what it is to burn

[amgb]

a good friend asked me today if i had any regrets about things i didnt do this summer... i found this question really hard to answer, and i couldnt pinpoint why. i thought maybe b/c i wasnt being asked about a spacific thing that i didnt do i was having trouble coming up w/ my own... but i have been thinking about it, its more like that i simply

Comments

regret

[anonymous]

I envy anyone that goes through life without regrets. I see almost all mistakes as regrets. In many situations, I truly wish things would have been different even if it costs the wisdom I gained. When I look back at many things in my life, I wish that my response would have been different... more importantly that the result wouldve been different. Countless times I've done something and wished I hadn't or not done something I should have or perhaps even just done something differently. Each time I feel this way, each time I fail, each time I fall, memories spring forth of past regrets, past failings. So, each time I get up, I have to deal with not just one failure, but a dozen. Thinking, wondering, coulda, shoulda, woulda, is all useless and in fact detrimental. But at the same time, the train of one's thoughts cannot easily be derailed and when the thoughts smack your consciousness it hits just as hard as a train. You get hit, you fall, you get hurt, you bleed, and the pain swells. You sit and wallow in your own pain drowning and all u want to do is disappear.

Then you get up. You have no choice. Life goes on and the moment is gone. And you're right, nothing we could do except learn from our last mistakes. But life is not as cynical as this. There will be better moments. Live each life day by day, and you'll be able to look back and see the clearer picture. I am far from perfect and so is my life. But when I look back, I know that I was in charge that my accomplishments lie side by side with my failings. I wasn't forced to do anything. It was all me. And in the end, the people that matter wont remember me for what I accomplished or where I failed but who I am. That, is evident not in the result, but in the action itself and the intent behind it.

Life is suffering but suffering is not life. Take the good with the bad, and perhaps you'll achieve the great.

- AG