back for the first time
ok so, even though it's a little early to even be thinking about this, i know what my new years resolution is. to start writing in my journal again. i've been majorly slacking since coming to college, and i miss having this to reflect on, no matter how trivial my entries end up being. i'm going to make a real effort, just for myself, to begin writing here regularly again.
where to begin... today was pretty much a wasted day. it was the first day in a very long time that i didn't have anything to do in the morning so i slept in, till two haha. whoops. for the rest of the day i just chilled, and rediscovered my ipod. i downloaded all the latest updates and the new dealie that gives you the app store, even though i was kinda pissed i had to pay for it. it's worth it though, some of the applications, even the free ones, are def. worth it. i also downloaded a bunch of songs, because i've been deprived of limewire for a very long time. i'm glad i did it though because it's something that i've been thinking about for a very long time but i just haven't had the time to invest in it. that's what i get for juggling 16 credits and 3 jobs, just to still be broke =[ i'm not really complaining though, honest. i really don't have a problem going to any of my jobs, even though i'm a little over orientation at this point.
in other news. i've been really disconnected lately, wanting to escape a lot. there's a lot of reasons for this, stress being the biggest one that i can pinpoint. not only do i have more responsibility than i've ever had, with so many balls in the air at once that i don't know how i'm continuing the juggle, but a lot of things in my everyday life even are changing. there's been a LOT of roommate drama lately that i spend most of my time trying really hard just not to think about. i like to think i'm not really involved in most of it, i'm aware of the situation that i'm in and i guess in some ways willing to accept it. in a perfect world i honestly don't know what i'd like to be different about the situtation. i'm really just tired of thinking about it. everyone has their own definition of right and wrong and i think there's such a thin line between doing the right thing and the wrong one, i almost never fault people i love for doing the wrong thing. i don't know if that means i have shady morals or if it just means that i understand the world better than some. i can't see faulting someone for doing something that i've done before, even if it was for different reasons and under different circumstances. i guess i got this quality from my series of strange associations in high school, but i've never been in a situation where i felt bad about it before now. i'm sort of being pulled in both directions and even though i know where my loyalty lies in that particular situation, i'm SO uncomfortable burning bridges that i don't think i'm really capable of it.
tomorrow, i NEED to study. exams are this week, and even though i only have two, my astr. one is pretty critical. and since i have to work at macy's from 7:30-11:30am before my exam at 3 on Wed, i really need to study tomorrow. and even though it's five in the morning right now and i'm not even tired because of my epic show of sleeping last night, i will wake up at a decent hour to accomplish this goal tomorrow. i'm determined. so on that note i bid you nite nite=]
where to begin... today was pretty much a wasted day. it was the first day in a very long time that i didn't have anything to do in the morning so i slept in, till two haha. whoops. for the rest of the day i just chilled, and rediscovered my ipod. i downloaded all the latest updates and the new dealie that gives you the app store, even though i was kinda pissed i had to pay for it. it's worth it though, some of the applications, even the free ones, are def. worth it. i also downloaded a bunch of songs, because i've been deprived of limewire for a very long time. i'm glad i did it though because it's something that i've been thinking about for a very long time but i just haven't had the time to invest in it. that's what i get for juggling 16 credits and 3 jobs, just to still be broke =[ i'm not really complaining though, honest. i really don't have a problem going to any of my jobs, even though i'm a little over orientation at this point.
in other news. i've been really disconnected lately, wanting to escape a lot. there's a lot of reasons for this, stress being the biggest one that i can pinpoint. not only do i have more responsibility than i've ever had, with so many balls in the air at once that i don't know how i'm continuing the juggle, but a lot of things in my everyday life even are changing. there's been a LOT of roommate drama lately that i spend most of my time trying really hard just not to think about. i like to think i'm not really involved in most of it, i'm aware of the situation that i'm in and i guess in some ways willing to accept it. in a perfect world i honestly don't know what i'd like to be different about the situtation. i'm really just tired of thinking about it. everyone has their own definition of right and wrong and i think there's such a thin line between doing the right thing and the wrong one, i almost never fault people i love for doing the wrong thing. i don't know if that means i have shady morals or if it just means that i understand the world better than some. i can't see faulting someone for doing something that i've done before, even if it was for different reasons and under different circumstances. i guess i got this quality from my series of strange associations in high school, but i've never been in a situation where i felt bad about it before now. i'm sort of being pulled in both directions and even though i know where my loyalty lies in that particular situation, i'm SO uncomfortable burning bridges that i don't think i'm really capable of it.
tomorrow, i NEED to study. exams are this week, and even though i only have two, my astr. one is pretty critical. and since i have to work at macy's from 7:30-11:30am before my exam at 3 on Wed, i really need to study tomorrow. and even though it's five in the morning right now and i'm not even tired because of my epic show of sleeping last night, i will wake up at a decent hour to accomplish this goal tomorrow. i'm determined. so on that note i bid you nite nite=]