Going Thru the Motions
[OOC: This journal entry is done in ficlet form. A few of these backstory entries will be like this.]
Her grandmother's house was far too quiet so Ami turned on the radio. Enough fiddling and she found music, not quite her usual taste and preferences but it was something. She stared at the radio for the longest time after that, trying to remember why it was that she'd turned it on to begin with.
"Ami, the kettle."
She turned her head at the sound of the voice behind her, not so much at the sound of her name. Startled, she blinked and gave a small gasp at the sight of her friend and fellow Tomorrow Person.
"Adam, what are you doing here?"
There was something in his face, some sadness or something that she simply couldn't identify as he took her hand and guided her towards the couch. "I'm taking care of you remember? Making sure that you rest and eat and do all those important things."
"No," Ami shook her head and stood. Rather, she tried to stand, but Adam restrained her with gentle pressure on her wrists. She continued her protest as her mind thought of all the things she needed to do. Mum's medications, Gran's medications, Aunt Therese's and Little Sara's. She had them all written down in a nice neat little schedule planner so that she gave it to them on time. Sara wouldn't take hers without plum pudding.
Except . . .
The world crashed down around her, memory swirling to the surface and Ami's shoulders slumped anew.
There were no more medications, no more tea for Gran and no more plum pudding for Sara.
This wasn't the first time she'd had such a lapse and Ami doubted that it would be the last.
Adam pulled her into a hug and she burrowed her face there in the crick of his neck, crying for not the first time and likely not the last either. She felt his sympathy and his understanding, she felt the safety and security that Adam always personified.
The tea kettle continued its mournful wail.
* * * *
The smallest, the frailest and the weakest, it was Sara who lasted the longest. The five year old fought Fate's Handmaiden with every last bit of strength and breath in her body. Near the end, she only relaxed when Ami held her and read from the tattered copy of God Bless the Gargoyles.
Her tiny body looked smaller than her five years, reclined as it were in the double bed, surrounded by pillows and many of Ami's old stuffed animals. The life size doll bedside the curly haired little girl was larger, and more vibrant with color and life.
Ami didn't know how long she stood in the doorway, simply staring at Sara. She didn't even notice when her vision began to blur until she felt Adam's light touch on her back and his soft telepathic prompting, /Ami, I can do it./
"No," Ami snapped back to herself with a stubborn shake of her head. "I can - she's smaller than . . . they were." She didn't have to elaborate. Adam knew that she spoke of her mother, her aunt and her grandmother, all of whom he'd helped her bury in the back garden.
She washed Sara's tiny body and dressed in her a bright pink dress she'd found in Sara's closet. Sara said that pink was her favorite color, so pink it would be. Once the little girl was dressed, Ami sewed her carefully into the bed sheets and comforter - Disney Princesses taken from the girl's bedroom. She didn't stop to think or to talk, Ami simply went through the motions. If she stopped, she would get derailed again and she couldn't afford derailment.
That task done, Adam accompanied her halfway around the world where they laid Sara to rest with her parents and her brother and sister, in the garden behind their house. No words were said. No words seemed to be appropriate.
That night Ami read God Bless the Gargoyles before going to sleep.
Her grandmother's house was far too quiet so Ami turned on the radio. Enough fiddling and she found music, not quite her usual taste and preferences but it was something. She stared at the radio for the longest time after that, trying to remember why it was that she'd turned it on to begin with.
"Ami, the kettle."
She turned her head at the sound of the voice behind her, not so much at the sound of her name. Startled, she blinked and gave a small gasp at the sight of her friend and fellow Tomorrow Person.
"Adam, what are you doing here?"
There was something in his face, some sadness or something that she simply couldn't identify as he took her hand and guided her towards the couch. "I'm taking care of you remember? Making sure that you rest and eat and do all those important things."
"No," Ami shook her head and stood. Rather, she tried to stand, but Adam restrained her with gentle pressure on her wrists. She continued her protest as her mind thought of all the things she needed to do. Mum's medications, Gran's medications, Aunt Therese's and Little Sara's. She had them all written down in a nice neat little schedule planner so that she gave it to them on time. Sara wouldn't take hers without plum pudding.
Except . . .
The world crashed down around her, memory swirling to the surface and Ami's shoulders slumped anew.
There were no more medications, no more tea for Gran and no more plum pudding for Sara.
This wasn't the first time she'd had such a lapse and Ami doubted that it would be the last.
Adam pulled her into a hug and she burrowed her face there in the crick of his neck, crying for not the first time and likely not the last either. She felt his sympathy and his understanding, she felt the safety and security that Adam always personified.
The tea kettle continued its mournful wail.
* * * *
The smallest, the frailest and the weakest, it was Sara who lasted the longest. The five year old fought Fate's Handmaiden with every last bit of strength and breath in her body. Near the end, she only relaxed when Ami held her and read from the tattered copy of God Bless the Gargoyles.
Her tiny body looked smaller than her five years, reclined as it were in the double bed, surrounded by pillows and many of Ami's old stuffed animals. The life size doll bedside the curly haired little girl was larger, and more vibrant with color and life.
Ami didn't know how long she stood in the doorway, simply staring at Sara. She didn't even notice when her vision began to blur until she felt Adam's light touch on her back and his soft telepathic prompting, /Ami, I can do it./
"No," Ami snapped back to herself with a stubborn shake of her head. "I can - she's smaller than . . . they were." She didn't have to elaborate. Adam knew that she spoke of her mother, her aunt and her grandmother, all of whom he'd helped her bury in the back garden.
She washed Sara's tiny body and dressed in her a bright pink dress she'd found in Sara's closet. Sara said that pink was her favorite color, so pink it would be. Once the little girl was dressed, Ami sewed her carefully into the bed sheets and comforter - Disney Princesses taken from the girl's bedroom. She didn't stop to think or to talk, Ami simply went through the motions. If she stopped, she would get derailed again and she couldn't afford derailment.
That task done, Adam accompanied her halfway around the world where they laid Sara to rest with her parents and her brother and sister, in the garden behind their house. No words were said. No words seemed to be appropriate.
That night Ami read God Bless the Gargoyles before going to sleep.