[Fanfic/One Shot] Just a Substitute?
Title: Just a Substitute?
Author: Angelteuki_13 / Nhei / KTmin13 (twitter | tumblr )
Characters: Donghae, Eunhyuk, Kibum
Pairings: Haehyuk, Kihae
Chapter: 1/1
Genre: Drama
Disclaimer: I only own the plot and ideas.
Author’s Note: I hope you like it.
Summary: Kibum’s back …what am I to you now?
Just a Substitute?
Kibum is back! - You announced from the other line.
R-really? That’s…great. - I answered, trying with all my might to sound like you, happy and excited. Kibum is my friend, too, and I should be happy from the news you’ve just announced. But how could I?
I’m going to see him now. I’ll call you again, Hyukkie! - You said almost instantly and hung up without giving me any chance to reply, or to at least tell you to take care.
I sighed but it wasn’t enough to make me feel at ease. Ignoring the pain in my heart, I walked out from the café after staying for three hours waiting to see even just your shadow to immerse from the door. You didn’t. But you called and it relieved me that something bad never happened to you even though the reason behind your call was what shattered my heart at the very moment. I was very worried, but I guess I don’t have to be anymore, do I? You were happy, maybe too happy that you forgot you asked me to meet you…because you said, you miss me. I don’t think so anymore.
Dark sky enveloped the whole city, I found myself walking along the dark, cold street. I liked the presence it gave me for it reflected exactly how I felt. Few steps more, I stopped and looked up seeing a door in front of me. I knocked.
“Hyukkie?” I heard Sungmin called me, peeking through the slightly ajar door. He gasped upon seeing the sadness I wasn’t able to hide, and quickly enveloped me in his arms, somehow, I felt warm by it and it comforted me. I couldn’t help but let the tears so eager to come out to fall.
“D-Donghae…he…K-Kibum…” I wanted to tell Sungmin all so bad, but the pain deprived me of voice that all I could do was cry and cry more.
“Oh, Hyukkie, I’m so sorry.” Sungmin said in soothing voice. I shook my head and embraced him to keep me from falling.
I woke up in the middle of the night with Sungmin peacefully sleeping beside me. He refused to let me be alone when I asked him I want to be, and I was too tired to protest. I hoped it was you who was here beside me, hugging me, and making me feel that I was loved by you. My heart constricted at the thought of you doing all I wish for to Kibum. But how can I complain? You’re not mine to keep to myself. I just became your special friend when Kibum left. I was just a substitute to your true special friend that is him.
He’s back …what am I to you now?
I spent the whole day on my bed inside my room because I didn’t want to disturb Sungmin more, and it only made me not forget you more even just for a minute. I didn’t want to think of you, anymore. I love you so much that it hurts seeing you in my mind, seeing your smile that was never for me.
I wrapped my arms around my knees, letting another batch of tears to fall. I really love you, Donghae.
Then, to my surprise, my door burst open and I looked up, seeing you standing there, panting and worry all over your face. I just stared at you as you stared back at me with eyes I can’t read. Every second passed with you staring at me, my broken heart beat faster I was worried it will be broken more into many tiny pieces. But it did not when you rushed towards me and suddenly pulled me in your arms. I wasn’t able to comprehend everything yet when I felt you…you were...kissing me.
And that was it. The world around us disappeared, leaving only you and me.
You were kissing me hard like I will be gone any moment. I was confused but I just let you because that was how I also felt. Your hands roamed around my body, making it warm in and out, while I held you tight. Then your one hand slipped inside my shirt and I gasped, unintentionally unlinking my mouth from yours but you quickly captured it again while your other hand worked on the belt of my jeans. My head spun and my mind became blurred.
What are you doing? After breaking my heart, you’ll come to me and do things we do only when you’re lonely? Am I being his substitute again? Am I being stupid again for letting you have your way like this?
“I’m sorry.” I heard you whispered and for a moment, I wondered if it was really you or it was just part of my hopeful imagination. You moved your lips to my cheek, then to my ear and whispered again, “I’m sorry. I won’t hurt you again. Kibum is a very special friend. And you…you are my entire life.”
Another batch of tears fell from my eyes but this time it was for a different reason. You saw my tears and kissed them away. You chuckled slightly and told me I was such a cry baby. I rubbed my eyes, trying to stop the tears from coming out. While doing so, I kept thinking how stupid I was for assuming things, for not trusting you enough, for being the weak I was. But you proved me wrong. And I am happy.
Donghae ah, I’m sorry and thank you.
I opened my eyes and met yours. You were showing those smiles I love so much.
And they are mine...finally.