(no subject)
I am comming home this weekend.
Tonight I am going to koshkosh, and hopefully will see people and have a splendid time, because otherwsie i am just going to be with kelly and that is not terrible, but id feel out of place perhaps.....
Then tomorrow home. I don't even know if i will be allowed to stay at my parents house.... how sad is that.
Maybe I don't want to go, maybe I want to stay here and be miserable, but what if I go home and i am miserable.
I worry.
Maybe It's good to get away for a weekend, and hopefully see people, and give luke time so he doesnt feel smothered, (though ive seen him twice this week which i hardly would call "too much"
But I am worried, i want to be here, if i get that drunken call tonight, I want to be here if he really wants to hang out and spend time with me tomorrow.
I am worried (and yes people i know its fuckin ridiculous) but i worry that he will forget me while i am gone, and realize once again he has more fun with the boys and wants nothing to do with me, resulting in shit between us and most likely a breakup... if you knew him you'd understand why I feel like this.
I have like 3 hours to make a decision.
shitty.
I watched gremlins last night, it made me happy.
I wish things were the way they used to be.
Good news: My name is Sandy, and my lover, Cindy and I have had 3 lovely dates.
goodness just shoot me.
Tonight I am going to koshkosh, and hopefully will see people and have a splendid time, because otherwsie i am just going to be with kelly and that is not terrible, but id feel out of place perhaps.....
Then tomorrow home. I don't even know if i will be allowed to stay at my parents house.... how sad is that.
Maybe I don't want to go, maybe I want to stay here and be miserable, but what if I go home and i am miserable.
I worry.
Maybe It's good to get away for a weekend, and hopefully see people, and give luke time so he doesnt feel smothered, (though ive seen him twice this week which i hardly would call "too much"
But I am worried, i want to be here, if i get that drunken call tonight, I want to be here if he really wants to hang out and spend time with me tomorrow.
I am worried (and yes people i know its fuckin ridiculous) but i worry that he will forget me while i am gone, and realize once again he has more fun with the boys and wants nothing to do with me, resulting in shit between us and most likely a breakup... if you knew him you'd understand why I feel like this.
I have like 3 hours to make a decision.
shitty.
I watched gremlins last night, it made me happy.
I wish things were the way they used to be.
Good news: My name is Sandy, and my lover, Cindy and I have had 3 lovely dates.
goodness just shoot me.