The Perfect Gift
Everyone I know -in life- knows what I'm getting for xmas.
This would totally not bother me most times, since I know the MB is criminally indiscreet, and also, I'm always for a good joke on me.
But, well, this year? I'll give you the very first conversation I had with the MB about my gift (because he is so excited about it, he couldn't even keep it from me)
MB: Oh man. [yes, we have started to talk kind of the same] I bought your gift today. I am SO excited! It is the best gift ever! You. Are. Going. To. Hate. It.
Me: Wha?
MB: Yeah! You're going to be so mad when you open it! You're going to swear up a storm!
Me: Why why would you purposefully buy something that I'm going to hate?
MB: Because it's the perfect gift!
Me: ... DOES NOT COMPUTE*
MB: No really! It is!
Me: Aaaaaaand, you don't see how "you're totally going to hate this" and "the most perfect gift ever" are mutually exclusive features?
MB: No way.
No seriously. This is my life.
My first thought is a pair of head-crocs (an ipod), but not everyone in life knows how much I hate those things. (and absolutely everyone is telling me how much I'm going to hate this thing) It can't be licquor related, because that would be an automatic good thing.
It fits in a "small box". I'd bet my life (but oddly, not my salary) that it's not jewlery.
I just want to weep. I feel like Christmas is ruined already.
So now I'm not even looking forward to my days off. I just want the whole thing to be over and done with so that I can go back to being normal-crazy, as opposed to criminally unhappy.
*yes, I actually said this. Like an 80's computer voice even
This would totally not bother me most times, since I know the MB is criminally indiscreet, and also, I'm always for a good joke on me.
But, well, this year? I'll give you the very first conversation I had with the MB about my gift (because he is so excited about it, he couldn't even keep it from me)
MB: Oh man. [yes, we have started to talk kind of the same] I bought your gift today. I am SO excited! It is the best gift ever! You. Are. Going. To. Hate. It.
Me: Wha?
MB: Yeah! You're going to be so mad when you open it! You're going to swear up a storm!
Me: Why why would you purposefully buy something that I'm going to hate?
MB: Because it's the perfect gift!
Me: ... DOES NOT COMPUTE*
MB: No really! It is!
Me: Aaaaaaand, you don't see how "you're totally going to hate this" and "the most perfect gift ever" are mutually exclusive features?
MB: No way.
No seriously. This is my life.
My first thought is a pair of head-crocs (an ipod), but not everyone in life knows how much I hate those things. (and absolutely everyone is telling me how much I'm going to hate this thing) It can't be licquor related, because that would be an automatic good thing.
It fits in a "small box". I'd bet my life (but oddly, not my salary) that it's not jewlery.
I just want to weep. I feel like Christmas is ruined already.
So now I'm not even looking forward to my days off. I just want the whole thing to be over and done with so that I can go back to being normal-crazy, as opposed to criminally unhappy.
*yes, I actually said this. Like an 80's computer voice even