Cut Out My Tongue So I Speak No Excuse (Prologue)
Title: Cut Out My Tongue So I Speak No Excuse
Author: Ceara cearaorly
Pairing: Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth (Jalex)
Rating: NC-17 (but not until chapter 1, I'm not sure what to rate this.)
Summary: If keeping his mouth shut would stop the pain he'd do it. He'd never speak again if keeping his mouth shut made everything stop.
Notes: Jack is mute after being forced to watch May get raped and both of them suffer through mental and physical abuse. There will be descriptive scenes of this encounter but whenever it happens it'll be warned where it is in the chapter so it can easily be skipped over if it bothers anyone. Title cred belongs to Hate - Get Scared
tumblr :-)
Alex had hardly stopped the car when he yanked the keys out of the ignition and raced through the hospital doors, straight for the front desk. He groaned loudly, pacing from foot to foot as he waited for the never ending line to bring him to the desk for his information.
“Fuck this!” He shouted out, throwing his hands up in the air, taking off full speed towards the elevator. He stabbed repeatedly at the up button, “COME THE FUCK ON!” He screamed, not even concerned with anyone else in the hospital. As the doors slid open he all but ran in, going to hit his next button but realized he didn’t know. He had nothing for information. He screamed a random slew of words, kicking at the closed doors before sliding down to the floor, curling up in the corner and letting himself finally break down. He didn’t even glance up as he heard the distinct ping of the elevator and the woosh and slide of the doors opening.
“...Lex? Holy shit, Alex! What the fuck are you doing here?” Rian choked out, hissing as the hot Starbucks beverage burned his tongue and throat. “Lexie, what, how, what?” He mumbled, making his way closer to Alex’s crumpled up form.
Alex merely whimpered, glancing up at Rian, his vision blurry from tears. He dug his hands into his eyes, taking quick, hicuppy breaths that always follow from hysterical crying. “W-where. I-is. J-J-Jack?” He whimpered out as Rian sighed and grabbed onto his arm, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Last I knew he was sleeping, Zack was trying to lure some words out of him.” Rian paused, inching Alex and him close to the door so he could hit the correct floor button and take them to Jack’s room. Alex let out a deep breath, feeling himself relax at the news of Jack being alive.
“W-Why? What.. happened?”
“Let’s... wait until we can sit down, okay? Matt and Danny are there too.”
Alex nodded, nuzzling his face into Rian’s neck as the elevator took them up to the 7th floor. When the ping finally sounded and the doors whooshed open Alex wasted no time grabbing onto Rian’s hand and running towards Danny and Matt. When Matt spotted Alex and Rian he gritted his teeth, turning swiftly towards Danny.
“The fuck?! You called him?! What about waiting? Hmm?” He hissed, eyes shooting daggers.
“I... Shit, Flyzik! It’s his best fucking friend! They’re always together, he must of it least felt something was off. How could I not fuckin’ call him?”
“Exactly, his best fucking friend! His best friend who had to witness his own sister be brutally raped by 5 guys, and not only watch her be mentally and physically abused but have the same abuse for himself! Jack’s hardly conscious, do you know what seeing him is going to do to Ale-” He stopped abruptly as Alex approached them. “H-Hey Lex!”
Alex ignored him completely, staring only at Danny. “DANNY, Where is he? What happened? Why did you hang up so fast?” Alex was shooting a million questions at him, as Rian tried to pull the boy away and set him down.
Rian shot Danny a look of death upon hearing Alex’s words. “You were the one to call him?!”
“I.. I.. Uh.. I need some coffee!” Danny stammered out, quickly scurrying off to avoid the guilt.
“Why won’t anyone tell me anything? What the fuck happened!” Alex whined out, stomping his foot like a child. “I just want to fucking know where my best friend is! Fucking christ!” He yelled.
“Sir... I’m going to have to ask you to leave if your language doesn’t clean itself up.” A nurse from the front desk called out. Shooting Matt and Rian disgusted looks for not controlling him better.
“S-sorry! He’s upset..” Matt squeaked out, grabbing onto Alex’s waist and yanking him into the chair next to him. “Now, SHH!” Matt hissed, giving him a stern look.
“Don’t tell me SHHH! I wanna know where Jack is! Why won’t you tell me?!”
“Lex, come on! Keep your voice down before we’re all thrown out! We.. we were planning on telling you. We.. just wanted to wait until we knew Jack was alright and-”
“He’s not alright? Ri, you TOLD me he was sleeping and Zack wa-
Matt quickly cut the two bickering boys off again, “Alex, what Rian is saying is that sure, Jack is physically okay, minus the broken ribs, black eye, spilt lip and broken nose, but mentally he’s fucked now.”
“W-What? Why?”
“He’s.. stable but.. Jack hasn’t been able to speak since he and May were found.”
“What? Jack is never able to stop talking, he never shuts the fuck up...” Alex laughed, realization on his face. “I know now, this is a fucked up joke you guys played to scare me because tomorrow’s Halloween! Ha-ha! Very funny assholes!” He smirked, shaking his head. “You guys almost got me too, I really thought Jack wasn’t oka-”
“Lex... Lex, ALEX, stop! This.. this isn’t a trick. Bad shit seriously happened tonight, May was raped, and Jack had to watch it all happen to her-” Rian was cut short as Zack opened a door a few feet away from them. Alex’s ears perked like a small dog, his eyes lighting up when he spotted Zack. He didn’t even waste a second before he dove out of Matt’s lax grip and all but crashed into Zack’s muscular frame.
“Zack! It’s Jack in there right? I can’t wait to see his face when he sees his stupid joke blew up in his face!” Alex snickered, oblivious to Zack’s confused expression.
“Joke? Alex, what the fuck? What are you even doing here? How did you find out? Rian!?” He quickly stammered out, pushing Alex back from the door and blocking the view.
Alex sighed, giving up defeat as he turned around to see Rian slowly making his way over towards them. Zack foolishly let go of Alex and moved the slightest bit to far from the door. He wasn’t quick enough to grab onto Alex who dodged him and tumbled through the door, right to the foot fo the hospital bed.
“Haha! You fucker! You really thought you were going to trick me on this, and even allowing the hospital to set you.. up.. like.. oh.” The laughter left his voice, replaced with horror and shock as he saw Jack’s appearance. Bandages were wrapped around his face, nose, eyes and crown of his head. His wrist had a brace on it, as did his neck, where dark purple finger shapes were shown. He choked out a sob, flying over to Jack’s bedside and grabbing his hand. “J-Jacky? W-what?”
Jack slowly opened his eyes, startled by the loud yelling and stomping of Alex’s arrival to the room. He was as shocked as the rest of them. Zack told him they weren’t telling Alex yet, not wanting to freak him out. Jack didn’t argue, he couldn’t if he even wanted too. No sound was able to escape his voice, he had absolutely no means of communication. All he could manage was giving Alex a lopsided grin. Mouthing out the word “Lexie!”
Alex grinned, tightening his grip on Jack’s hand. “Jack, why aren’t you talking? Come on, talk!”
Jack opened his mouth, but quickly slammed his mouth shut, eyes widening in fear at the thought of talking again. He frowned, shaking his head no. Already being ashamed and scared for merely lipping to Alex.
He couldn’t talk anymore, he couldn’t create more pain. The only way he could stop the pain was by keeping his mouth shut. He just wanted to stop the pain.
Author: Ceara cearaorly
Pairing: Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth (Jalex)
Rating: NC-17 (but not until chapter 1, I'm not sure what to rate this.)
Summary: If keeping his mouth shut would stop the pain he'd do it. He'd never speak again if keeping his mouth shut made everything stop.
Notes: Jack is mute after being forced to watch May get raped and both of them suffer through mental and physical abuse. There will be descriptive scenes of this encounter but whenever it happens it'll be warned where it is in the chapter so it can easily be skipped over if it bothers anyone. Title cred belongs to Hate - Get Scared
tumblr :-)
Alex had hardly stopped the car when he yanked the keys out of the ignition and raced through the hospital doors, straight for the front desk. He groaned loudly, pacing from foot to foot as he waited for the never ending line to bring him to the desk for his information.
“Fuck this!” He shouted out, throwing his hands up in the air, taking off full speed towards the elevator. He stabbed repeatedly at the up button, “COME THE FUCK ON!” He screamed, not even concerned with anyone else in the hospital. As the doors slid open he all but ran in, going to hit his next button but realized he didn’t know. He had nothing for information. He screamed a random slew of words, kicking at the closed doors before sliding down to the floor, curling up in the corner and letting himself finally break down. He didn’t even glance up as he heard the distinct ping of the elevator and the woosh and slide of the doors opening.
“...Lex? Holy shit, Alex! What the fuck are you doing here?” Rian choked out, hissing as the hot Starbucks beverage burned his tongue and throat. “Lexie, what, how, what?” He mumbled, making his way closer to Alex’s crumpled up form.
Alex merely whimpered, glancing up at Rian, his vision blurry from tears. He dug his hands into his eyes, taking quick, hicuppy breaths that always follow from hysterical crying. “W-where. I-is. J-J-Jack?” He whimpered out as Rian sighed and grabbed onto his arm, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Last I knew he was sleeping, Zack was trying to lure some words out of him.” Rian paused, inching Alex and him close to the door so he could hit the correct floor button and take them to Jack’s room. Alex let out a deep breath, feeling himself relax at the news of Jack being alive.
“W-Why? What.. happened?”
“Let’s... wait until we can sit down, okay? Matt and Danny are there too.”
Alex nodded, nuzzling his face into Rian’s neck as the elevator took them up to the 7th floor. When the ping finally sounded and the doors whooshed open Alex wasted no time grabbing onto Rian’s hand and running towards Danny and Matt. When Matt spotted Alex and Rian he gritted his teeth, turning swiftly towards Danny.
“The fuck?! You called him?! What about waiting? Hmm?” He hissed, eyes shooting daggers.
“I... Shit, Flyzik! It’s his best fucking friend! They’re always together, he must of it least felt something was off. How could I not fuckin’ call him?”
“Exactly, his best fucking friend! His best friend who had to witness his own sister be brutally raped by 5 guys, and not only watch her be mentally and physically abused but have the same abuse for himself! Jack’s hardly conscious, do you know what seeing him is going to do to Ale-” He stopped abruptly as Alex approached them. “H-Hey Lex!”
Alex ignored him completely, staring only at Danny. “DANNY, Where is he? What happened? Why did you hang up so fast?” Alex was shooting a million questions at him, as Rian tried to pull the boy away and set him down.
Rian shot Danny a look of death upon hearing Alex’s words. “You were the one to call him?!”
“I.. I.. Uh.. I need some coffee!” Danny stammered out, quickly scurrying off to avoid the guilt.
“Why won’t anyone tell me anything? What the fuck happened!” Alex whined out, stomping his foot like a child. “I just want to fucking know where my best friend is! Fucking christ!” He yelled.
“Sir... I’m going to have to ask you to leave if your language doesn’t clean itself up.” A nurse from the front desk called out. Shooting Matt and Rian disgusted looks for not controlling him better.
“S-sorry! He’s upset..” Matt squeaked out, grabbing onto Alex’s waist and yanking him into the chair next to him. “Now, SHH!” Matt hissed, giving him a stern look.
“Don’t tell me SHHH! I wanna know where Jack is! Why won’t you tell me?!”
“Lex, come on! Keep your voice down before we’re all thrown out! We.. we were planning on telling you. We.. just wanted to wait until we knew Jack was alright and-”
“He’s not alright? Ri, you TOLD me he was sleeping and Zack wa-
Matt quickly cut the two bickering boys off again, “Alex, what Rian is saying is that sure, Jack is physically okay, minus the broken ribs, black eye, spilt lip and broken nose, but mentally he’s fucked now.”
“W-What? Why?”
“He’s.. stable but.. Jack hasn’t been able to speak since he and May were found.”
“What? Jack is never able to stop talking, he never shuts the fuck up...” Alex laughed, realization on his face. “I know now, this is a fucked up joke you guys played to scare me because tomorrow’s Halloween! Ha-ha! Very funny assholes!” He smirked, shaking his head. “You guys almost got me too, I really thought Jack wasn’t oka-”
“Lex... Lex, ALEX, stop! This.. this isn’t a trick. Bad shit seriously happened tonight, May was raped, and Jack had to watch it all happen to her-” Rian was cut short as Zack opened a door a few feet away from them. Alex’s ears perked like a small dog, his eyes lighting up when he spotted Zack. He didn’t even waste a second before he dove out of Matt’s lax grip and all but crashed into Zack’s muscular frame.
“Zack! It’s Jack in there right? I can’t wait to see his face when he sees his stupid joke blew up in his face!” Alex snickered, oblivious to Zack’s confused expression.
“Joke? Alex, what the fuck? What are you even doing here? How did you find out? Rian!?” He quickly stammered out, pushing Alex back from the door and blocking the view.
Alex sighed, giving up defeat as he turned around to see Rian slowly making his way over towards them. Zack foolishly let go of Alex and moved the slightest bit to far from the door. He wasn’t quick enough to grab onto Alex who dodged him and tumbled through the door, right to the foot fo the hospital bed.
“Haha! You fucker! You really thought you were going to trick me on this, and even allowing the hospital to set you.. up.. like.. oh.” The laughter left his voice, replaced with horror and shock as he saw Jack’s appearance. Bandages were wrapped around his face, nose, eyes and crown of his head. His wrist had a brace on it, as did his neck, where dark purple finger shapes were shown. He choked out a sob, flying over to Jack’s bedside and grabbing his hand. “J-Jacky? W-what?”
Jack slowly opened his eyes, startled by the loud yelling and stomping of Alex’s arrival to the room. He was as shocked as the rest of them. Zack told him they weren’t telling Alex yet, not wanting to freak him out. Jack didn’t argue, he couldn’t if he even wanted too. No sound was able to escape his voice, he had absolutely no means of communication. All he could manage was giving Alex a lopsided grin. Mouthing out the word “Lexie!”
Alex grinned, tightening his grip on Jack’s hand. “Jack, why aren’t you talking? Come on, talk!”
Jack opened his mouth, but quickly slammed his mouth shut, eyes widening in fear at the thought of talking again. He frowned, shaking his head no. Already being ashamed and scared for merely lipping to Alex.
He couldn’t talk anymore, he couldn’t create more pain. The only way he could stop the pain was by keeping his mouth shut. He just wanted to stop the pain.