happy birthday
Happy birthday.
Im updating earlier because i have a lot of stuff to do tonight and apperntly im supposed to go to bed earlier.
Ive completly fallen in love with this song. swoon. its my new favorite. for the time being at least. but i have fallen fast. and hard. lol i swear that one person who does it first, will completly win my heart over. take my heart but please dont break it. whats come over me? am i the victim in this relashonship?
So last night i didnt go to bed till around 4. and also yesterday was the 2 year anniversary of my grandpas death. may he be somewhere better than here.
So i got up at 6:36. and mysteriously my alarm was set to radio instead of alarm. it was actually kinda nice waking up to a voice rather than " EH EH EH!!" right in my face. so i got ready and we left pretty damn late.
I got to school 5 till and i walked fast to class. i saw todd and tj on the way but they had to go. so i went to french.
I was on time and we got back our tests. i did ok on the main one. actually i only missed 2 i think. and then i got like 6 wrong on the other one. or something. so not exactly horrible. and o my fucking god. patrick out of nowhere starts scooting his desk so it makes that sound and is like "it sounds like star wars!" hahaha i was laughing soooo hard. and it does! it sounds like chewbaka! haha nothing really happened in that class. i was tired. and my eye was throbbing. lol
Then me and stepfanie walked to my locker and todd and tj are rapidly trying to open it. except it was the wrong one. and then we were deciding to skip it or go... but i wanted to see megan and aubreys speech so i went. and stepfanie went with steve to the sophmore assembly and todd came with me to the freshmen with me. and we sat on the floor by cassie and joe. i was so cramped. o my god it was so boring! we couldnt see or hear. so cassie decided to rape my hand and kept touching me. we slapt each other a few times. haha and then we tried calling all these people on my phone. haha almost nobdy answered. and todd was listening to numa numa the whole time. haha dork. joe had a vagina, and a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich. i had a bite and i felt like throwing up. then it got over and we just sat there. i saw brandon. so he didnt skip... and we talked to conor too. that silly boy. and we were sooo late. i was like third to last to vote. so we all walked outside in the rain...dont exactly know why. then we went in and i had to go my seperate way.
So i get to math and i am freaking late. yes, freaking. and i got to sit in the good chair for a little bit at my own table. alone at last. and then we had to move. i sat with kristina, andrew, and um..veridiana? i dunno. and we had boring old math class. but since i was so late and it was a shorter period, we left in no time.
And it was raining. but i went up to stepfanie and we went to the piano room all sneaky. and she played me mad world. im soooo learning that. im gonna make a copy. and she played other stuff. shes good. then greg shoved me and i shoved him in a locker. but i hit my face in his shoulder at the same time. the they both dragged me to the cafeteria and then desserted me so i went to the commons and sammie was calling me and then i look like 2 feet to my right and she is standing right there. lol bad news. angel has gone to fly with the angels. god bless her. i will miss her like no other...
From there we went to my locker. and ate. so when i open my locker there are plastic easter eggs everywhere..... haha cassie did it! and all of them had something in them. such as, pencil shavings, lip gloss, cereal, and my favorite..a sock. haha. then me and cassie went outside and were laughing so hard about her grapes and karl walks up and gives us the weirdest looks in our life. and i see guy! then i chased after patrick but he is blind and couldnt hear me. so i went to class. fast.
In health we finished the eating disorder movie. i watched with complete attention. then we did nothing basicly. i completly spaced out. i was thinking about so many things. then we left and i went to the hall.
I got the hic ups( as i do right now) and was talking to krissy, and then cassie. and we went and talked spencer b. while the other one circled..haha
Then we went in class and spencer went with me today. we did pop cans with ben and matt. and be kept saying i needed a kiss. lol ben had like a freak out. he didnt even seem like him. it was wird. then we went back and it was so awkward. so this one lady, whom i forgot her name right now. coles mom though. anyway,
lady: spencer got something at the store. you should ask him what.
me: yea....
lady: hey brandon do you know? did you know he is christinas boyfriend?(she says this quite loudly)
me: um....actually we arent going out any more....
lady: o my gosh. this is why i keep my mouth closed. well, his loss. do i need to teach him something?
me: haha no. no its ok.
Haha i really like her. then we went in the commons and i played ball with ben mostly. i kept getitng hit with the ball. and i played with luke. then i talked to megan about ...something. but i was so excited for her. then my mom came and we left.
We got soda on the way cuz my throat hurts like a mother. and we went and saw lance. so he said my case is really weird to be working so fast. and i dont think im syking myself out either. because now, its not working so well. i find myself wanting to return to those things again and again. im just so busy i have no time to myself. especially right now. but i dont wanna let you down. not after today. and ive noticed i dont like confrontation at all. i avoid it as much as possible. i will bow my head or go a different way, just to avoid people. 70% isnt it.
Anyways, there was 2 really cute guys finally. and i told my mom i hated glenna and didnt wanna see her. she agreed. but she said she would have to ask... so i hope she dies. not really. but GOD i hate this. maybe i will just in spite of her. yes, thats my reason.
Then we went home and i walked the dog. im noticing more nad more that i dont like kids and possibly dont want any. they are so freaking annoying sometimes. i called this kids screaming, little shitheads. and i was like "christina!" cuz normally im good with kids. so who knows. 40's not the greatest year anyways.
Then i talked to jake a little. man, i miss him. we havent talked for a while. hes gonna call me back. im convincing him im not a virgin. pretty funny. i think he expects to be the first. hey..maybe he will. but we deicded we need to go to a concert together. and if i get a wedding date, im bringing him. because he is my friend, and i kinda just wanna bring a friend. plus he knows my family the best out of my guy friends. and i know aaron is dieing to meet the all famous jake.
And i talked to todd. im crashing. ive never actually felt like someones ment such things when they said them. noramlly they say them cuz they have to. but with him, i get a sense he is telling me the truth from his eyes. and it makes my heart beat so fast.
I have to do my gallery review all tonight. its due tomorrow. it shouldnt be too hard. but i need to get working on it. cuz its now 6:26. ive stopped multiple times on writing this.
Im getting sick. sore throat, tired. stupid todd...god this always happens to me. actually only twice. but sheesh. i havent been sick since a long time ago. ruin my record...
My thoughts are completly gong everywhere right now. i cant stop thinking. pausing eveything, and just thinking. about everything.
I dont wanna get hurt this time. so i cant let it get too far. end it before it starts. because thats what i do.
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going no where
Going no where
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen
Sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me
No one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me
Look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world
Au Revoir