(no subject)
I don't know why I even bother with this thing anymore...eh.
So what's happened in the past few weeks...let's see. I had an advising appointment and I've got my schedule all set up for next semester. I've just got to wait to register now. I'm excited because I'm really starting to get into major-only classes now, a few more classes and I'm done with all the stupid required classes. Oh, and apparently I'm an English minor now...go figure. But it's not like the English dept. here is challenging so a minor in English will be a breeze. I take half English classes anyway. It'll be helpful.
Fall break was last weekend. I did NOTHING. As fun as it was, it did get kinda boring. Most of it was spent with Chris. I had dinner with Timmy one night. Another night Lee made me dinner. That's just way too many boys in one weekend. Yikes. Good thing only one of them has the potential to be more than just friends. That'd be Chris. He came over last night and got the seal of approval from 1/3 of the approval committee. I'd have to take him to Jersey to get the rest. So we'll just assume he gets it. So yay for that. We've spent a lot of time together. He's 25, has a house and an obnoxious cat that's the size of a small dog, a degree in business administation, and works at the Honda dealership. Not bad. We had the dreaded "where are things going" conversation last night. I hate that conversation. And hey, guess what. I've managed to find yet ANOTHER guy who doesn't know what he wants. I think I attract them. Why is that? I don't understand how girls can know what they want and it takes guys months to figure it out. All I have to say is he's got until my birthday to figure out what he wants, and then I'm done with it. I'm not going to sit around and wait for yet another boy. I did that and only fucked not only the relationship up but I fucked myself up real bad.
Speaking of that other boy...
I haven't talked to him since he came to visit me. His away message says he got a house, I assume with his cousin. He did talk to me today to ask me about the viruses on my computer. ?? Because that makes sense. I just wish guys wouldn't tell me that after the relationship ends, we'll still talk. It's a load of bullshit. You're not going to talk to me unless you want to get something. You don't talk to me because you want to. You don't want to talk to me like you claimed. So why lead me on? Why have me around thinking that you might call, that I might get to talk to you? I'd rather be told I don't want anything to do to you then to wonder if you're ever going to call, if I'm ever going to hear from you. I dunno. It just sucks. It's just hard because, like, he's moving into this house, right? And that was something we talked about, how excited he was about it and stuff. And now it's happening and I'm not a part of it and it just makes me realize how not a part of his life I am anymore. It makes me wonder if he ever thinks about me or misses me or still cares about me.
I'm tired of going through boys to find a good one. Why is this so damn difficult? I had a good one. Rawr. Maybe things with Chris will work out. Maybe Paul will decide to forgive me. Maybe a steel beam will fall on my head and I won't have to think about this anymore.
Next weekend is halloween. Halloween in Greenville=massive amounts of parties. I don't want to party. I don't want to do any of it. I'm tempted to ask my dad for gas money so I can go to my grandparents house. If you want to find me next weekend, check my room. I'm not going out.
I have an english midterm tomorrow. And latin class. I want tomorrow to be over so it can be the weekend and I can curl up in bed and not move until monday morning. Or Chris' bed with the cat while he works on his stupid car. 1956 Chevy Belair. Boys and their cars...yikes.
I'm going to bed now. Screw studying.
So what's happened in the past few weeks...let's see. I had an advising appointment and I've got my schedule all set up for next semester. I've just got to wait to register now. I'm excited because I'm really starting to get into major-only classes now, a few more classes and I'm done with all the stupid required classes. Oh, and apparently I'm an English minor now...go figure. But it's not like the English dept. here is challenging so a minor in English will be a breeze. I take half English classes anyway. It'll be helpful.
Fall break was last weekend. I did NOTHING. As fun as it was, it did get kinda boring. Most of it was spent with Chris. I had dinner with Timmy one night. Another night Lee made me dinner. That's just way too many boys in one weekend. Yikes. Good thing only one of them has the potential to be more than just friends. That'd be Chris. He came over last night and got the seal of approval from 1/3 of the approval committee. I'd have to take him to Jersey to get the rest. So we'll just assume he gets it. So yay for that. We've spent a lot of time together. He's 25, has a house and an obnoxious cat that's the size of a small dog, a degree in business administation, and works at the Honda dealership. Not bad. We had the dreaded "where are things going" conversation last night. I hate that conversation. And hey, guess what. I've managed to find yet ANOTHER guy who doesn't know what he wants. I think I attract them. Why is that? I don't understand how girls can know what they want and it takes guys months to figure it out. All I have to say is he's got until my birthday to figure out what he wants, and then I'm done with it. I'm not going to sit around and wait for yet another boy. I did that and only fucked not only the relationship up but I fucked myself up real bad.
Speaking of that other boy...
I haven't talked to him since he came to visit me. His away message says he got a house, I assume with his cousin. He did talk to me today to ask me about the viruses on my computer. ?? Because that makes sense. I just wish guys wouldn't tell me that after the relationship ends, we'll still talk. It's a load of bullshit. You're not going to talk to me unless you want to get something. You don't talk to me because you want to. You don't want to talk to me like you claimed. So why lead me on? Why have me around thinking that you might call, that I might get to talk to you? I'd rather be told I don't want anything to do to you then to wonder if you're ever going to call, if I'm ever going to hear from you. I dunno. It just sucks. It's just hard because, like, he's moving into this house, right? And that was something we talked about, how excited he was about it and stuff. And now it's happening and I'm not a part of it and it just makes me realize how not a part of his life I am anymore. It makes me wonder if he ever thinks about me or misses me or still cares about me.
I'm tired of going through boys to find a good one. Why is this so damn difficult? I had a good one. Rawr. Maybe things with Chris will work out. Maybe Paul will decide to forgive me. Maybe a steel beam will fall on my head and I won't have to think about this anymore.
Next weekend is halloween. Halloween in Greenville=massive amounts of parties. I don't want to party. I don't want to do any of it. I'm tempted to ask my dad for gas money so I can go to my grandparents house. If you want to find me next weekend, check my room. I'm not going out.
I have an english midterm tomorrow. And latin class. I want tomorrow to be over so it can be the weekend and I can curl up in bed and not move until monday morning. Or Chris' bed with the cat while he works on his stupid car. 1956 Chevy Belair. Boys and their cars...yikes.
I'm going to bed now. Screw studying.