(no subject)

[allikins]

I did it

I finally did it

that which I have feared and procrastinated and fought so hard against for so long now

it is done

and I feel hollow inside

I feel like a small part of me has died and there is a gaping hole

I shed tears, though not nearly as dramatic as I'd envisioned

and while it's done, again, it's not as I envisioned, but rather the way I think it was supposed to be

and it explains, once again, why such an odd song was needed for such a powerful scene

I get it now

maybe not in the grand design

but I get it - for now...