Send me to a standing still in time..
Confusion. Pure, uninterrupted, life altering confusion. I feel like I lose out if I stay here, lose out if I leave. I feel like I've pent my whole life searching only to have life say ' well here it is. by the way, you cant have it'. It just makes me wonder what, if anything, is meant for me. What life am I aiming towards, when I wake up everyday, what goals am I trying to achieve, what do I hope for? I can't do this forever. Attend college with no major and no idea, continue working not alot of hours at a job that i love but there's no future in. There's nothing keeping me here and yet I just don't know if I'm ready to leave...confusion. Not sadness, just confusion and a sense of 'hmmm...what now?'
And of course theres the other thing, the most confusing thing of all. The best and worst feeling I've ever had all rolled into one neat package of befuddlement ( i love any chance i get to use that word)How can you find something so great, the one thing everyone hopes for,and its unbelievably unattainable? Painstakingly so. Its not fair, and i think i deserve a tiny bit of fair in my life at this point. Not alot, just some remnant of a life that doesnt purposefully screw me over.
"And were we ever somewhere else
You know, it's hard to say
And I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world
You've given me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh I never saw blue like that
And it feels like now
and it feels like always
And somethings are the way they are
And words just can't explain"
ahhh, angsty/slightly cheesy music. always a pick me up. for me anyway.
And of course theres the other thing, the most confusing thing of all. The best and worst feeling I've ever had all rolled into one neat package of befuddlement ( i love any chance i get to use that word)How can you find something so great, the one thing everyone hopes for,and its unbelievably unattainable? Painstakingly so. Its not fair, and i think i deserve a tiny bit of fair in my life at this point. Not alot, just some remnant of a life that doesnt purposefully screw me over.
"And were we ever somewhere else
You know, it's hard to say
And I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world
You've given me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh I never saw blue like that
And it feels like now
and it feels like always
And somethings are the way they are
And words just can't explain"
ahhh, angsty/slightly cheesy music. always a pick me up. for me anyway.