date my...obscene boredom(?)
My mother, about two hours ago, when we were discussing non-airplane options for my return home this Thanksgiving.
Allie: What about Greyhound? I like buses.
Mom: NO...iiiicky people ride buses? Honestly, do you know ANYBODY who rides the bus? It's what you would call 'very ghett-o' and it's not even safe. We are NOT that poor!
Oh mom. Speaking of moms, I'm a liiiittle obsessed with "Date My Mom" and everything about it: the TERRIBLE acting, the incredibly scripted lines, the sexual quotes (ex: "Tara sounds like she's got all the right...ASSpects" or "He's not a cheater- that's great for my peter!") the hysterical faces when they pick the ugly ones, and of course, the humor (ex: "Have fun mom- and DONT FART!")
I'm a little too obsessed I think. I also love how the moms say all the wrong things- like "One time, my daughter peed all over her friend's couch" or "Do you like cheese?" or "My daughter's hair dryer broke and she called me crying!" or my favorite, "Krista has a thing for penguins- she thinks they'll take over in a League of Evil Penguins!") And PS I really want one of them to fall when exiting the limo. Classic.
MTV should have done "My Super Sweet Sixteen" for my Bat Mitvah. Just IMAGINE the drama- me agreeing with my mom and letting her choose everything? Or when one of my guests was wearing my dress? Or the sad sad fact that I had a strange twitch at the time and kept flaring my nostrils and rolling my eyes and it's all on video? And I was insanely awkard....and I still am but no one's videotaping me anymore? Gonna spread my wings sweet bat mitzvahhh....it's money in the bank, MTV. I have the video. I once hid it from a nosy ex-boyfriend.
Allie: What about Greyhound? I like buses.
Mom: NO...iiiicky people ride buses? Honestly, do you know ANYBODY who rides the bus? It's what you would call 'very ghett-o' and it's not even safe. We are NOT that poor!
Oh mom. Speaking of moms, I'm a liiiittle obsessed with "Date My Mom" and everything about it: the TERRIBLE acting, the incredibly scripted lines, the sexual quotes (ex: "Tara sounds like she's got all the right...ASSpects" or "He's not a cheater- that's great for my peter!") the hysterical faces when they pick the ugly ones, and of course, the humor (ex: "Have fun mom- and DONT FART!")
I'm a little too obsessed I think. I also love how the moms say all the wrong things- like "One time, my daughter peed all over her friend's couch" or "Do you like cheese?" or "My daughter's hair dryer broke and she called me crying!" or my favorite, "Krista has a thing for penguins- she thinks they'll take over in a League of Evil Penguins!") And PS I really want one of them to fall when exiting the limo. Classic.
MTV should have done "My Super Sweet Sixteen" for my Bat Mitvah. Just IMAGINE the drama- me agreeing with my mom and letting her choose everything? Or when one of my guests was wearing my dress? Or the sad sad fact that I had a strange twitch at the time and kept flaring my nostrils and rolling my eyes and it's all on video? And I was insanely awkard....and I still am but no one's videotaping me anymore? Gonna spread my wings sweet bat mitzvahhh....it's money in the bank, MTV. I have the video. I once hid it from a nosy ex-boyfriend.