funny how things look the same...
ive got a broken nose and a jack daniels induced stomach ache. party at tim's, drunk ecw antics, the usual suspects, you know the stories.
i havent been able to get to sleep lately. being up till 5-6am kinda sucks. especially on work nights. i thought i had this shit beat. i was doing good with it for a while, sleeping at normal times, not freaking out about things. its not as bad before, but id give anything to get a little rest.
the jobs been going good. i got the hang of everything. its not bad at all. i dont mind going, although id rather not. but i guess thats how jobs work. i couldnt think of a better working-class type job to have, so its not all bad. and the moneys nice.
i havent had a lo of time for music lately, and it kills me. i havent been getting my usual 6 hours of practice in a day. my callouses are starting to suffer. i dont want my fingers tog et stiff. i need to fix this. a martin backpacker at work? ill have to look into that. i havent had much time to listen to it either. although i highly recommend the works of orchestra baobab, and ali fakar toure. thats all
i kinda feel like shit though, im not unhappy, per se. i just think i could be doing more good. i dont think ive done enough. i havent repented enough. ive done alot of bad things, and i dont want that. i hate that i cant erase them, im not ok with the random sex, the stealing, lyings, hurting people etc. i dont want that, i dont want people to remember that. i can do better. and i will do better. i just need to embrace and focus more on what im trying to do. i know the words, i need to know what they mean, and i need to live them. its all i can do, and i should do no less. basically, i gotta try harder.
thats pretty much all thats on my my mind. besides that, i hope my friends know i love them all. really. my friends are my family. were all calculaters, cuz we can count on eachother. and lifting a joke from a foot locker commercial means its time for this one to lay down.
g'night. god bless
i havent been able to get to sleep lately. being up till 5-6am kinda sucks. especially on work nights. i thought i had this shit beat. i was doing good with it for a while, sleeping at normal times, not freaking out about things. its not as bad before, but id give anything to get a little rest.
the jobs been going good. i got the hang of everything. its not bad at all. i dont mind going, although id rather not. but i guess thats how jobs work. i couldnt think of a better working-class type job to have, so its not all bad. and the moneys nice.
i havent had a lo of time for music lately, and it kills me. i havent been getting my usual 6 hours of practice in a day. my callouses are starting to suffer. i dont want my fingers tog et stiff. i need to fix this. a martin backpacker at work? ill have to look into that. i havent had much time to listen to it either. although i highly recommend the works of orchestra baobab, and ali fakar toure. thats all
i kinda feel like shit though, im not unhappy, per se. i just think i could be doing more good. i dont think ive done enough. i havent repented enough. ive done alot of bad things, and i dont want that. i hate that i cant erase them, im not ok with the random sex, the stealing, lyings, hurting people etc. i dont want that, i dont want people to remember that. i can do better. and i will do better. i just need to embrace and focus more on what im trying to do. i know the words, i need to know what they mean, and i need to live them. its all i can do, and i should do no less. basically, i gotta try harder.
thats pretty much all thats on my my mind. besides that, i hope my friends know i love them all. really. my friends are my family. were all calculaters, cuz we can count on eachother. and lifting a joke from a foot locker commercial means its time for this one to lay down.
g'night. god bless