That whole "you live in a fantasy world" statement's startin' t'become accurate...
Maybe it's my lack of communication with pretty much everybody...maybe it's th'fact that i haven't gotten any contact at all (physically) in months...maybe it's th'fact that m'head's so much lighter now and i haven't adjusted....maybe it's th'fact that i have way too much time t'sit and think....
whatever th'case, i'm startin' t'lose m'self in daydreams...
o'course, i don't now if you can really call 'em DAYdreams considering it's always th'middle of th'night due to my workin' nights and shite....but i've had a few recurring ones (only one of these i can now remember with any degree of accuracy)...and one that kinda shocked me....y'see, it was me and th'other person...and we made out a bit....but there were a couple points to point out *prays he's not gonna get ribbed for this cuz he's wiggin' enough as it is*:
1) it was a vampire...so there was feeding afterwards (with me as the entree')...
2 it was a MALE vampire....
so...i don't know what t'chalk it up to, but i had m'first fantasy regarding a male....and no, don't read too much into it, i'm not gonna be playin' for the other team any time soon....i guess i'm just comfortable enough to admit that sexy is sexy no matter what form it's in....plus i mean c'mon, it was a vampire and you all know how i am about vampires...(and no, it wasn't anybody from Angel or Buffy or anything like that, this was an actual VAMPIRIC vampire, y'know what i mean?)...i'm still not sayin' who it was though, cuz it'd sound so cliche'd it's not funny...
the recurring ones are a lil' more familiar...familiar in th'sense of th'costars that're in 'em...th'one i had last night at work floored me...
we were in my room...but not in the room i live in now, the room i lived in years ago in that trailer in SC...she's been here before...and she looks just like i remember her....i'm sure her hair doesn't still look like this, she's told me as much, but it was now...she lies nude on my bed, flat on her back, looking up at me...i sit gently on her legs..nude from the waist up...this wasn't something i decided, she requested this....not to "heat up the moment", but she would feel more comfortable if i wasn't completely clothed, but to be nude myself would just make things awkward...this isn't a sexual experience, there's a reason she's like this...
I take my open hands and place them on the top of her head...my eyes are closed...my thumbs trace down the front of her face while my fingers lightly trace the sides of her head...my pinky fingers meet under her chin and i lift my hands up and trace back down her face tracing every contour, every soft line, like a sculptor molding her...but as i already know this body is flawless, there's no need for me to sculpt anything...
i now run my fingers down her neck, across her shoulders, down her smooth arms...her hands are open and laying palm down i take her hands in mine and flip them over, using each of my fingers to feel the detail of hers. I put my fingers together and run them back up her arms. She breathes in deeply at this...this wasn't supposed to be erotic but part of me knew i'd be pushing it if i messed with her arms...she always did have a spot there...i've known this for a while...hell, that's why i had that thumbring...that's why i grew out that nail i lost so long ago...
Now at her shoulders i trace back across her to meet in the middle of her body, and then proceed back downward...my eyes still closed as i feel her soft skin, tracing around her breasts, cupping them slightly in each hand for the sake of this activity, again i mean no advances with this. Regardless, she's either cold at this point or other things are goin' on with her that i can't read, for as i go even lower, down to her belly, i can feel the goosebumps on her skin.
I have to move to finish. My bed isn't long enough for me to get where i need to and us both be on it...that's fine...i stand up and lean over her...the angle makes the feeling a little more awkward but i manage to trace one hand down each of her smooth legs going outside on purpose because i want to make sure i have enough time to convince myself of what this is not intended for...as much as i promised myself, i do still hold a deep candle for her and fear that i may loose my composure once i meet the area which i knew all to briefly in times past...
now as i reach the bottom of her legs i hold her feet gently as i continue to run down each..she jumps a little here too...i didn't remember her being ticklish down there, but i know i am so i'm not surprised...i open my hands again and gently move her feet apart, just so i have enough room to place both my hands on the inside of her legs...my palms resting at the inside of her legs, my knuckles touching each other...i slowly slide up her legs, commiting every detail to memory...i leave one hand now at my side while the other is turned to gently stroke in between her thighs...despite my noble intentions she is slightly moist down there, and i have to fight back my hunger and stop, though the work wasn't finished...
like i said...weird huh? And even though in this fantasy i meant nothing sexual, you can imagine that havin' a beautiful girl nude in m'bed made for a lot of "must not touchy, must not touchy" type stuff...add this to th'fact that it left me with some other tension irl, and i have no way of releiving said tension right now, and this blows...oh well, it did make for some nice lil' memories...and hopefully i made my description vague enough to where nobody'll be 100% sure of who that is....i'm sure you all have your ideas, but hopefully there'll be different ones for everybody....cuz im' supposed to be done with this girl...
-Just a lil' trip inside my head...hope you enjoyed the ride...
whatever th'case, i'm startin' t'lose m'self in daydreams...
o'course, i don't now if you can really call 'em DAYdreams considering it's always th'middle of th'night due to my workin' nights and shite....but i've had a few recurring ones (only one of these i can now remember with any degree of accuracy)...and one that kinda shocked me....y'see, it was me and th'other person...and we made out a bit....but there were a couple points to point out *prays he's not gonna get ribbed for this cuz he's wiggin' enough as it is*:
1) it was a vampire...so there was feeding afterwards (with me as the entree')...
2 it was a MALE vampire....
so...i don't know what t'chalk it up to, but i had m'first fantasy regarding a male....and no, don't read too much into it, i'm not gonna be playin' for the other team any time soon....i guess i'm just comfortable enough to admit that sexy is sexy no matter what form it's in....plus i mean c'mon, it was a vampire and you all know how i am about vampires...(and no, it wasn't anybody from Angel or Buffy or anything like that, this was an actual VAMPIRIC vampire, y'know what i mean?)...i'm still not sayin' who it was though, cuz it'd sound so cliche'd it's not funny...
the recurring ones are a lil' more familiar...familiar in th'sense of th'costars that're in 'em...th'one i had last night at work floored me...
we were in my room...but not in the room i live in now, the room i lived in years ago in that trailer in SC...she's been here before...and she looks just like i remember her....i'm sure her hair doesn't still look like this, she's told me as much, but it was now...she lies nude on my bed, flat on her back, looking up at me...i sit gently on her legs..nude from the waist up...this wasn't something i decided, she requested this....not to "heat up the moment", but she would feel more comfortable if i wasn't completely clothed, but to be nude myself would just make things awkward...this isn't a sexual experience, there's a reason she's like this...
I take my open hands and place them on the top of her head...my eyes are closed...my thumbs trace down the front of her face while my fingers lightly trace the sides of her head...my pinky fingers meet under her chin and i lift my hands up and trace back down her face tracing every contour, every soft line, like a sculptor molding her...but as i already know this body is flawless, there's no need for me to sculpt anything...
i now run my fingers down her neck, across her shoulders, down her smooth arms...her hands are open and laying palm down i take her hands in mine and flip them over, using each of my fingers to feel the detail of hers. I put my fingers together and run them back up her arms. She breathes in deeply at this...this wasn't supposed to be erotic but part of me knew i'd be pushing it if i messed with her arms...she always did have a spot there...i've known this for a while...hell, that's why i had that thumbring...that's why i grew out that nail i lost so long ago...
Now at her shoulders i trace back across her to meet in the middle of her body, and then proceed back downward...my eyes still closed as i feel her soft skin, tracing around her breasts, cupping them slightly in each hand for the sake of this activity, again i mean no advances with this. Regardless, she's either cold at this point or other things are goin' on with her that i can't read, for as i go even lower, down to her belly, i can feel the goosebumps on her skin.
I have to move to finish. My bed isn't long enough for me to get where i need to and us both be on it...that's fine...i stand up and lean over her...the angle makes the feeling a little more awkward but i manage to trace one hand down each of her smooth legs going outside on purpose because i want to make sure i have enough time to convince myself of what this is not intended for...as much as i promised myself, i do still hold a deep candle for her and fear that i may loose my composure once i meet the area which i knew all to briefly in times past...
now as i reach the bottom of her legs i hold her feet gently as i continue to run down each..she jumps a little here too...i didn't remember her being ticklish down there, but i know i am so i'm not surprised...i open my hands again and gently move her feet apart, just so i have enough room to place both my hands on the inside of her legs...my palms resting at the inside of her legs, my knuckles touching each other...i slowly slide up her legs, commiting every detail to memory...i leave one hand now at my side while the other is turned to gently stroke in between her thighs...despite my noble intentions she is slightly moist down there, and i have to fight back my hunger and stop, though the work wasn't finished...
like i said...weird huh? And even though in this fantasy i meant nothing sexual, you can imagine that havin' a beautiful girl nude in m'bed made for a lot of "must not touchy, must not touchy" type stuff...add this to th'fact that it left me with some other tension irl, and i have no way of releiving said tension right now, and this blows...oh well, it did make for some nice lil' memories...and hopefully i made my description vague enough to where nobody'll be 100% sure of who that is....i'm sure you all have your ideas, but hopefully there'll be different ones for everybody....cuz im' supposed to be done with this girl...
-Just a lil' trip inside my head...hope you enjoyed the ride...