo: HAHAHAHAHA
commodorified: NO!
commodorified: OMFG
angevin2: NB DISHWASHERS ARE NOT YET INVENTED, AND EVEN IF THEY WERE, THE SCEPTER IS NOT DISHWASHER SAFE
jucundushomo: *dies*
angevin2: this was the title of a chapter in a book called "tales from english history" or somesuch
commodorified: *writes on walls of Westminster*
angevin2: and i knew what it meant, but i still nearly swallowed my tongue
commodorified: we gotta post this dont' we?
angevin2: yeah, we probably do ;)
commodorified: lea, it's your job.
angevin2: oh, all right. first, let me get pajamafied
jucundushomo: earn your daily bread, woman!
angevin2: then i shall explain the extra-virgin oil
jucundushomo: w00t
...
angevin2: oh, also, the extra-virgin oil thing
jucundushomo: yes!
aris_tgd: I don't really need to know where you're inserting *that*...
angevin2: has to do with this story that got promulgated that late in richard's reign there was a vial of chrism found in the tower that was supposedly presented to thomas a becket by the virgin mary
angevin2: and that henry iv was the first king anointed with it
jucundushomo: right.
angevin2: and in the document that refers to it there's a marginal note that says something like "unguentum fictitium"
angevin2: so basically it's perfectly non-disgusting lancastrian propaganda
commodorified: NB 'FULL SERVICE" ANOINTING IS NOT PERMITTED
angevin2: except that the book in question, of course, makes it sound highly, highly disturbing.
angevin2: or maybe it's just my cesspit of a brain, whatever. ;)
(LJ-ify your IMs before pasting!)
jucundushomo: so, are henry's bits messed up?
jucundushomo: you never told me, lea.
commodorified: no, but his head is
jucundushomo: which one?
jucundushomo: *is 12*
angevin2: not that henry's bits, tim. neither of them actually have messed-up bits, though ;)
commodorified: the big one.
commodorified: *slaps crap out of you preemptively*
angevin2: THE ONE UPSTAIRS
angevin2: uneasy lies the...oh, whatever
commodorified: NOT HIS WEDDING TACKLE
commodorified: *fnarf*
angevin2: an unfortunate appellation, considering
commodorified: NB CROWN OF ENGLAND NOT TO BE USED AS COCK RING
angevin2: for one thing, we assume it would be a very ineffective one
commodorified: By order, the Queen
angevin2: it's sort of a METAPHORICAL cock ring
commodorified: NB: BALM IS NOT LUBE
commodorified: (maybe that's why Richard can't get it off?)
jucundushomo: are we talking chapstick or Balm of Gilead
jucundushomo: or maybe the coronation chrism
commodorified: NB SCEPTRE IS NOT... oh. wait. it sort of IS.
commodorified: tim: the third.
commodorified: makes drinking communion wine look a bit tame, innit?
jucundushomo: chrism, for the record, really is amazing smelling.
angevin2: NB: WELL-SUITED AS IT MAY BE FOR THIS PURPOSE, THE SCEPTER MUST BE USED FOR CEREMONIAL THINGS TOO AND THUS MAY NOT BE INSERTED INTO INTERESTING PLACES, NO MATTER HOW MUCH FUN IT IS
angevin2: yeah, it is
commodorified: NB AT LEAST WASH IT AFTER RICHARD
angevin2: (i told you guys about "henry iv's extra-virgin oil" right?)
jucundushomo: HAHAHAHAHA
commodorified: NO!
commodorified: OMFG
angevin2: NB DISHWASHERS ARE NOT YET INVENTED, AND EVEN IF THEY WERE, THE SCEPTER IS NOT DISHWASHER SAFE
jucundushomo: *dies*
angevin2: this was the title of a chapter in a book called "tales from english history" or somesuch
commodorified: *writes on walls of Westminster*
angevin2: and i knew what it meant, but i still nearly swallowed my tongue
commodorified: we gotta post this dont' we?
angevin2: yeah, we probably do ;)
commodorified: lea, it's your job.
angevin2: oh, all right. first, let me get pajamafied
jucundushomo: earn your daily bread, woman!
angevin2: then i shall explain the extra-virgin oil
jucundushomo: w00t
...
angevin2: oh, also, the extra-virgin oil thing
jucundushomo: yes!
aris_tgd: I don't really need to know where you're inserting *that*...
angevin2: has to do with this story that got promulgated that late in richard's reign there was a vial of chrism found in the tower that was supposedly presented to thomas a becket by the virgin mary
angevin2: and that henry iv was the first king anointed with it
jucundushomo: right.
angevin2: and in the document that refers to it there's a marginal note that says something like "unguentum fictitium"
angevin2: so basically it's perfectly non-disgusting lancastrian propaganda
commodorified: NB 'FULL SERVICE" ANOINTING IS NOT PERMITTED
angevin2: except that the book in question, of course, makes it sound highly, highly disturbing.
angevin2: or maybe it's just my cesspit of a brain, whatever. ;)
(LJ-ify your IMs before pasting!)