(no subject)
So, I guess I could for once externalize my thoughts/feelings in the form of words. Pocket and I broke up-which sucks. Things haven't been as amazing since he started his job at Outback, and I guess even a below zero camp out at Miller Stadium couldn't save it.
So basically I just feel like crap. I have given everything I have into this relationship, and now I have nothing left besides a huge hole. This is the time of the year that I would start getting really excited about my 21st birthday (my favorite time of the year)but I'm just not anymore.
I want to be angry, I want to curl up in a ball, I want to pretend nothing ever happened, or that maybe there is still a chance. But there is nothing left, and I refuse to sit and fill my hole with food, so I think I will just not eat and maybe I will feel better. At least then I can redirect the pain.
But in the end, no matter if our worlds have crashed down around us, the rest of the world keeps on moving-and so had I. It doesn't matter if he will regret it in the future, because we both know that I won't be there. The decision has been made.
One and a half years, the best ever, love you, miss you, like a pickle.
<3 Ponchka AKA Smalls
So basically I just feel like crap. I have given everything I have into this relationship, and now I have nothing left besides a huge hole. This is the time of the year that I would start getting really excited about my 21st birthday (my favorite time of the year)but I'm just not anymore.
I want to be angry, I want to curl up in a ball, I want to pretend nothing ever happened, or that maybe there is still a chance. But there is nothing left, and I refuse to sit and fill my hole with food, so I think I will just not eat and maybe I will feel better. At least then I can redirect the pain.
But in the end, no matter if our worlds have crashed down around us, the rest of the world keeps on moving-and so had I. It doesn't matter if he will regret it in the future, because we both know that I won't be there. The decision has been made.
One and a half years, the best ever, love you, miss you, like a pickle.
<3 Ponchka AKA Smalls