(no subject)
I'm feeling a little better now. Still emo, but definitely better. I hung out with Carly last night for a while. We went out to Angry's (aka Friendly's) and I had some tea and she had a milkshake and we talked and talked and talked about all of our stuff. It was really good. I showed her some pictures and figured out why she couldn't hook up to the internet (she was using the wrong cable). My dad says he has an extra wireless router that we could sell to the Cummings, cheap, and set up for them. I'm pretty sure that if I weren't already integrated into that family, I would be then.
I also had a nice talk with Grady about some things. This was really good as well. I'm glad we talked, it also made me feel better about everything, although I don't think he knows how unrealistic he is. "Why don't you go visit *unnamed place* this summer then?" Well, Grady, because it wouldn't help the whole "moving on" thing, not that I want to move on yet at all.
It's a good thing TMBG music can't help but make me smile, because I keep trying to use it to feed my emo based on associations, but instead I just can't help but feel gloriously happy when I listen. You just can't listen to "The Alphabet of Nations" without cracking a smile, it's like drinking a gallon of whole milk in an hour or eating four saltines in a minute, it just can't be done.
I'm such a creep sometimes, with my freebox sweater that still smells faintly amazing, and my clear-lensed sunglasses (they say they're protective), and trying to be still at Smith in my head. I told my mom, still waiting to tell my dad. Tomorrow. My dad is so much more chill than my mom, so I think it will go better with him. Or it will if he doesn't try to convince me that I'm not.
Home is weird. If I want vegetables with dinner I have to cook them. There isn't an infinite supply of salad on hand. I also have to buy some rice milk, because for whatever reason I'm addicted to it. I've only been home for one night and I already feel so unhealthy.
I also had a nice talk with Grady about some things. This was really good as well. I'm glad we talked, it also made me feel better about everything, although I don't think he knows how unrealistic he is. "Why don't you go visit *unnamed place* this summer then?" Well, Grady, because it wouldn't help the whole "moving on" thing, not that I want to move on yet at all.
It's a good thing TMBG music can't help but make me smile, because I keep trying to use it to feed my emo based on associations, but instead I just can't help but feel gloriously happy when I listen. You just can't listen to "The Alphabet of Nations" without cracking a smile, it's like drinking a gallon of whole milk in an hour or eating four saltines in a minute, it just can't be done.
I'm such a creep sometimes, with my freebox sweater that still smells faintly amazing, and my clear-lensed sunglasses (they say they're protective), and trying to be still at Smith in my head. I told my mom, still waiting to tell my dad. Tomorrow. My dad is so much more chill than my mom, so I think it will go better with him. Or it will if he doesn't try to convince me that I'm not.
Home is weird. If I want vegetables with dinner I have to cook them. There isn't an infinite supply of salad on hand. I also have to buy some rice milk, because for whatever reason I'm addicted to it. I've only been home for one night and I already feel so unhealthy.