you'll give it up when you're young and you want some.
1. Putting the kidlet to bed, and she starts counting people on her fingers, which is how Joan-ma did it to list all of the people who were coming to her birthday party. So it used to be: "Steve and Emily and Chuck, and Dana…" etc. Now it was the following:
Her: Unca Jer, and a-Steve, and a shark and Dana.
Me: A shark? Really?
Her: Ohhhhh yeah! (grabs her thumb) And a mama.
Me: So glad I'm included in the shark party.
Her: (so serious) With spidermancake and Santa Claus and snowmans.
I have recently discovered that all things Spiderman have now been termed "spidermancake". Good to know.
2. RECS COMING WHEN I GET OFF MY ARSE.
3. I played Rockband for the first time the other night, and it was depressing because all I could think was how much Tianyu would have loved it, and there's no one in my house to play it with. On the inverse, I drunkenly got a 99% on "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" on Hard, and I have never sung it before, so that has to mean something.
4. Okay so I had a CRAZY ASS DREAM.
Okay so FIRST, yeah, I think I was a member of Torchwood, but Jack was the only one I recognised, I mean from the show. Apparently all the others were newbies, Torchwood, the location, was in an old hotel, like a casino hotel, but the rooms were emptied out casino room floors that were underground, meaning that all the slot machines and gaming tables had been cleared but it still had that shitty patterned carpeting.
Here's the thing: we had a Dalek. Okay, it was deactivated and (though I know there's supposed to be a live dude in there) reprogrammed so that it was basically harmless, and we kept it deactivated unless there were new recruits, and then we ran a program where the Dalek activates and scares the shit out of the new person to kind of…test their mettle under fire.
Jack is not fond of this thing. I think I was like, ::hand wavey:: IT WILL BE FINE. WHAT COULD GO WRONG?
WELL.
Okay so the Dalek does its thing, and the new recruit (whose face and shit I forget because that's what dreams are like: vivid during, fading after) freaks the fuck out, and I'm starting to get a little nervous because Jack isn't there and the Dalek is taking longer to run its program and shut down. Our Hub is filled with that space age airport furniture and a giant round kiosk like a DJ booth. That's only important because of what happens next.
The Dalek finishes its spiel, the recruit reasonably flips out, and then the thing powers down like an animatronic critter from Showbiz Pizza, just like it's supposed to, but in the wrong place and slower than normal, and the red light on the side is still on, and I'm irrationally nervous about it. But hey, it worked, right? I think I might have spent some time yelling and or laughing at the new person. Probably both.
Jack returns from wherever he was, getting Thai, I dunno, and the Dalek activates and goes APESHIT, just, you know, eyestalking and screaming and spraying death beams everywhere, which are apparently just harmless light beams (we DEACTIVATED IT, REMEMBER?), but for some reason Jack and I fake die when they hit us, and I fall behind some airport benches (I TOLD YOU THEY'D BE IMPORTANT LATER) and Jack's lying on the floor facing me, and we do the "don't move, srsly don't move just stay right there like that" game with our eyeballs.
So then, THEN, the thing's rolling around (I dunno why we're afraid of it if it's so goddamn ineffective, but whateva), doing Dalek-y shit, arranging flowers, whatever, and you know when you're lying on the floor and you get that feeling that something is behind you? I'm about to get up and move around and get my James Bond on, and I feel that feeling, and the mutherfucking Dalek is like right the fuck here. Jack's sliding along the floor, and I just hear the Dalek and a saw and all kinds of BAD noise and…
Then I think I woke up. BUT THEN. I went back to sleep, and the dream picked up a little later in the plot line, except the Dalek's plating is made out of that smooth stormtrooper white enameled plating, and we're still trying to figure out how to get around it as it rolls all over the place, like, rerouting shit, calling--I dunno, Dalek headquarters, and in general being grumpy (I suspect most Daleks just need some Mentos and a FTD bouquet. Let them win a game of hopscotch at recess, and you will see a much improved Dalek.), and I discover that the best way to get around the Dalek (I don't know what for), is to RIDE ON THE BACK OF IT. IT HAS A CONVENIENT FOOT STEP IN THE BACK AND I JUST KIND OF HOLD ON, AND IT ROLLS AROUND, COMPLETELY BLIND TO THE FACT THAT I'M HANGING OFF THE BACK OF IT.
WTF ME?
I really woke up then, because my kid was like, "THERE'S SNOW SNOWMAN SNOW SNOWMANS AND THE SNOW AND THE SANTA CLAUS OPEN THE PRESENTS AND THE SNOW SPIDERMAN CAKE AND I AM SICK."
So that was it. W.T.F.
5. In honor of the awesomeness that is Jack, I present for you today: a little Ray Charles. Baby if you want to stay on my mind, now, you've got to love your daddy all the time.
Her: Unca Jer, and a-Steve, and a shark and Dana.
Me: A shark? Really?
Her: Ohhhhh yeah! (grabs her thumb) And a mama.
Me: So glad I'm included in the shark party.
Her: (so serious) With spidermancake and Santa Claus and snowmans.
I have recently discovered that all things Spiderman have now been termed "spidermancake". Good to know.
2. RECS COMING WHEN I GET OFF MY ARSE.
3. I played Rockband for the first time the other night, and it was depressing because all I could think was how much Tianyu would have loved it, and there's no one in my house to play it with. On the inverse, I drunkenly got a 99% on "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" on Hard, and I have never sung it before, so that has to mean something.
4. Okay so I had a CRAZY ASS DREAM.
Okay so FIRST, yeah, I think I was a member of Torchwood, but Jack was the only one I recognised, I mean from the show. Apparently all the others were newbies, Torchwood, the location, was in an old hotel, like a casino hotel, but the rooms were emptied out casino room floors that were underground, meaning that all the slot machines and gaming tables had been cleared but it still had that shitty patterned carpeting.
Here's the thing: we had a Dalek. Okay, it was deactivated and (though I know there's supposed to be a live dude in there) reprogrammed so that it was basically harmless, and we kept it deactivated unless there were new recruits, and then we ran a program where the Dalek activates and scares the shit out of the new person to kind of…test their mettle under fire.
Jack is not fond of this thing. I think I was like, ::hand wavey:: IT WILL BE FINE. WHAT COULD GO WRONG?
WELL.
Okay so the Dalek does its thing, and the new recruit (whose face and shit I forget because that's what dreams are like: vivid during, fading after) freaks the fuck out, and I'm starting to get a little nervous because Jack isn't there and the Dalek is taking longer to run its program and shut down. Our Hub is filled with that space age airport furniture and a giant round kiosk like a DJ booth. That's only important because of what happens next.
The Dalek finishes its spiel, the recruit reasonably flips out, and then the thing powers down like an animatronic critter from Showbiz Pizza, just like it's supposed to, but in the wrong place and slower than normal, and the red light on the side is still on, and I'm irrationally nervous about it. But hey, it worked, right? I think I might have spent some time yelling and or laughing at the new person. Probably both.
Jack returns from wherever he was, getting Thai, I dunno, and the Dalek activates and goes APESHIT, just, you know, eyestalking and screaming and spraying death beams everywhere, which are apparently just harmless light beams (we DEACTIVATED IT, REMEMBER?), but for some reason Jack and I fake die when they hit us, and I fall behind some airport benches (I TOLD YOU THEY'D BE IMPORTANT LATER) and Jack's lying on the floor facing me, and we do the "don't move, srsly don't move just stay right there like that" game with our eyeballs.
So then, THEN, the thing's rolling around (I dunno why we're afraid of it if it's so goddamn ineffective, but whateva), doing Dalek-y shit, arranging flowers, whatever, and you know when you're lying on the floor and you get that feeling that something is behind you? I'm about to get up and move around and get my James Bond on, and I feel that feeling, and the mutherfucking Dalek is like right the fuck here. Jack's sliding along the floor, and I just hear the Dalek and a saw and all kinds of BAD noise and…
Then I think I woke up. BUT THEN. I went back to sleep, and the dream picked up a little later in the plot line, except the Dalek's plating is made out of that smooth stormtrooper white enameled plating, and we're still trying to figure out how to get around it as it rolls all over the place, like, rerouting shit, calling--I dunno, Dalek headquarters, and in general being grumpy (I suspect most Daleks just need some Mentos and a FTD bouquet. Let them win a game of hopscotch at recess, and you will see a much improved Dalek.), and I discover that the best way to get around the Dalek (I don't know what for), is to RIDE ON THE BACK OF IT. IT HAS A CONVENIENT FOOT STEP IN THE BACK AND I JUST KIND OF HOLD ON, AND IT ROLLS AROUND, COMPLETELY BLIND TO THE FACT THAT I'M HANGING OFF THE BACK OF IT.
WTF ME?
I really woke up then, because my kid was like, "THERE'S SNOW SNOWMAN SNOW SNOWMANS AND THE SNOW AND THE SANTA CLAUS OPEN THE PRESENTS AND THE SNOW SPIDERMAN CAKE AND I AM SICK."
So that was it. W.T.F.
5. In honor of the awesomeness that is Jack, I present for you today: a little Ray Charles. Baby if you want to stay on my mind, now, you've got to love your daddy all the time.