(no subject)
I figured as a way of making me feel better I will try to mock every shitty situation I've been in for the past month. October has proven to be the most despised month in my calendar. In the first weekend, my best friend hosted a barbeque for one of the organizations she's a part of, lots of food and lots of drinks. Few shots later the house was mayhem, with no responsible/sober tenants in sight, the house fell apart and with its deteriorations came ours as well. In my drunken stupor I found it very appropriate to call my mother and inform her of my debaucheries. After the conversation, I lost my phone, lost my phone in my own house. As nighttime fell upon us, I found myself at home lonely lying on my carpet and unable to remember the last three hours. I realized that I cannot ever go back to binge drinking, it always ends in disgrace. If that wasn't bad enough I went on a field trip across town, trying to look for someone who might help me figure out what had just happened. I'm an idiot. The next day I woke up feeling stupid and slightly embarrassed for my behavior, with no phone in sight and with memories of my conversation with my mother still fresh in my head, I decided not having a phone was probably a good thing for the moment. I needed the loneliness to figure somethings out.
Two days later the e-mail I was waiting for arrived, my mother's monotonous disappointed e-mail was routine after each time I failed under her eyes-which was often, so I have the e-mail memorized. I brushed it off and went on with my silly life. Just last week, I was driving my best friend and I to walmart in hopes to find something to amuse us. I backed out at the light and frantically hit someone riding his bicycle. In horror I apologized to the man who gracefully asked for money for the damages, I couldn't refuse I had almost killed the poor dude. Later on, I laughed at the misfortune. That same week I quit my job out of desperation and annoyance, working at American Eagle was probably the worst thing I've ever done in my life. By the end of the week I was feeling the stresses of unemployment as the bills piled up on my desk. I tend to be extremely emotional and dramatic in all my bad situations, it's the only way I can get rid of the frustration, by making every one laugh with my theatricals. I engaged in various arguments with the guy I am madly in love with. So of course, it was only fair that by the end of the week I would confess this undying love for him and freak him out, as he was under the impression we were just good friends. In anger I got into more arguments with him over petty things. Saturday night trying to erase all memories of the month, I drank and later on fled from the party I was at, without a word. Now, I sit here without one good friend and laughing at yet another unfortunate event... I was taking my laptop back into my bedroom when this one launched at me and stabbed my collarbone. The wonderful beauty of my life. Despite everything, I know all the stupid things that seem to easily bring me down every day are just that, stupid. =)
Two days later the e-mail I was waiting for arrived, my mother's monotonous disappointed e-mail was routine after each time I failed under her eyes-which was often, so I have the e-mail memorized. I brushed it off and went on with my silly life. Just last week, I was driving my best friend and I to walmart in hopes to find something to amuse us. I backed out at the light and frantically hit someone riding his bicycle. In horror I apologized to the man who gracefully asked for money for the damages, I couldn't refuse I had almost killed the poor dude. Later on, I laughed at the misfortune. That same week I quit my job out of desperation and annoyance, working at American Eagle was probably the worst thing I've ever done in my life. By the end of the week I was feeling the stresses of unemployment as the bills piled up on my desk. I tend to be extremely emotional and dramatic in all my bad situations, it's the only way I can get rid of the frustration, by making every one laugh with my theatricals. I engaged in various arguments with the guy I am madly in love with. So of course, it was only fair that by the end of the week I would confess this undying love for him and freak him out, as he was under the impression we were just good friends. In anger I got into more arguments with him over petty things. Saturday night trying to erase all memories of the month, I drank and later on fled from the party I was at, without a word. Now, I sit here without one good friend and laughing at yet another unfortunate event... I was taking my laptop back into my bedroom when this one launched at me and stabbed my collarbone. The wonderful beauty of my life. Despite everything, I know all the stupid things that seem to easily bring me down every day are just that, stupid. =)