I can't remember when it was good/moments of happiness elude/maybe I just misunderstood
And apparently my boyfriend just broke up with me.
THE FUCK?
Am I that worthless? I'm too much trouble to keep, long-distance. He doesn't have time for me.
I don't know whether to cry or be relieved. And that makes me guilty, which hurts my fucked up stomach even more.
He has the nerve to do this over a text, and then when I say back I understand he fucking CALLS ME! Like I want to talk to him. Of course I'm not fucking all right. But you don't get to know that anymore, since I'm not desirable.
My teeth are clenched and my eyes are cried out from the shaking-shivery pain wracking my body earlier. No tears to cry for you sweets, if I'm not enough to you to keep, I'm not gonna cry for a fucker that doesn't even come close to what I wanted anyway.
I called Erika, and yes, you were right ok? I wasn't in love with him. You saw this coming, but it still hurts to be broken up with ok? You understand that, at least you should by now.
Damn, does he actually think we're gonna "kick it" when he comes here for Kurt in October? I don't fucking think so. I don't want to see you let alone anything else bitch.
God, I actually liked him. Does anyone know how hard that was for me? To make room for him in my heart, to want to be with him? I'm disgusted now. With him, but especially with myself.
Why do the people I want never want me back?
Why am I never enough?
THE FUCK?
Am I that worthless? I'm too much trouble to keep, long-distance. He doesn't have time for me.
I don't know whether to cry or be relieved. And that makes me guilty, which hurts my fucked up stomach even more.
He has the nerve to do this over a text, and then when I say back I understand he fucking CALLS ME! Like I want to talk to him. Of course I'm not fucking all right. But you don't get to know that anymore, since I'm not desirable.
My teeth are clenched and my eyes are cried out from the shaking-shivery pain wracking my body earlier. No tears to cry for you sweets, if I'm not enough to you to keep, I'm not gonna cry for a fucker that doesn't even come close to what I wanted anyway.
I called Erika, and yes, you were right ok? I wasn't in love with him. You saw this coming, but it still hurts to be broken up with ok? You understand that, at least you should by now.
Damn, does he actually think we're gonna "kick it" when he comes here for Kurt in October? I don't fucking think so. I don't want to see you let alone anything else bitch.
God, I actually liked him. Does anyone know how hard that was for me? To make room for him in my heart, to want to be with him? I'm disgusted now. With him, but especially with myself.
Why do the people I want never want me back?
Why am I never enough?