Damned If I Do Ya 6/13
Title: Damned If I Do Ya
Author: desperate2break
Rating: U (fer now)
Pairing: Zack Merrick/Oli Sykes
POV: Zack Merrick
Summary: Zack is a born-rich kid with nothing but time on his hands. He knows only luxury and when he wants something, he wants it now. A whole new world is revealed to him when he meets humble Oliver Sykes...
Warnings: Graphic language use, fluff, angst
Dedications: .Whoever invented coffee-flavoured ice-cream. And spoons. Spoons are good.
Disclaimer: I own no one and nothing. But, should anyone want to gift me with anything...
'Zackery,' my mother said quietly when I came down for breakfast on Saturday. We always made it a thing to have meals together at the weekends to kid ourselves that we're an actual family. This Saturday morning in particular, she wore a very grim expression.
'Yes, mother?' I responded, glancing across the table at Gwen.
'Take a seat. I have much to talk to you about.'
'Um okay...'
She took a breath as I sat and shook her head slowly. 'Tell me, Zackery, have I not been good to you? Your father and I? Have we not given all you desire?'
'Well, sure Mom -'
'Then why are you so intent on disgracing us?'
'What are you talking about?'
'I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT BEGGAR I SAW YOU KISSING LAST NIGHT!' She screamed, banging a fist on the table.
It's just the crazy talking, I told myself, she doesn't mean it. Keep calm.
'He's not a beggar, Mom,' I said in the calmest voice I could manage.
'Do you have any idea who his father is? What he does for a living?'
'Yes. His father is a gardener; Oliver helps him.'
'They garden for our friends, Zackery. Do you want to be associated with that?'
'They're people too, Mom! Mr Sykes is the hardest-working man I know and Oli...He's the most...intelligent, beautiful...funniest, most caring person I've ever met...' I looked her dead in the eye. 'And I love him. '
Have mercy on my soul!' my mother gasped, clutching her chest.
'Yes, Mom; you need all the mercy you can get - can't you be happy that your only son has found love?'
'Not when it's with another man!' she spluttered. She looked horrifed for a second, then ploughed on. 'You bring shame onto this family, disregarding everything your father and I have worked for; with your homosexuality!'
I felt my heart drop into my stomach and then dissolve into stomach acid. Still she continued. 'Zackery, I have been tolerant - if not benevolent - towards your fancies; heaven knows how many blind eyes I have turned when it was all over the country club that you had ...sodomised...with the Turman boy. Can you not repay my generosity by simply accepting Kyle Burns as a companion?'
I could hardly believe my ears.
'Your generosity?' I shrieked, 'what generosity, Mom? Finally realising I'll never marry Jack's sister? Setting me up with some boy I don't even like? If you were generous at all, you'd accept all of me -'
'DON'T YOU TALK TO ME ABOUT ACCEPTANCE, ZACKERY STEVEN MERRICK!!'
'-Oh I think I should, mother; you'd allow your son to die of unhappiness than have some old prunes at the country club turn up their noses at you?'
She eyed me for a while, then said very quietly:
'You are no son of mine.'
I released a shaky breath, then turned on my heel and left, hearing Gwen softly chastising her. Fuck it.
I figured I could go to the only place I was unconditionally welcome, so I called Rian for the address, and within ten minutes found myself pacing outside the Sykes House. Mr Sykes himself, a spitting image of his son, was visible through the open front door.
'Zack!' he beamed, pausing his whistling to invite me in.
'Hi, Sir. Is Oli in?' I asked, looking around the kitchen. There were cracks on the wall, the tap was dripping badly, and the table was wobbling precariously on one knobbly leg.
'He's in his room,' Mr Sykes replied good-naturedly. 'I'm afraid he's still asleep - he was helping me since 3 o' clock this morning, bless his little heart. I worry about him sometimes...' I bowed my head. 'Say, Zack, you had breakfast yet? I'm scrambling some eggs...'
'No, thank you, Sir. I -I don't have any appetite. So - er - Oli's room?'
'Last one you come to; with all the drawings everywhere. Go wake him up - he'll be pleased to see you.'
I followed his instructions; the house was relatively small and poky as I walked through it. I caught a glimpse of the living room - it was a tiny area with a couple of rugs scattered around and a little table in the centre littered with half-finished portraits. There was no TV and the curtains at the windows were ragged at the edges.
Oli's room wasn't much either. The only thing remotely pretty about it was the picture of a sunset on the door; I knew he'd drawn it because it was the exact one we'd watched together previously. His room was literally a space with a bed by the small window and a miniscule wardrobe in the corner but it smelt like a garden. Made sense. The walls were drawn on; his own drawings - there was one of me above the wardrobe. It made me smile, but the rest of his room brought a lump to my throat. Nothing was....nice.
I found Oli himself sprawled out on his bed, lying on his stomach, one arm flung over Francis. He was topless, bottom half covered by the thin blue sheets, and his mouth was slightly open. I carefully took a seat on the side and lightly stroked his long hair.
'Nnnn,' he mumbled, stirring from sleep.
'Shhh,' I hushed, and kissed his forehead.
'I wanna kiss you...'
'That's how you greet your dad every morning?'
'I knew it was you.' He smiled and turned over on his back. 'Heard you talking. And walking. You walk like a girl. The sound of your footsteps.'
'Yeah well...If I wasn't so desperate to see you, I'd take offence.'
'Why, what's wrong?' He squinted at me, then rubbed his tired eyes and patted the space beside him for me to lay there.
I sighed and held him as he snuggled closer. His skin was warm and soft and if I pressed slightly, I could feel the delicate bones of his ribcage.
'It's my Mom,' I said. 'She....doesn't like the idea of us. Well, she doesn't like the idea of me being gay. She actually hates it.'
I'm sorry, Zack.'
'Me too. I wish she wasn't my Mom.'
'You don't mean that.'
'Yes I do.' I exhaled and closed my eyes. 'You should've seen the look on her face when I told her I'm in love with you.'
He laced his slender fingers with mine, so I could feel every bump and crack and callous on his palm.
'Is there a difference between loving someone and being in love with them?' he asked me.
'Yes. Definitely.'
'I think so too. Do you both me?'
'Yes, with all my heart.'
'I both you too. And you'll never ever leave me?'
'Never ever.'
'I'm seventeen. Say it seventeen times.'
I took a deep breath. 'I promise to never ever -' I counted out sixteen more "evers" on my fingers, making him giggle in delight '-leave you. Ever. See, one extra.'
He pressed a kiss to my cheek and then rolled off the bed; seconds later I heard the shower go off and the pipes gurgle. I got up and went over to the bathroom, watching him brush his perfect teeth in just a towel. My thoughts turned to my mother; was I prepared to - if it came to it - leave my entire world behind for this boy? Leave my friends? Leave Gwen? Could I honestly walk away from everything I've ever known?
He caught my eye through the mirror and grinned at me toothpastily; I knew the answer was yes.
'C'mere,' I muttered, sliding my palm into his and drawing him nearer.
'Ash shong?' he asked through intense fluoride foam, toothbrush dangling by his side.
I shook my head and put my hands to his face, grabbing him closer so I could kiss him. He kissed me back and the river of toothpaste in his mouth spilled into mine but I didn't care. A long while later he pushed me away, panting for air. His face was pink from holding his breath yet I couldn't stop.
'Please,' I begged, holding his face again. 'One more....Please.'
He gazed at me, set down his toothbrush on the ledge, and gently wiped minty foam from my chin. Then he leaned in and kissed me so passionately my knees felt weak.
'God, I love you, Oliver,' I sighed, hugging his waist tight.
'I love you too,' he replied. Then he gave my head a sharp poke. 'And don't call me Oliver.'
As it was Saturday and the one day of the week that the Sykes's had off from work, I hung out with them all day.
As of right now, Mr Sykes was cleaning the sink and countertops and Oli and I sat on the kitchen floor, repairing a vase.
'So would you like to talk about it?'
I raised an eyebrow at my love and then frowned. 'About what?'
'About why you're so upset,' he answered easily, peeling glue from his fingers. 'I mean, you don't have to. I just thought...'
He could read me so well, there was no point trying to evade him. 'It's my mom,' I confessed. 'I told you about it before. It's still bugging me, I guess.'
'What exactly did she say?'
'She said I'm no son of hers and brought up some stuff that was best left in the past...Basically disowned me.'
'You can always be my son, Zackery,' Mr Sykes quipped good-humouredly from the counter.
'Thanks, Sir.'
'Aww noooooo, Dad,' Oli cut in with a whine. 'You can't adopt my boyfriend - that would be incest!' He winked at me in this way that made my stomach flip a complete 360 degrees. 'Anyway. Continue, Zack.'
I grinned a little. 'I dunno....I'm trying not to take it personally cuz, well, my mom's mentally ill...she probably didn't mean it.' I took a breath. 'Who am I kidding? She'd hate me anyway.'
'Just because you're not straight? That's fucked up.'
'....My folks...they're not like your dad.'
'Well, I say "follow your heart", Zackery,' Mr Sykes offered up. 'Whether that be with a - er- um - female or um - a- ehem...'
'My dad's not great with sexuality and such,' Oli grinned. 'Right, Dad?'
'Ah, well, it's whatever makes you happy, Son, nothing to do with me.' He turned to me. 'But seriously, Zack, if you ever need a bed, you are always welcome here.'
'Thanks, Sir -'
'You mean with me, in my bed, Dad?'
Mr Sykes blushed at his son's teasing, as said son cackled cheerfully.
I laughed.
Only Oli could make me forget the world.