commenting… tiny blurbs of sound… like a verbal nod
I don’t comment enough. I know that. I know I should. My ‘fear’ is that it might lead to discussion, and I feel I’m crap at any kind of conversation, in terms of keeping it going. I’d drop out mid-way through, leaving things hanging. I do it in RL, with flesh-and-blood people, find myself struggling with finding words to use, words that make sense. I do it mid-thought, mid-action, mid- everything.
I’m doing it now. After each phrase written down, I found myself with head turned and staring outside at the swaying trees and the flying birds struggling in the wind, and the birds on the ground, seeing one bird and seeing all of them at once.
Many times the urge to comment is strong, but alongside it is something else. A warning, whispering about what happens if there’s a response… What to do then?… What to say?… What if there is no urge to respond to the response?…
The urge to interact with others is a fickle urge, coming when it will and lasting only as long as it will.
It use to last much longer, months even. And then it was weeks, and then days. It’s since dwindled to maybe hours. I just generally don’t like interacting.
And then I do.
See what I mean?
So I figure the safe response is to exist in such a way that will eventually become the norm.