(no subject)
Official diagnosis: Bipolar II. I've been placed on the most ridiculously expensive drug ever, an antipsychotic called ablify, which some of you may have heard of. I won't be on it next month, tho...at $483/month, there's no way i can afford it.
not much else to report, really.
A - Accidents
01. Have you ever been in a car accident? several.
02. Do you have a lot of scars? yesss.
03. Ever been in a fist fight? not really.
04. Have you ever seriously hurt anyone by mistake? no.
05. Have you ever had stitches? Where? yes. in my ears, and in my stomach.
B - Beauty
06. Do you consider yourself beautiful? sometimes.
07. Are you self conscious of how you look? not really.
08. Do you put on a lot of makeup? no.
09. Would you ever consider getting plastic surgery? not seriously.
10. What do you think makes a person beautiful? definitely inner beauty on this one.
C - Consequences
11. What was the longest amount of time you’ve been grounded for? 3 months.
12. What would you do if you got pregnant, keep it or have an abortion? keep it. i wouldn't get an abortion.
13. Do you ever think about how your actions affect other people? not really that often.
14. What do you think is the worst punishment someone could give you? whatever.
15. What is one thing you wish you didn’t do, just because it wasn’t worth it in the end? get my hips pierced? lol.
D - Dealing
16. When you are mad at someone, how do you show them? i try to keep my mouth shut. this is hard bc i really want to throw a fit.
17. Name a time when you had to be strong? i've had a few, and i'm not done yet.
18. Have you ever dealt with a divorce or parents fighting? nope. fighting, yes, but they're lovey-dovey now. thanks, cancer.
19. When people at school don’t accept you, or have problems with you, how do you react? ha, whatever.
20. Have you ever lost someone to death? Explain how you got through it. i'm about to have to deal with the hardest death of my life, i think. and i put myself into therapy to prepare.
E - Experience
21. Have you ever had a job? Any volunteer jobs? yes, and sort of.
23. Have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far? i pick the first one.
24. Do you think you are ready to be on your own (have your own home, job, etc.)? have and yes.
25. How old do you act? old.
F - Family
26. Is there anyone in your family you don’t talk to? Why? not really.
27. If you had to choose, family or friends? i'd have to have both.
29. Do you have any siblings? If so, do you ever get jealous of them? 1 sister, 2 brothers, and yes quite often.
30. How often do you spend ‘quality time’ with family members? ha, i feel like my therapist is here.
G - Growing
31. How tall are you? How tall do you wish you were? 5'4". and i'd like a couple more inches, but i'm fine with where i'm at.
32. Do you think that you have grown more in the past year than any year before that? in some ways. i feel like i've backtracked in others.
33. As a person, do you think you are mature for your age or still act childish? mature most of the time.
34. Are you scared to think that one day you will turn 30, then 40, then 50? all the time.
35. Do you believe you still have a lot to learn? oh yeah.
H - Hope
36. Love - real or not? definitely real.
37. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? usually optimistic
38. Do you believe in fate, that everything happens for a reason, or do you think that our actions lead the way?mostly fate.
39. Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? sure.
40. What gives you hope when you just feel like dying? not much.
I - Issues
41. Do you suffer from depression or constant sadness/loneliness? occasionally.
42. Do you have any type of disease or disability? turns out yes.
43. Are you currently in a hard relationship or have bad luck with the opposite sex? it's only hard bc he's married & i can't figure out why i'm retarded. hence therapy.
44. Do you think that you are alone in this world? quite often.
45. How often do you think about death, suicide or running away? ditto.
J - Jokes
47. Are you usually the one who makes people laugh,Or the other way around? both.
48. Do you cry when you laugh hard? haven't in a while.
49. Write down a hilarious moment you had with someone that makes you laugh to this day! no.
50. Do you ever get in trouble for laughing or talking a lot during class? more often. and now i suppose less often since i quit school.
K - Knowledge
51. The purpose of school: lately, to waste time. i think school is stupid.
52. Do people refer to you as smart, dumb, or average? smart.
53. What was the highest grade you have received (full course mark) ever? i was all A's till i stopped caring.
54. What was your last average? This year would you like to maintain it or aim higher? whatever. & prolly higher.
55. What do you find the most interesting subject to be (to study or to talk about)? history.
L - Love
56. Are you currently in love? If not, have you been before? yes
57. Do people around you show you a lot of love (tell you they love you, hug you, kiss you, etc.)? yes
58. Is love worth it? definitely
59. Do you hate it when girls in their young teenage years say they ‘love’ someone that they’ve been dating for a few months? i don't really care, not me.
60. Does it take a lot for you to say you love someone, or is it just a word? it takes a lot to say it.
M - Money
61. Do you believe that money makes the world go round? yes but i wish it didn't.
62. Is your family on the poor side, average, or above average when it comes to money? pooor.
63. Are you saving up for college/university, or planning to? let me pay some shit off first. & then we'll start saving.
64. Would you rather win millions of dollars & be set for life, or find the perfect person to marry & start a family with? definitely #2.
65. On a scale of 1-10, how important is money to you? well, i need it. so 10. lol.
N
--..where did they go?
O - Openness
71. How long does it take for you to open up to someone? quite a bit.
72. What does it take for you to fully trust someone? it just happens. eventually.
73. Are you generally untrusting towards people because of past experiences, or any other reason? no.
74. When are you comfortable with someone? sometimes right away. i'm a weirdo.
75. When it comes to parents and close friends, what’s the limit of what you can tell them? you'd be surprised.
P - Positive
76. Have you ever had an experience with someone that didn’t necessarily end positively? If so, would you rather erase the memory of that person because of the sad times or keep the memory of that person because of the good times? what?
77. Do you agree with the saying: better to have loved and lost than not have loved at all? yes
78. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic? What do you try to be? I already answered this.
79. Do you agree that something good can come out of everything? yes
80. Have you ever had a time where something really bad happened, but something really good happened because of it? If so, please exlain what it was: i think i need to go to bed. my body is freaking out.
i'll finish this later. like when i can read the question and not get all confused.
not much else to report, really.
A - Accidents
01. Have you ever been in a car accident? several.
02. Do you have a lot of scars? yesss.
03. Ever been in a fist fight? not really.
04. Have you ever seriously hurt anyone by mistake? no.
05. Have you ever had stitches? Where? yes. in my ears, and in my stomach.
B - Beauty
06. Do you consider yourself beautiful? sometimes.
07. Are you self conscious of how you look? not really.
08. Do you put on a lot of makeup? no.
09. Would you ever consider getting plastic surgery? not seriously.
10. What do you think makes a person beautiful? definitely inner beauty on this one.
C - Consequences
11. What was the longest amount of time you’ve been grounded for? 3 months.
12. What would you do if you got pregnant, keep it or have an abortion? keep it. i wouldn't get an abortion.
13. Do you ever think about how your actions affect other people? not really that often.
14. What do you think is the worst punishment someone could give you? whatever.
15. What is one thing you wish you didn’t do, just because it wasn’t worth it in the end? get my hips pierced? lol.
D - Dealing
16. When you are mad at someone, how do you show them? i try to keep my mouth shut. this is hard bc i really want to throw a fit.
17. Name a time when you had to be strong? i've had a few, and i'm not done yet.
18. Have you ever dealt with a divorce or parents fighting? nope. fighting, yes, but they're lovey-dovey now. thanks, cancer.
19. When people at school don’t accept you, or have problems with you, how do you react? ha, whatever.
20. Have you ever lost someone to death? Explain how you got through it. i'm about to have to deal with the hardest death of my life, i think. and i put myself into therapy to prepare.
E - Experience
21. Have you ever had a job? Any volunteer jobs? yes, and sort of.
23. Have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far? i pick the first one.
24. Do you think you are ready to be on your own (have your own home, job, etc.)? have and yes.
25. How old do you act? old.
F - Family
26. Is there anyone in your family you don’t talk to? Why? not really.
27. If you had to choose, family or friends? i'd have to have both.
29. Do you have any siblings? If so, do you ever get jealous of them? 1 sister, 2 brothers, and yes quite often.
30. How often do you spend ‘quality time’ with family members? ha, i feel like my therapist is here.
G - Growing
31. How tall are you? How tall do you wish you were? 5'4". and i'd like a couple more inches, but i'm fine with where i'm at.
32. Do you think that you have grown more in the past year than any year before that? in some ways. i feel like i've backtracked in others.
33. As a person, do you think you are mature for your age or still act childish? mature most of the time.
34. Are you scared to think that one day you will turn 30, then 40, then 50? all the time.
35. Do you believe you still have a lot to learn? oh yeah.
H - Hope
36. Love - real or not? definitely real.
37. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? usually optimistic
38. Do you believe in fate, that everything happens for a reason, or do you think that our actions lead the way?mostly fate.
39. Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? sure.
40. What gives you hope when you just feel like dying? not much.
I - Issues
41. Do you suffer from depression or constant sadness/loneliness? occasionally.
42. Do you have any type of disease or disability? turns out yes.
43. Are you currently in a hard relationship or have bad luck with the opposite sex? it's only hard bc he's married & i can't figure out why i'm retarded. hence therapy.
44. Do you think that you are alone in this world? quite often.
45. How often do you think about death, suicide or running away? ditto.
J - Jokes
47. Are you usually the one who makes people laugh,Or the other way around? both.
48. Do you cry when you laugh hard? haven't in a while.
49. Write down a hilarious moment you had with someone that makes you laugh to this day! no.
50. Do you ever get in trouble for laughing or talking a lot during class? more often. and now i suppose less often since i quit school.
K - Knowledge
51. The purpose of school: lately, to waste time. i think school is stupid.
52. Do people refer to you as smart, dumb, or average? smart.
53. What was the highest grade you have received (full course mark) ever? i was all A's till i stopped caring.
54. What was your last average? This year would you like to maintain it or aim higher? whatever. & prolly higher.
55. What do you find the most interesting subject to be (to study or to talk about)? history.
L - Love
56. Are you currently in love? If not, have you been before? yes
57. Do people around you show you a lot of love (tell you they love you, hug you, kiss you, etc.)? yes
58. Is love worth it? definitely
59. Do you hate it when girls in their young teenage years say they ‘love’ someone that they’ve been dating for a few months? i don't really care, not me.
60. Does it take a lot for you to say you love someone, or is it just a word? it takes a lot to say it.
M - Money
61. Do you believe that money makes the world go round? yes but i wish it didn't.
62. Is your family on the poor side, average, or above average when it comes to money? pooor.
63. Are you saving up for college/university, or planning to? let me pay some shit off first. & then we'll start saving.
64. Would you rather win millions of dollars & be set for life, or find the perfect person to marry & start a family with? definitely #2.
65. On a scale of 1-10, how important is money to you? well, i need it. so 10. lol.
N
--..where did they go?
O - Openness
71. How long does it take for you to open up to someone? quite a bit.
72. What does it take for you to fully trust someone? it just happens. eventually.
73. Are you generally untrusting towards people because of past experiences, or any other reason? no.
74. When are you comfortable with someone? sometimes right away. i'm a weirdo.
75. When it comes to parents and close friends, what’s the limit of what you can tell them? you'd be surprised.
P - Positive
76. Have you ever had an experience with someone that didn’t necessarily end positively? If so, would you rather erase the memory of that person because of the sad times or keep the memory of that person because of the good times? what?
77. Do you agree with the saying: better to have loved and lost than not have loved at all? yes
78. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic? What do you try to be? I already answered this.
79. Do you agree that something good can come out of everything? yes
80. Have you ever had a time where something really bad happened, but something really good happened because of it? If so, please exlain what it was: i think i need to go to bed. my body is freaking out.
i'll finish this later. like when i can read the question and not get all confused.