muses_w_remotes | 11.5. Absolutely Fabulous quote
11.5. "Yes, dear. Sometimes you get into a porn loop and just can't get out."
| Absolutely Fabulous
Co-written with chasemd, justalilcontact & hrtsevrytime | Set 16th March
[Follows THIS]
Rogue wasn't naive enough to believe that once her water broke the birth would be over in the blink of an eye. After all, it was a baby coming out of a very small hole, and she figured that at least something had to happen for the tiny human to make the journey. But six hours into it, walking down the hall--well, waddling in her case--and she was ready to pack up and go home. She couldn't take much more pain, and she sure as hell couldn't handle the walking. She puffed out her cheeks as she tried to work on her breathing again, willing Mia to make her appearance. Her hand gripped Chase's arm, gloved fingers digging in as she held onto him tightly.
"I can't do this anymore! I can't take another damn second of walkin' up this corridor. I wanna go home and sit on the couch and just wait while I watch TV. Why can't I sit and wait? Why does there have to be movin'? I want my Spongebob DVDs!"
Chase was covered from neck to toe in preparation for anything that might happen in the blink of an eye. He had latex gloves on his hands, a tight long-sleeved t-shirt under his blue scrubs and even surgical covers over his feet. He had requested all the staff assisting in Rogue's delivery to be similarly attired, no matter what or how far off delivering she was. So far, things were going okay. At least, from a medical point of view. From a husband point of view, Chase felt it was a small miracle he hadn't wet his pants in panic. He supported Rogue against him, making sure he had a hold on her that meant he could catch her if she got weak and couldn't stay up, and he looked at her with wide eyes. "You can't just have Spongebob DVDs to watch on the couch! You have to have a baby first," he insisted, trying to remain calm. "Walking is good. It encourages her to move and it helps with your pain. Just a few more minutes, babe. You can do it!"
"No, I can't!" Rogue protested, pouting to the best of her ability. She felt a wave of tears threaten to break as she looked at Chase, trying to struggle through a couple more steps. She was starting to get tired, and running away and hiding seemed like a really good idea. "Why can't I have Spongebob?! I want my Spongebob DVDs. Can't I watch 'em in the maternity ward? They got TVs and stuff, right? Please, I need it! It might drive Mia out."
Chase looked at her and then her pregnant stomach and then back to her face. He was worried what the effect on the baby would be if she was born watching Spongebob. Chase may never be able to escape the weirdness off it. He blinked a couple of times. "Don't you want James Bond or Die Hard instead?!" he cried with a nod for emphasis. "It's educational! She will know how to kick arse!"
"Ya gonna die hard in a second if ya don't get me my damn Spongebob!" Rogue told him through clenched teeth as she got hit with a contraction. "I don't wanna watch crap gettin' blown up. It's my crack! It'll help me relax..." She turned away as she tried to breathe, switching between shallow pants and deep breaths. "When you're the one givin' birth, you can watch whatever the fuck ya want."
Chase literally jumped at the tone of her voice and quickly fumbled his cell phone from his scrubs pocket. "You saying 'It's my crack' right now really shouldn't be hot, should it?" he asked hastily, flicking through the numbers on his phone. "Who am I calling? Who will know what the hell a Spongebob is and where to find it in our house?" he asked distractedly.
"No, but if ya didn't find things hot at weird moments ya wouldn't be my husband," Rogue replied, starting to calm when she realised he was going to get her Spongebob. "I don't know... Logan?"
Chase's eyebrows shot up. "Should I be worried Logan knows what a Spongebob is? Oh fuck, please don't tell me he likes it too? The bloke is a sponge in pants! That is more scary than, like, clowns or that ghost in the library at the start of Ghostbusters!" Even still, he found Logan's number and hit the call button, putting the phone to his ear to wait for the answer. He kept urging Rogue to take a few steps with him, even if he was risking his balls being separated from his person.
"No, he doesn't like it! He's just had to watch it with me whenever he's come visit. Punishment for disappearin' on me for long weeks at a time." Rogue was still pouting a little at having to walk, but she managed to follow Chase's urgings. As they passed a supplies closet, her head cocked as she thought she heard something. "Hey... can ya hear that? Sounds like Logan's ringtone." Not that Logan's ringtone was anything special. The man hated anything other than just a normal ring. And even then he hated having a cell in the first place.
Chase frowned, turning to look at the supply closet and then put the phone down to study it, making sure it was ringing. "Supply closets don't ring. I should know. I've spent enough time in them," he added distractedly. He led Rogue over a couple of paces to the railing on the wall and then went to the closet, pulling the door open abruptly. The ringing emitting louder as he did, but that was the last thing he noticed. He choked on a gasp of shock and smacked a hand over his mouth. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO CAMERON?!" he demanded.
Logan was giving Cameron a good hard fuck... which he would have thought was obvious to someone like Chase, but apparently he also suffered from 'pregnant brain'. There was a growl that issued from his lips as he turned his head to look at Rogue's doctor, eyes flashing in warning. Then it seemed to sink in that he was balls-deep in Allison Cameron, his secret lover for months now... and they had an audience. An audience that didn't even know he was seeing her. He paused, and looked at her, his tongue flicking out to wet his lips. "Fuck..."
Cameron didn't even realise what was going on at first. A grunted and hushed agreement between them had briefly and distractedly came for him not to answer his phone. That should've been the end of it and it should've led to a really fantastic orgasm. But noooo. That was too easy. Still, her irritation and frustration was quickly zapped when she realised Chase was standing at the door now all red-faced and horrified, Logan had stopped moving, and none of this could lead to anything good, let alone a climax. She squeaked in surprised and pulled back, quickly shoving her skirt down and raking her fingers through her ruffled hair. "I... um... we... I..." she stammered and put her hand to her lips, waving a little with her other. "Hi."
Rogue was growing impatient, even if stopping had been what she'd wanted. "What's goin' on?! What's Logan doin' to Cameron in the closet? I can't see!" Rogue pushed off the wall and grabbed onto Chase's shoulder so she could join him in the doorway. She just looked between Logan and Cameron before her gaze settled on the older mutant and she glared at him. "You're in there havin' sex while I'm in serious amounts of pain tryin' to push out a kid?! What the fuck do ya think you're doin', bub? I can't even have sex for six damn weeks after this. How dare ya be havin' orgasms when I can't!"
Logan blinked at Rogue's tirade before he thought to tuck himself in and zip up his jeans. "I..." He really had no excuse other than Cameron drove him crazy every time she was near him. His hand might have even brushed against her ass lightly before he cleared his throat and folded his arms across his broad chest. "Shouldn't ya be lyin' in bed, or somethin'?" His gaze flicked to Chase. "Why ain't she in bed? Why are ya makin' her walk around when she's about to pop?"
"We want her to pop!" Chase shrieked in exasperation and threw his hands up in the air. He waved one in Logan and Cameron's direction, looking himself like he was about to explode. "YOU'RE HAVING SEX!" he declared and pointed accusingly, shock obviously not his friend.
Cameron folded her arms across her chest and raised an eyebrow (somewhere in that action realising her bra had gone AWOL). "Like you're uncommon to that turn of events," she said with a smirk. Her eyes flicked between Chase and Rogue, then up to Logan with a small clear of her throat. "We were just... waiting constructively," she offered and stepped out of the closet, giving Logan a perfect view right down the front of her blouse.
Logan took full advantage of the view, a smirk tugging at his lips. He really did love this woman. The revelation didn't even phase him. "Stop focusin' on us, and get back to your wife."
Rogue looked between all three now. "Oh, who cares if they're havin' sex! More power to 'em, but if I either don't get this kid outta me soon, or someone doesn't get me my Spongebob then I am rippin' both your dicks off. And there will be no sex for anyone ever. Except me and Cameron who will enjoy a beautiful lesbian affair."
Chase had been all prepared to keep shrieking in protest, as one generally does when they discover their ex is fucking the godfather-to-be of his almost daughter in a closet he was pretty sure he had fucked in at some point in the past. But at Rogue's last statement, he froze, mouth dropping open which soon broke into an indulgent grin as the image alone whipped through his mind. He caught Logan's eyes and nodded between Rogue and Cameron with a smirk.
Cameron ran her tongue along her upper lip and glanced at Rogue. "You know, blenders are really good for severed dicks, I hear," she said casually.
Rogue nodded as she turned towards Cameron and gripped the other woman's arm. "I hear that, too. Plus it'll finally answer the question about whether or not Logan can grow his back."
Logan had been frowning, not really going along with Chase's smirk. The image mostly disturbed him since he considered Rogue like his best friend, or little sister. He growled quietly and reached out a hand to give Chase a light slap to the back of his head. "Focus, bub."
Chase blinked again and then looked up at Logan with a frown. "Can you really grow your dick back?" he asked, that attention span of his waning yet again.
Cameron shook her head and seized Chase's hand roughly, dragging him back to Rogue's side. "You're trying to have a kid here, you two. Rob, don't make me do something to sever your chances of fathering anymore children. You take care of your dick and I'll take care of Logan's," she added, trying to hide a smirk.
Rogue gripped onto Chase's arm, not really caring by this point who she was holding onto. But it was nice to have her husband back to her side. "Can I please just go lie down now?"
Something seemed to shift back in focus in Chase's brain and the shock of the closet encounter was tucked to the back of his mind, no doubt to be revisited later when he realised exactly what had just been discovered. "No, just a bit further, babe," he urged and then shot Cameron and Logan a Look. "I'm paying one of my staff to keep closet watch throughout the hospital," he warned pointedly. "And no more talk of my cock or lesbians because these scrubs really don't hide anything."
He nodded at them and then turned back to Rogue. "How about Star Wars? Star Wars has crack!"
Word Count | 2,042
| Absolutely Fabulous
Co-written with chasemd, justalilcontact & hrtsevrytime | Set 16th March
[Follows THIS]
Rogue wasn't naive enough to believe that once her water broke the birth would be over in the blink of an eye. After all, it was a baby coming out of a very small hole, and she figured that at least something had to happen for the tiny human to make the journey. But six hours into it, walking down the hall--well, waddling in her case--and she was ready to pack up and go home. She couldn't take much more pain, and she sure as hell couldn't handle the walking. She puffed out her cheeks as she tried to work on her breathing again, willing Mia to make her appearance. Her hand gripped Chase's arm, gloved fingers digging in as she held onto him tightly.
"I can't do this anymore! I can't take another damn second of walkin' up this corridor. I wanna go home and sit on the couch and just wait while I watch TV. Why can't I sit and wait? Why does there have to be movin'? I want my Spongebob DVDs!"
Chase was covered from neck to toe in preparation for anything that might happen in the blink of an eye. He had latex gloves on his hands, a tight long-sleeved t-shirt under his blue scrubs and even surgical covers over his feet. He had requested all the staff assisting in Rogue's delivery to be similarly attired, no matter what or how far off delivering she was. So far, things were going okay. At least, from a medical point of view. From a husband point of view, Chase felt it was a small miracle he hadn't wet his pants in panic. He supported Rogue against him, making sure he had a hold on her that meant he could catch her if she got weak and couldn't stay up, and he looked at her with wide eyes. "You can't just have Spongebob DVDs to watch on the couch! You have to have a baby first," he insisted, trying to remain calm. "Walking is good. It encourages her to move and it helps with your pain. Just a few more minutes, babe. You can do it!"
"No, I can't!" Rogue protested, pouting to the best of her ability. She felt a wave of tears threaten to break as she looked at Chase, trying to struggle through a couple more steps. She was starting to get tired, and running away and hiding seemed like a really good idea. "Why can't I have Spongebob?! I want my Spongebob DVDs. Can't I watch 'em in the maternity ward? They got TVs and stuff, right? Please, I need it! It might drive Mia out."
Chase looked at her and then her pregnant stomach and then back to her face. He was worried what the effect on the baby would be if she was born watching Spongebob. Chase may never be able to escape the weirdness off it. He blinked a couple of times. "Don't you want James Bond or Die Hard instead?!" he cried with a nod for emphasis. "It's educational! She will know how to kick arse!"
"Ya gonna die hard in a second if ya don't get me my damn Spongebob!" Rogue told him through clenched teeth as she got hit with a contraction. "I don't wanna watch crap gettin' blown up. It's my crack! It'll help me relax..." She turned away as she tried to breathe, switching between shallow pants and deep breaths. "When you're the one givin' birth, you can watch whatever the fuck ya want."
Chase literally jumped at the tone of her voice and quickly fumbled his cell phone from his scrubs pocket. "You saying 'It's my crack' right now really shouldn't be hot, should it?" he asked hastily, flicking through the numbers on his phone. "Who am I calling? Who will know what the hell a Spongebob is and where to find it in our house?" he asked distractedly.
"No, but if ya didn't find things hot at weird moments ya wouldn't be my husband," Rogue replied, starting to calm when she realised he was going to get her Spongebob. "I don't know... Logan?"
Chase's eyebrows shot up. "Should I be worried Logan knows what a Spongebob is? Oh fuck, please don't tell me he likes it too? The bloke is a sponge in pants! That is more scary than, like, clowns or that ghost in the library at the start of Ghostbusters!" Even still, he found Logan's number and hit the call button, putting the phone to his ear to wait for the answer. He kept urging Rogue to take a few steps with him, even if he was risking his balls being separated from his person.
"No, he doesn't like it! He's just had to watch it with me whenever he's come visit. Punishment for disappearin' on me for long weeks at a time." Rogue was still pouting a little at having to walk, but she managed to follow Chase's urgings. As they passed a supplies closet, her head cocked as she thought she heard something. "Hey... can ya hear that? Sounds like Logan's ringtone." Not that Logan's ringtone was anything special. The man hated anything other than just a normal ring. And even then he hated having a cell in the first place.
Chase frowned, turning to look at the supply closet and then put the phone down to study it, making sure it was ringing. "Supply closets don't ring. I should know. I've spent enough time in them," he added distractedly. He led Rogue over a couple of paces to the railing on the wall and then went to the closet, pulling the door open abruptly. The ringing emitting louder as he did, but that was the last thing he noticed. He choked on a gasp of shock and smacked a hand over his mouth. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO CAMERON?!" he demanded.
Logan was giving Cameron a good hard fuck... which he would have thought was obvious to someone like Chase, but apparently he also suffered from 'pregnant brain'. There was a growl that issued from his lips as he turned his head to look at Rogue's doctor, eyes flashing in warning. Then it seemed to sink in that he was balls-deep in Allison Cameron, his secret lover for months now... and they had an audience. An audience that didn't even know he was seeing her. He paused, and looked at her, his tongue flicking out to wet his lips. "Fuck..."
Cameron didn't even realise what was going on at first. A grunted and hushed agreement between them had briefly and distractedly came for him not to answer his phone. That should've been the end of it and it should've led to a really fantastic orgasm. But noooo. That was too easy. Still, her irritation and frustration was quickly zapped when she realised Chase was standing at the door now all red-faced and horrified, Logan had stopped moving, and none of this could lead to anything good, let alone a climax. She squeaked in surprised and pulled back, quickly shoving her skirt down and raking her fingers through her ruffled hair. "I... um... we... I..." she stammered and put her hand to her lips, waving a little with her other. "Hi."
Rogue was growing impatient, even if stopping had been what she'd wanted. "What's goin' on?! What's Logan doin' to Cameron in the closet? I can't see!" Rogue pushed off the wall and grabbed onto Chase's shoulder so she could join him in the doorway. She just looked between Logan and Cameron before her gaze settled on the older mutant and she glared at him. "You're in there havin' sex while I'm in serious amounts of pain tryin' to push out a kid?! What the fuck do ya think you're doin', bub? I can't even have sex for six damn weeks after this. How dare ya be havin' orgasms when I can't!"
Logan blinked at Rogue's tirade before he thought to tuck himself in and zip up his jeans. "I..." He really had no excuse other than Cameron drove him crazy every time she was near him. His hand might have even brushed against her ass lightly before he cleared his throat and folded his arms across his broad chest. "Shouldn't ya be lyin' in bed, or somethin'?" His gaze flicked to Chase. "Why ain't she in bed? Why are ya makin' her walk around when she's about to pop?"
"We want her to pop!" Chase shrieked in exasperation and threw his hands up in the air. He waved one in Logan and Cameron's direction, looking himself like he was about to explode. "YOU'RE HAVING SEX!" he declared and pointed accusingly, shock obviously not his friend.
Cameron folded her arms across her chest and raised an eyebrow (somewhere in that action realising her bra had gone AWOL). "Like you're uncommon to that turn of events," she said with a smirk. Her eyes flicked between Chase and Rogue, then up to Logan with a small clear of her throat. "We were just... waiting constructively," she offered and stepped out of the closet, giving Logan a perfect view right down the front of her blouse.
Logan took full advantage of the view, a smirk tugging at his lips. He really did love this woman. The revelation didn't even phase him. "Stop focusin' on us, and get back to your wife."
Rogue looked between all three now. "Oh, who cares if they're havin' sex! More power to 'em, but if I either don't get this kid outta me soon, or someone doesn't get me my Spongebob then I am rippin' both your dicks off. And there will be no sex for anyone ever. Except me and Cameron who will enjoy a beautiful lesbian affair."
Chase had been all prepared to keep shrieking in protest, as one generally does when they discover their ex is fucking the godfather-to-be of his almost daughter in a closet he was pretty sure he had fucked in at some point in the past. But at Rogue's last statement, he froze, mouth dropping open which soon broke into an indulgent grin as the image alone whipped through his mind. He caught Logan's eyes and nodded between Rogue and Cameron with a smirk.
Cameron ran her tongue along her upper lip and glanced at Rogue. "You know, blenders are really good for severed dicks, I hear," she said casually.
Rogue nodded as she turned towards Cameron and gripped the other woman's arm. "I hear that, too. Plus it'll finally answer the question about whether or not Logan can grow his back."
Logan had been frowning, not really going along with Chase's smirk. The image mostly disturbed him since he considered Rogue like his best friend, or little sister. He growled quietly and reached out a hand to give Chase a light slap to the back of his head. "Focus, bub."
Chase blinked again and then looked up at Logan with a frown. "Can you really grow your dick back?" he asked, that attention span of his waning yet again.
Cameron shook her head and seized Chase's hand roughly, dragging him back to Rogue's side. "You're trying to have a kid here, you two. Rob, don't make me do something to sever your chances of fathering anymore children. You take care of your dick and I'll take care of Logan's," she added, trying to hide a smirk.
Rogue gripped onto Chase's arm, not really caring by this point who she was holding onto. But it was nice to have her husband back to her side. "Can I please just go lie down now?"
Something seemed to shift back in focus in Chase's brain and the shock of the closet encounter was tucked to the back of his mind, no doubt to be revisited later when he realised exactly what had just been discovered. "No, just a bit further, babe," he urged and then shot Cameron and Logan a Look. "I'm paying one of my staff to keep closet watch throughout the hospital," he warned pointedly. "And no more talk of my cock or lesbians because these scrubs really don't hide anything."
He nodded at them and then turned back to Rogue. "How about Star Wars? Star Wars has crack!"
Word Count | 2,042