Lullaby
The only reason I'm writing is because it's late..it's that time of night where you have been alone and completely silent for a few hours, just thinking to yourself, and it seems like the perfect time to write a LiveJournal entry about whatever thoughts plague my scattered mind at the time.
It seems that I almost don't forget anything of importance anymore..if I really try..I can seem to pull any memory of something or some knowledge from the past with just a little effort. I talked to a girl about this once, but she was mostly listening to me talk..because this has happened to me before.
You know when you get something on the tip of your tounge? It's actually a disorder, called tip-of-the-tounge syndrome (real original, right?), and it happens to everyone every day. Well nothing that ever happens to you is "forgotten", everything is stored in our humoungous subconcious'. So if you really fight tip-of-the-toungue syndrome, as frusterating as it may be, you will eventually come across your lost memory. The more you exercise your mind by doing this, the better you become at it, and you just love the feeling when you finally remember, right?
I've been doing alot of reading and learning lately, about lots of stuff..some of it is completely irrellevant to anything in existance, and other things arn't. But all in all, everything is worth reading because the more you read the more you understand how the human mind works sometimes...and it always slightly improves your own, to learn from others mistakes or to observe with such though. The mind is just another muscle that needs a work out. In all this reading I've been getting really interested in alot of history in music, and I've heard stories of all these old great musicians, or not so old, but all of them made history somehow. There are so many great bands out there that noone listens to, and they really should, because there is so much talent in musicians very few people have ever heard. Even bands you don't normally listen to..but you know exist. Take a listen to some of their stuff...any music that was created from the soul (good music) can be appreciated..even if it is not your type. There are alot of bands I want to buy CDs of now..and I have the money, but if I were to do that..I literally would have no money for anything else. Do you guys know that I have over $500 worth of CDs? Now I couldn't sell my CDs for all that money...but that's how much I bought it for. There are exceptions, because I generally only guy when I get a great deal from a venue or CD store or whatever, but think about it. That's alot of fuckin' money. It's a good thing I'm making my own keep, and don't have to drain my parents money. They certainly need theirs. Man..the concept of money is a really bothersome thing. Regardless..buying CDs makes me more happy than most things in the world..and I can't wait to listen to some Fugazi or Planet Smashers or whatever is on my list for buying.
You may get "bored" of certain music you like..but that's only because your just humming along to the chorus, and you don't really appreciate or feel the music. Doing stuff like trying to hear every instrument...while listening to something that is so well put together: really intuitive, unique, just good music. So many things can be good music. This kind of stuff could only exist in a world blessed by God, for people to be talented enough to be able to create rhthym and melody so perfectly and remain in synchronization, not to mention be recorded on top-end digital mastery quality and whatever the fuck you want to call it. I mean think about it? Music is so perfect...I mean, Bill Gates said it's the most popular thing in the world. Why do you think that is? But then again: it's not the only thing in the world. But I do feel as if it wasn't in my world, I wouldn't enjoy life very much..that's for damn sure.
I can really truly understand why people get depressed about life and shit...but in all reality...depression is something overcomeable...and all you need is either a little guidance or a little of something that can show you how stupid depression is. There are so many great things in life that you should be able to look at, and not have another thought in the world...just love whatever you're looking it. Hell..so many great things to take your mind off whatever ails you. The only reason people ever get depressed is because they have so much spare time on their hands to wonder "why is everything?" then they get all sad for no reason. It's just a big stupid cycle. Stop it!
I tend to work best under pressure or bad circumstances. Like right now: I'm shirtless and am experiencing some really friggin' chilling degrees. I don't know how cold it is, but it is so uncomfortable, but makes me type fast and think fast without much wondering. But then again this whole thing is typed on impulse and is wondering in every sense of the word. But whatever...moving on.
I really like to read commics, humor and wit expressed by some really smart people who think about comedy all the time...it just makes you laugh. And laughing is one of those things I was talking about early...greatness..stuff that makes life worth living.
Today I was working, and it was a rough day. I made alot of money though, which was awesome. I got so many compliments today. I was told two or three times I was a great salesman, and also I was told I was a real singer. My shiftleader asked me if I was in chorus..because I shrill my voice (I guess that just means using a vibrato), and apparantly only real singers do that. Man that touched me...it touched me in a very nice way. Made me feel good, you know?
Adriana's entry is really damn interesting...you should read it. Nothing better than something that can make your mind just run around in circles and say "what the fuck is going on"! We need those kinds of things in life. We need to look outside the box..that's the only way anyone anywhere will get anywhere anytime ever. Seriously.
I feel taller than normally, and stronger, and I feel like my vision is better, and my voice is deeper. I dunno, maybe I'm being more observant to all the old obvious changes, or maybe I am really still growing. Who knows. All I know is I care about my body..and I want it to be as healthy and as fit as possible. I've been physically sick the past few days and man it sucks. Mental sickness is something that is always instaneously changeable...but when your physically sick...there is basically nothing you can do fix yourself immediatly. You always have to wait for the slow and tedious process to just get better.
Dreams are the best thing in the world. No matter what on earth is going on in your life...you can have a dream about ANYTHING. And they are usually fun and interesting and add such a crazy wacky spice to life you have no idea. I mean..hell..it's like going on some crazy adventure every single day. You always dream..you just don't remember. That's what the scientists say, anyway. But since when did they ever know shit?
You guys can go ahead and say to yourselves "man this guy is annoying..he thinks hes so smart and loves to talk about himself." Go ahead and think that. But also think...why are you thinking that? Just because I wrote alot? Do you think I'm some pseudo-intellectual bastard who thinks he knows the world? NO! I just have some things to say about thoughts in my head, and maybe I'll throw an opinion at you hear or there. It doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean you should judge me, and think of me as "this" or "that". Because I am whatever you want me to be, but more importantly, I am whoever I want to be. So don't judge me, motherfucker.
Man I'm gonna get fuckin' carpal tunnel or something...I'm going to bed. If you read this..thank you. If not, I don't blame you. I'm typing out of nothing..basically..nothingess, and did not intend anyone to read it. Moreso me getting to look at what my head is splurting out at random. It's nice to watch the screen just pop up with words and ideas as your fingers fly...guided by intuition and improvisation. I don't think I've ever backspaced or erased a single sentence on this entire entry. That's great for me...because usually I'm afraid of what I'm gonna say. Anyway, goodnight.
It seems that I almost don't forget anything of importance anymore..if I really try..I can seem to pull any memory of something or some knowledge from the past with just a little effort. I talked to a girl about this once, but she was mostly listening to me talk..because this has happened to me before.
You know when you get something on the tip of your tounge? It's actually a disorder, called tip-of-the-tounge syndrome (real original, right?), and it happens to everyone every day. Well nothing that ever happens to you is "forgotten", everything is stored in our humoungous subconcious'. So if you really fight tip-of-the-toungue syndrome, as frusterating as it may be, you will eventually come across your lost memory. The more you exercise your mind by doing this, the better you become at it, and you just love the feeling when you finally remember, right?
I've been doing alot of reading and learning lately, about lots of stuff..some of it is completely irrellevant to anything in existance, and other things arn't. But all in all, everything is worth reading because the more you read the more you understand how the human mind works sometimes...and it always slightly improves your own, to learn from others mistakes or to observe with such though. The mind is just another muscle that needs a work out. In all this reading I've been getting really interested in alot of history in music, and I've heard stories of all these old great musicians, or not so old, but all of them made history somehow. There are so many great bands out there that noone listens to, and they really should, because there is so much talent in musicians very few people have ever heard. Even bands you don't normally listen to..but you know exist. Take a listen to some of their stuff...any music that was created from the soul (good music) can be appreciated..even if it is not your type. There are alot of bands I want to buy CDs of now..and I have the money, but if I were to do that..I literally would have no money for anything else. Do you guys know that I have over $500 worth of CDs? Now I couldn't sell my CDs for all that money...but that's how much I bought it for. There are exceptions, because I generally only guy when I get a great deal from a venue or CD store or whatever, but think about it. That's alot of fuckin' money. It's a good thing I'm making my own keep, and don't have to drain my parents money. They certainly need theirs. Man..the concept of money is a really bothersome thing. Regardless..buying CDs makes me more happy than most things in the world..and I can't wait to listen to some Fugazi or Planet Smashers or whatever is on my list for buying.
You may get "bored" of certain music you like..but that's only because your just humming along to the chorus, and you don't really appreciate or feel the music. Doing stuff like trying to hear every instrument...while listening to something that is so well put together: really intuitive, unique, just good music. So many things can be good music. This kind of stuff could only exist in a world blessed by God, for people to be talented enough to be able to create rhthym and melody so perfectly and remain in synchronization, not to mention be recorded on top-end digital mastery quality and whatever the fuck you want to call it. I mean think about it? Music is so perfect...I mean, Bill Gates said it's the most popular thing in the world. Why do you think that is? But then again: it's not the only thing in the world. But I do feel as if it wasn't in my world, I wouldn't enjoy life very much..that's for damn sure.
I can really truly understand why people get depressed about life and shit...but in all reality...depression is something overcomeable...and all you need is either a little guidance or a little of something that can show you how stupid depression is. There are so many great things in life that you should be able to look at, and not have another thought in the world...just love whatever you're looking it. Hell..so many great things to take your mind off whatever ails you. The only reason people ever get depressed is because they have so much spare time on their hands to wonder "why is everything?" then they get all sad for no reason. It's just a big stupid cycle. Stop it!
I tend to work best under pressure or bad circumstances. Like right now: I'm shirtless and am experiencing some really friggin' chilling degrees. I don't know how cold it is, but it is so uncomfortable, but makes me type fast and think fast without much wondering. But then again this whole thing is typed on impulse and is wondering in every sense of the word. But whatever...moving on.
I really like to read commics, humor and wit expressed by some really smart people who think about comedy all the time...it just makes you laugh. And laughing is one of those things I was talking about early...greatness..stuff that makes life worth living.
Today I was working, and it was a rough day. I made alot of money though, which was awesome. I got so many compliments today. I was told two or three times I was a great salesman, and also I was told I was a real singer. My shiftleader asked me if I was in chorus..because I shrill my voice (I guess that just means using a vibrato), and apparantly only real singers do that. Man that touched me...it touched me in a very nice way. Made me feel good, you know?
Adriana's entry is really damn interesting...you should read it. Nothing better than something that can make your mind just run around in circles and say "what the fuck is going on"! We need those kinds of things in life. We need to look outside the box..that's the only way anyone anywhere will get anywhere anytime ever. Seriously.
I feel taller than normally, and stronger, and I feel like my vision is better, and my voice is deeper. I dunno, maybe I'm being more observant to all the old obvious changes, or maybe I am really still growing. Who knows. All I know is I care about my body..and I want it to be as healthy and as fit as possible. I've been physically sick the past few days and man it sucks. Mental sickness is something that is always instaneously changeable...but when your physically sick...there is basically nothing you can do fix yourself immediatly. You always have to wait for the slow and tedious process to just get better.
Dreams are the best thing in the world. No matter what on earth is going on in your life...you can have a dream about ANYTHING. And they are usually fun and interesting and add such a crazy wacky spice to life you have no idea. I mean..hell..it's like going on some crazy adventure every single day. You always dream..you just don't remember. That's what the scientists say, anyway. But since when did they ever know shit?
You guys can go ahead and say to yourselves "man this guy is annoying..he thinks hes so smart and loves to talk about himself." Go ahead and think that. But also think...why are you thinking that? Just because I wrote alot? Do you think I'm some pseudo-intellectual bastard who thinks he knows the world? NO! I just have some things to say about thoughts in my head, and maybe I'll throw an opinion at you hear or there. It doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean you should judge me, and think of me as "this" or "that". Because I am whatever you want me to be, but more importantly, I am whoever I want to be. So don't judge me, motherfucker.
Man I'm gonna get fuckin' carpal tunnel or something...I'm going to bed. If you read this..thank you. If not, I don't blame you. I'm typing out of nothing..basically..nothingess, and did not intend anyone to read it. Moreso me getting to look at what my head is splurting out at random. It's nice to watch the screen just pop up with words and ideas as your fingers fly...guided by intuition and improvisation. I don't think I've ever backspaced or erased a single sentence on this entire entry. That's great for me...because usually I'm afraid of what I'm gonna say. Anyway, goodnight.