I could not resist, OK? (possibly, now is the time to go D: )
Ok, so um. ninjaboots did this amazingly awesome 5-things-that-are-totally-canon-in-your-head-thing, that was totally awesome and amazing (obviously so since I used awesome and amazing to describe each other; leave me alone it's like two here ok? I'm allowed to be a little ridiculous). And it got me thinking about how I have almost a total AU canon in which my Nu!Kirk and Nu!Spock live in, because my brain gets lazy sometimes and pulls in relevant TOS moments that will happen to Nu!k/s but then handily ignores other less-fun bits of TOS. So. there is that.
So, about James Tiberius Kirk:
1. James Tiberius Kirk is not afraid of his middle name. Yeah, he gets that it's a mouthful, and no one in their right mind would ever actually want to be called that on a regular basis, but Kirk likes the way his whole name rolls off his tongue, likes the way it sounds with the word "Captain" splashed in front of it.
2. Jim pretends to be dumber than he actually is because he avoids doing math in his head most times. He's a genius yeah, and that's not common knowledge, but his mind can get a little bit ahead of itself, and Kirk's kind of afraid of going absolutely bat-shit insane if he doesn't keep the numbers under control. He tries not to remember that week back when he was on spring break from Starfleet, when he didn't leave his room once and started writing equations all over his bedroom walls--and then the kitchen and the living room and shit even the bathroom and on the fucking tub when he'd run out of room; he's damn lucky Bones thought he'd had an allergic reaction to something again, because otherwise, Jim might still be in that room writing numbers and variables on top of freshly dried permanent marker, muttering to himself about Schrödinger and Planck and. Fuck. Just, he doesn't do math in his head ok?
3. He loves his ship more than he ever thought he could love an inanimate object. And it's not just that he loves the ship; he loves the Enterprise because she's everything he could hope to find in a woman(ship). She's honest and reliable and gives as good as she takes, and never once has he had to question the crew she holds within her embrace. The Enterprise is home to him, and he'll protect her with every breath that he's got.
4. Jim is vain. Vain like, woah. And he'd always thought he was alone in the universe because he was a lost soul and would never find anyone who understood him. But, amazingly, he's found 400+ people who are just like him on the Enterprise. They're all just a little bit broken, figures they must be if they were willing to take on a 5-year mission into who-the-fuck-knows where, and yeah. He's never been prouder to have his ego busted. There's Sulu, who he's got some sort of awesome, we-almost-died-simultaneously connection with, and Chekov who reminds Jim of himself at 17 except less angry and more willing to embrace the insanity-inducing numbers, and Scotty is totally like his soul-brother or something, with the stashes of retro, x-box games in his quarters and the secret genius and even his weird love of sandwiches, which, all right, on Jim is more of an after-effect of Tarsus IV, but still. Uhura is so awesome he doesn't even want to sleep with her anymore, except he still hits on her just to see her scowl at him; Bones too, for that matter. And then there's Spock, but Jim doesn't like to dwell on Spock because that hurts too much for him.
5. All his life, Jim never understood the point of marriage. He figured it was nobody's business but his own what the hell he did in his personal life, and even wearing like, a wedding ring was too much information to be giving random strangers. And then, he's got Spock, and suddenly, he gets it. He wants to broadcast it daily over the com system: Good morning everyone, this is your Captain speaking, and have I mentioned lately that I am stupid in love? He wants it to be the first thing he says on First Contacts, wants to introduce Spock as his T'hy'la to every goddamn person he meets, and fuck. Has he mentioned lately that he's stupid in love?
And Also, on Nu!Spock:
1. Spock is of the personal opinion that contractions may very well be the first indication that society has at last collapsed into chaos. He refrains from using them in even the most informal of interactions and has never given up the (illogically romantic) idea that he can perhaps contain the damage they have already inflicted upon society.
2. Spock has actively been trying to repair the somewhat dubious relationship he currently has with his father, but finds that he still refers to the man as Sarek in his mind. As a child, he was constantly plagued by fears of inadequacy, and frequently called Sarek 'Sarek' as an attempt to reinforce the notion that he was embracing his Vulcan heritage. It is not until much later--and he is disappointed that he learns this not from his father, but from Ambassador Spock--that his father is still rueful of this. He had not been aware that his father was always proud to be his father. For this, Spock is regretful.
3. There have been several occasions where Spock has gotten the inexplicable urge to say something vulgar, inappropriate, or offensive to the various dignitaries they have met over the course of their mission. He suspects that this is Jim's somewhat negative influence on his emotional control, but as he will neither indulge in these outlandish impulses nor inform Jim of them, he is confident that he will never know for sure.
4. Not a day goes by where he does not miss his mother. It is not logical. It is fruitless. It is a waste of energy and time. He cannot stop.
5. He is fascinated by James Tiberius Kirk, in every way, shape, and form. When he first delved into Jim's mind, he was nearly overwhelmed by the intellect hiding there, smothered by brashness and white noise because Jim is still afraid of the potential that lies therein. He must actively refrain from studying the Captain's lips while on the bridge, as they are a source of infinite distraction to Spock, since the only adjectives that can properly describe them are vulgar, inappropriate, and will never escape the confines of Spock's mind. He is terrified of losing this sparkling example of humanity, would willingly subject himself to anything just to hold Jim in his arms, to grasp Jim's hand in his own (Spock suspects Jim knows of his absurd romanticism, but he has made it a personal goal to one day be able to articulate these notions to Jim without embarrassment or shame).
So, about James Tiberius Kirk:
1. James Tiberius Kirk is not afraid of his middle name. Yeah, he gets that it's a mouthful, and no one in their right mind would ever actually want to be called that on a regular basis, but Kirk likes the way his whole name rolls off his tongue, likes the way it sounds with the word "Captain" splashed in front of it.
2. Jim pretends to be dumber than he actually is because he avoids doing math in his head most times. He's a genius yeah, and that's not common knowledge, but his mind can get a little bit ahead of itself, and Kirk's kind of afraid of going absolutely bat-shit insane if he doesn't keep the numbers under control. He tries not to remember that week back when he was on spring break from Starfleet, when he didn't leave his room once and started writing equations all over his bedroom walls--and then the kitchen and the living room and shit even the bathroom and on the fucking tub when he'd run out of room; he's damn lucky Bones thought he'd had an allergic reaction to something again, because otherwise, Jim might still be in that room writing numbers and variables on top of freshly dried permanent marker, muttering to himself about Schrödinger and Planck and. Fuck. Just, he doesn't do math in his head ok?
3. He loves his ship more than he ever thought he could love an inanimate object. And it's not just that he loves the ship; he loves the Enterprise because she's everything he could hope to find in a woman(ship). She's honest and reliable and gives as good as she takes, and never once has he had to question the crew she holds within her embrace. The Enterprise is home to him, and he'll protect her with every breath that he's got.
4. Jim is vain. Vain like, woah. And he'd always thought he was alone in the universe because he was a lost soul and would never find anyone who understood him. But, amazingly, he's found 400+ people who are just like him on the Enterprise. They're all just a little bit broken, figures they must be if they were willing to take on a 5-year mission into who-the-fuck-knows where, and yeah. He's never been prouder to have his ego busted. There's Sulu, who he's got some sort of awesome, we-almost-died-simultaneously connection with, and Chekov who reminds Jim of himself at 17 except less angry and more willing to embrace the insanity-inducing numbers, and Scotty is totally like his soul-brother or something, with the stashes of retro, x-box games in his quarters and the secret genius and even his weird love of sandwiches, which, all right, on Jim is more of an after-effect of Tarsus IV, but still. Uhura is so awesome he doesn't even want to sleep with her anymore, except he still hits on her just to see her scowl at him; Bones too, for that matter. And then there's Spock, but Jim doesn't like to dwell on Spock because that hurts too much for him.
5. All his life, Jim never understood the point of marriage. He figured it was nobody's business but his own what the hell he did in his personal life, and even wearing like, a wedding ring was too much information to be giving random strangers. And then, he's got Spock, and suddenly, he gets it. He wants to broadcast it daily over the com system: Good morning everyone, this is your Captain speaking, and have I mentioned lately that I am stupid in love? He wants it to be the first thing he says on First Contacts, wants to introduce Spock as his T'hy'la to every goddamn person he meets, and fuck. Has he mentioned lately that he's stupid in love?
And Also, on Nu!Spock:
1. Spock is of the personal opinion that contractions may very well be the first indication that society has at last collapsed into chaos. He refrains from using them in even the most informal of interactions and has never given up the (illogically romantic) idea that he can perhaps contain the damage they have already inflicted upon society.
2. Spock has actively been trying to repair the somewhat dubious relationship he currently has with his father, but finds that he still refers to the man as Sarek in his mind. As a child, he was constantly plagued by fears of inadequacy, and frequently called Sarek 'Sarek' as an attempt to reinforce the notion that he was embracing his Vulcan heritage. It is not until much later--and he is disappointed that he learns this not from his father, but from Ambassador Spock--that his father is still rueful of this. He had not been aware that his father was always proud to be his father. For this, Spock is regretful.
3. There have been several occasions where Spock has gotten the inexplicable urge to say something vulgar, inappropriate, or offensive to the various dignitaries they have met over the course of their mission. He suspects that this is Jim's somewhat negative influence on his emotional control, but as he will neither indulge in these outlandish impulses nor inform Jim of them, he is confident that he will never know for sure.
4. Not a day goes by where he does not miss his mother. It is not logical. It is fruitless. It is a waste of energy and time. He cannot stop.
5. He is fascinated by James Tiberius Kirk, in every way, shape, and form. When he first delved into Jim's mind, he was nearly overwhelmed by the intellect hiding there, smothered by brashness and white noise because Jim is still afraid of the potential that lies therein. He must actively refrain from studying the Captain's lips while on the bridge, as they are a source of infinite distraction to Spock, since the only adjectives that can properly describe them are vulgar, inappropriate, and will never escape the confines of Spock's mind. He is terrified of losing this sparkling example of humanity, would willingly subject himself to anything just to hold Jim in his arms, to grasp Jim's hand in his own (Spock suspects Jim knows of his absurd romanticism, but he has made it a personal goal to one day be able to articulate these notions to Jim without embarrassment or shame).