Title: Recovery
Author: Ami Ven
Rating: G
Word Count: 550
Prompt:
mcsheplets challenge #063 ‘fall’
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Pairing(s): John Sheppard/Rodney McKay
Setting: part of my
On the Run ‘verse
Summary: Rodney recovers from an illness and some revelations.
Recovery
“Hey, buddy,” said John’s voice, as Rodney blinked his way towards consciousness. John was sitting on the edge of their bed, his hand cool against Rodney’s neck. “How’re you feeling?”
“Am I dead?” Rodney asked, after a moment, his voice hoarse but steady. “Because I didn’t think being dead would hurt this much.”
“You’re not dead,” said John, the coolness of his hand sliding up to cup Rodney’s jaw. “I wouldn’t let you die, McKay.”
Rodney didn’t have a reply to that that wasn’t horribly sentimental, so instead he asked, “How long was I out?”
“About three days,” said John, ducking his head and fiddling with the blanket, a clear sign that he was upset and trying to hide it. “You were… you were pretty out of it, Rodney. You kept calling Teyla ‘Jeannie’ and telling her you were sorry.”
“Oh,” said Rodney. “That’s… Jeannie is my sister. We didn’t exactly part on the best terms and by now, she either thinks I’m dead or a fugitive, so…” He frowned. “What did I call you?”
John ducked his head again. “You called me ‘John’,” he said. “You always knew who I was, and that is the only reason I didn’t haul you through the ‘gate to Atlantis and have a real doctor look at you.”
“Are you insane!?” Rodney yelped, which triggered a coughing fit that doubled him over.
John slid in behind him, rubbing circles between his shoulder blades until it eased. “Rodney-”
“Are you insane?” his husband repeated. “We don’t know if they even sent another expedition, let alone who’s running it. For all we know, they’d have stunned- or shot- you the second you walked through the ‘gate and shipped what was left of you straight back to Leavenworth.”
“So I should have just sat here and watched you die?” John growled. “My life is not worth yours!”
“Yes, it is!” Rodney yelled. He twisted, tangling in the blankets, so he could face John. “It is, John, because you are all that I have and I cannot lose you, do you understand that?”
“I know,” said John, a catch in his voice. “You gave up everything for me, Rodney, and I’m never grateful enough. I-”
“Shut up!” hissed Rodney. “Just shut up. I don’t want you to be grateful, Sheppard, I want you to be here. How many times do I have to say it before it finally gets through all that hair? I knew what I was doing when I left Earth, John, and I will not-”
He broke off, coughing violently again, and John wrapped both arms tightly around him.
“I’m sorry,” said John, muffled against Rodney’s collarbone. “I don’t know why I can’t just let this go. But I know I don’t deserve you, Rodney, and you don’t need me, not really, and you scared the hell out of me, getting sick like that. You just, you do everything, you fix our ‘jumper and you fix me-”
Rodney kissed him, fumbling and off-center, but John melted into it eagerly.
“I need you,” Rodney said, when they broke for air. “You’re not all that I have because I gave up everything else, John. You’re all that I have because everything else doesn’t matter. Okay?”
John let out a shaky laugh. “Yeah.”
THE END
Current Mood:
blah