(no subject)
hey
well.. stuff with chris is pretty damn cool, he is possibly one of the nicest and most considerate/caring people i have ever had the pleasure of meeting or being with. its made me realise a few things
i dont really know how to cope with a lot of other stuff in my life. turbulence and change is something i generally dont deal with to well
ive kind of realised that there are some things you should just not lose energy worrying about, because ultimately, its not worth it. im not sure if i can do that. i think i care to much. it think i may give up on online diaries because i can never really express my emotions. infact i never have done.
im letting go
i want to move on
i see patterns in the way i act now i never saw before, like to blame myself for things that happens and arent my fault, this incredible guilt complex i have managed to aquire. Its kind of a revelation to know and feel you are an ok, no, good person. That you arent to blame for everything. I fucking hate my guilt. but i dont hate me.
well.. stuff with chris is pretty damn cool, he is possibly one of the nicest and most considerate/caring people i have ever had the pleasure of meeting or being with. its made me realise a few things
i dont really know how to cope with a lot of other stuff in my life. turbulence and change is something i generally dont deal with to well
ive kind of realised that there are some things you should just not lose energy worrying about, because ultimately, its not worth it. im not sure if i can do that. i think i care to much. it think i may give up on online diaries because i can never really express my emotions. infact i never have done.
im letting go
i want to move on
i see patterns in the way i act now i never saw before, like to blame myself for things that happens and arent my fault, this incredible guilt complex i have managed to aquire. Its kind of a revelation to know and feel you are an ok, no, good person. That you arent to blame for everything. I fucking hate my guilt. but i dont hate me.